This post is for the grown folks only. And it's just another reason the field's blog won't be going mainstream anytime soon.
Anyway, stay with me on this one, I need your input.
Over the holiday season I was hanging with some of my peeps, and as guys tend to do, we found ourselves bullshitting each other and making small talk about damn near everything. Eventually, (don't ask me how) the subject turned to things guys do to make their intimate experiences last a little longer. --I swear, the shit guys talk about-- I heard everything from giving Mr. Johnson a Colgate smile to thinking of ugly battle scenes in the heat of...ahh battle; just to make Mr. Johnson stand at a attention a little longer.
Then we tried to figure out how long was enough. Was it really anything over that six minute mark? Is six minutes more than enough? Or is six minutes just a starting point? When does the need to start thinking of tricks to...ahem, stay on top of things kick in? I mean if you are two minutes in and you start to feel a surge (Thank you General Petraeus) do you start thinking of those ugly battle scenes? (Feel free to leave a suggestion on this one. I am sure someone will appreciate it)
I actually remembered something I did awhile back and suggested an introduction to Palm-ela an hour or so before the actual act. Of course everyone laughed. "See field, that's your damn problem, you love Palm-ela too much." Ahh yeah, I never denied that. She has been with me from the beginning, and I have made quite a few practice runs with her. In fact, I think she might have been my first love. Honestly, if more of my peeps would fall in love with Palm-ela, we probably wouldn't have all these unwanted children running around and broken dysfunctional families all over the place. Damn field, if I did that, how the hell would I get it up for that moment? It's called foreplay neanderthal.....
They can laugh all they want, I think practice makes perfect.
Yes, yes, perfect practice makes perfect, even. It's important for a guy to orgasm well just as a girl needs to. Unfortunately, many guys settle for the subdued orgasm because they've never really had a powerful one before. But as far as keeping the Johnson up, it's really all about foreplay. There's more than one way to "take care" of business, but if all you're doing to do is touch her boobs, touch her butt, and then finish in a few minutes, you won't get anything out of it.
ReplyDeleteAs far as you being mainstream, last I checked, you're all over the place, and a must-read and must-link on every Black blog I know. Just admit it, you're popular.
"Unfortunately, many guys settle for the subdued orgasm because they've never really had a powerful one before..."
ReplyDeletedamn jose, you should be a male sex therapist :) That was deep.
Unfortunately for me I don't know it my orgasms are subdued or not.
I think I have to start paying more attention to me during sex :)
Foreplay?
ReplyDeleteForeplay??
THERE, my friend, is the problem.
It ain't "foreplay." Sticking Tab A into Slot B is not and should not be the focus and ultimate goal of... uhhhmmm... intimate relations.
It's sex play. Touching kissing nibbling rubbing in all the right places (and if you've been paying any attention worth a damn, you know what those places are-- and when they need attention!) LONG before Tab A goes into Slot B-- even if Tab ever actually gets there.
Guys are spending too much time thinking about "fucking" when they should be thinking about sensuality.
And in some of the most intense, enjoyable sensual pleasures I've ever enjoyed, Tab A never got to Slot B-- yet Tab and Slot were both very happy.
Renko
^ he it on the head best.."Guys are spending too much time thinking about "fucking" when they should be thinking about sensuality"...
ReplyDelete'nuff said.
Hi FN,
ReplyDeleteHappy New Year.
I'm curious how long it took you to find a photo of a loving Black couple?
I often have problems finding stock photos of Black people, especially anything involving love.
~
ReplyDeleteMinnie palm and her five sisters during one's teenaged years help to build insensitivity and endurance; when I finally did get some, I could do the do for a minimum of 30 to 40 minutes prior to ejaculating.
I'd stay with girlfriends that I was really into until they'd have at minimum 5 orgasms; this would take considerably more than 40 minutes, and it was back breaking labour.
I learned the secret of excellent sex, too late for my back. Some call it tantra, trantric while others do not.
One back saving secret is to stay away from thick women, for they lack the stamina to keep their thighs up and out of the way for extended sessions, and the male ends up doing a lot of back breaking heavy lifting and thigh pushing (back).
`
Okay, I didn't need to know you had a lil' freak in you, Field. LOL.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, the things you brothas talk about when all of you know you are talking grade-A, major league Bullshyt. ROFL
As for the last part of your post, you sound like the male version of Joycelyn Elders...so I guess the next confession you'll be making is that, as Chris Rock says, you guys have a good stash of porn tucked away to help you out with Palm-eta.
TMI. ::shakes head::
For staying power, I think you might need to tune in to a Cialis commercial, because that fake band ruined an Elvis Presley song with their Viagra version of it (and as usual, the obligatory lone brotha for diversity's sake is on the drums).
Otherwise, it's very easy to see how men are consistently ruled by their little "heads" and wonder why they get into so much trouble.
I like what comedian Bruce Bruce said about foreplay. He said that it is a 24-hour-a-day-dealing-with-your-woman day-to-day basis. Yes, that fat Motha seems to know plenty about what women want...and he probably gets more action than all of you and your boys combined.
We women think a guy with a six-pack can bring it, but more often than not, the big boy has skills, too...
One back saving secret is to stay away from thick women, for they lack the stamina to keep their thighs up and out of the way for extended sessions...
ReplyDeleteROFLMAO!!
Of course, the answer is laying on your side, partner plowing you from the back, no stress, no strain and very deep penetration.
Makes my eyes cross just thinking about it. *wink*
~
ReplyDeletebig boy would have to be big in more ways than one; that is, he would have to be well endowed in order to have enough pipe extending beyond all that blubber for girlfriend to get at (it).
Imagine having to lift up one's belly and placing it on her buttocks, in order to get at the goody. Gross!!
`
I used to think that people talking about lasting for 30-40 min were lying, but not all of them were. The brother talking about the art of tantra is dead on. If you want to prolong your "sex play" (its not just f-ing- also very true) past 6 min you'll need to practice with "palm-ela" separating your orgams from ejaculation. Physiologically they each use separate neural pathways and with practice, patience and slowing down right before the point of no return you can actually learn to creep to that point, stop and have a mini orgasm with no ejaculate (a little might come out but with time none will). The PC muscle is the muscle that flexes when you orgasm. So flexing it daily will give you greater control and knowledge of your orgasms and ejaculation response. The bigger and stronger the PC is the stronger your orgasms will (Actually women should do it too!) be and the greater control you’ll have. It’s a muscle so flex away (stop the flow of urine to learn where and how to strengthen it). Your “pen 15” won’t pass out, because the energy, vitamins, and life force used to ejaculate wasn’t spent. Ideally, you can go on thrusting away until you reach another mini peak. With each peak that's reached it takes greater intensity to get to the next peak. You’ll learn that you’ll be able to thrust harder for longer, which benefits the women in our lives. I only wish, I learned this a long time ago. It’s essentially unlearning the boyish skeet sessions we used to have when we were trying NOT to get caught when we were 14. Unlearning anything takes time so give it a few months and you’ll be +20 min in no time. I’m on my way to 30 min with regularity. It can be done, REAL TALK. It does get kinda boring when your “practicing with palm-ela” but when you’re in it for real, well worth it! If you don’t believe me just google or check out any book on TANTRA. This Sh*t is the truth! If I knew this sh*t in high school…Ha!
ReplyDeleteIf all you want is to screw, then perhaps you have a point, brother Nsangoma.
ReplyDeleteBut if you're interested in sensual, sexual pleasure with a fun-loving, sensual woman-- thick is where it's at.
IMHO, of course. :D
Oh, and this being A-Merry-Ca (thank you, Field, that's how I refer to The Homeland anymore!) there are a LOT more thick ladies than thin.
Imagine having to lift up one's belly and placing it on her buttocks, in order to get at the goody.
ReplyDeleteBwaaaaaaaaaa.
Oh, nsangoma, you're in rare form today, OK?
Of course, I married well and my partner is hung like a fucking horse: fat, long and he can stay hard for an hour or longer.
If we split up it would be a tall order for me to find another man able to touch both sides the way Jim can.
Guiness Stout 6oz's, teaspoon of Nutmeg, 1 raw egg (organic), tablespoon evaporated milk. A book called Cultivating Male Sexual Energy. Focus on her Not the thrusting cause that might not be it for her each woman is different. Talk to her, during conversations she will tell you what she needs to bring her there, then it matters not how long you can last as long as you can make her reach the drop to sleep point.
ReplyDelete"giving Mr. Johnson a Colgate smile"
ReplyDeleteWhat the hell is that? Rubbing toothpaste on your penis??
and
@Christopher's FIRST comment
Oooooohhh yeeaaahhh, thats the stuff baby!
L
01 03 08
ReplyDeleteHhehehehehe Six minutes is a bit short, but then again if it was six minutes of the most intense passionate copulation AFTER intense foreplay then that might work...Hhehehehe Palm ela heheheheh that is a good one. And you are right. If more people had less shame about pleasuring themselves, then we probably wouldn't have so many sexual pathologies (INCLUDING having kids out of wedlock!)
How long is enough? If she's giving that guttural rumble rather than squeaks, it can be a couple of minutes or a couple of seconds. It's all on her. If's she's happy, that's all that counts. Take your mind off the clock and things will be fine.
ReplyDeleteALERT: The Wire is on HBO on demand so I'm gonna order the first episode of this season rather than watch the pundits dissect the voting of about four thousand farmer dickheads in Iowa deciding my nation's fate....
Arousal should be the primary goal, not how long an erection can last. Although I'll note that in my sexual experience, 6 minutes would be unusually short; have you tried orgasming through a locus other than your most obvious sexual organ?
ReplyDeleteWow, your friends are sexually retarded if they didn't think of, ah...using their hands...a little bit before the main event.
ReplyDeleteAnd what the hell is a Colgate smile?
"I'm curious how long it took you to find a photo of a loving Black couple?"
ReplyDeletemes deux cents, I got mine off the Net. Feel free to use it, it's free.
mahndisa, spoken like someone who is truy comfortable in her sexual skin.
ensayn, that Guiness reference makes me think you are a "yawdie".
Have you ever heard of "Irish Moss"? They say that works as well.
iet, and nsangoma,whenever I think of tantra sex I think of sky diving. It seems like something I would l ike to do until I actually try it.
How many of those 40 minutes are actually spent having sex?
"One back saving secret is to stay away from thick women, for they lack the stamina to keep their thighs up and out of the way for extended sessions, and the male ends up doing a lot of back breaking heavy lifting and thigh pushing (back)."
To all my size 14 and above sisters out there, please take up your beef with nsangoma, not me. I love you all :)
Bad christopher and lola ;)
"How long is enough? If she's giving that guttural rumble rather than squeaks, it can be a couple of minutes or a couple of seconds. It's all on her. If's she's happy, that's all that counts. Take your mind off the clock and things will be fine."
CC, I feel you on this one.
"have you tried orgasming through a locus other than your most obvious sexual organ?"
zimbel, please explain :O
on the topic of sensuality vs. having a one-track goal in mind....i'm going to email you an article a friend recently sent me on the topic...lemme know what you think if you get a chance to read it (it's short)
ReplyDelete-elizabeth
Tantric Sex. Needs a god partner though.
ReplyDelete"And what the hell is a Colgate smile?"
ReplyDeletewoozie if you are going to be my grammar daddy you have to stay on top of things. Check lola's comments earlier on, she nailed it :)
Thanks elizabeth, I will check it out. (short or not)
~
ReplyDelete... I think of tantra sex I think of sky diving. It seems like something I would like to do until I actually try it.
field negro 7:23 PM
You may be tantric already, since you've been asked to keep your fingernails manicured.
a quick quiz:
are you familiar with the yoni?; that pink flesh that appears when the upper vaginal lips are separated to expose the clitoris; in the west, that shape, the shape of that pink flesh is called the valentine;
if you have done any of the following, you are on your way if not there already
tantric is about chi, energy, sexual energy, circuits of sexual energy; it involves the use of one's fingers to stimulate one's partner to clitoral orgasm, or g-spot orgasm; it involves the simultaneous use of one's fingers and one's mouth to stimulate one's partner to simultaneous Grafenberg-spot and clitoral orgasm; it involves the use of one's mouth to stimulate one's partner to clitoral orgasm.
it gets deeper than this, it gets into explosive female orgasms, implosive female orgasms, whole body female orgasms;
women orgasm so hard that they seemingly levitate inches above the bed;
there are other interpretations for the yoni, so I'll stop here and let the sexperts take over; especially for lingam studies;
the prostate is supposedly the male g-spot; here I lose interest
`
Rosie Palm and her five sisters are good company to keep, but guys, please, watch it with the death grip. When you train yourself to need that much pressure, it makes it difficult for the average gal to rouse you from a rest state.
ReplyDeleteHow much you wanna bet that Barack and Michelle are gonna have the Luther playin' tonight? Whoo hoo!
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't recommend the toothpaste trick. Sometimes the head is too sensitive. You want to stave off orgasm, not sex all together. Egads! Anyway, the pinch trick seems to work for a lot of men. Rosy palm is a good trick, too, but as some have mentioned previously, it tends to mute the intensity of the climax and sometimes the rigidity of the erection itself.
ReplyDeleteAnother good trick is to never start in the position that you like the best. For example, if "doggy style" is what what seals the deal for you, start with woman on top, etc.
For me, the amount of time that is necessary depends on the mood and atmosphere or the encounter. If it is one of those romantic evenings, exploration and foreplay take up most of the time anyway. Anything longer than 25 - 30 minutes of penetration becomes a trial (at least for me anyway). Then, there are those moments when the last thing you want is foreplay. Six minutes of that kind of intense activity can be fun and satisfying. :) Then again, maybe it's just me...
I learned tantric sex in school, and it got my the girl that I eventually married. I studied women's movements and reactions during foreplay so that time 'inside' really didn't matter much. I've never been a 40 minute brother, but thats mainly because I'm not in the best shape, and I dont need 40 minutes, if you are sensual, intercourse is simply the "act III" of sex, not the entire play. Part of sex and/or sensuality for me also has alot to do with the kind of connection you have with a woman, and what kind of man she thinks shes with. IN boxing there are styles, sluggers, boxers, etc. In sex, there are styles, fuckers, lovers, etc. I am a lover, my experience has always been that if you pull a woman in deep enough, her mind handles 80% of the sexual encounter. I've had women orgasm without any contact with the vagina. I've had women have multiple orgasms through foreplay. I call it my magnetic. Get a woman caught in your magnetic, and sex just becomes an extension of the other parts of your relationship.
ReplyDeleteYou still havent said what a "Colegate smile" is...we'll wait, lol.
ReplyDeleteL
@field negro-
ReplyDeleteI note that a bunch of other respondents refer to Tantric sex; I am unfamiliar with that particular method, but I've found that there are two ways for a male to have "staying power":
1) If they can last for, say 6 minutes, pull out, and do something else after 5, for a significant period of time (a few minutes), then repeat to taste.
2) Separate orgasm from ejaculation (the advantage is that it's the ejaculation, not the orgasm, which tends to exhaust males quickly). There are many ways to do this (rings named after male chickens are a device to help do this), but I think the easiest is likely just to orgasm due to arousal in a different place. If you're aroused enough, anywhere can work, but if your partner wants to try this, I'd start somewhere with plenty of nerve endings - a nipple, a hand, lips, toes, anus, the nerve bundle behind the scrotum, or wherever you happen to like. It's really easy- just play (with whatever you like other than the most obvious sexual organ) until orgasm, switching places in the case of over-arousal, then returning later; obviously, if you haven't done this before, if can take far longer than a "normal" orgasm. Note that this works for either sex, but that females tend not to have the exhaustion problem that makes this particularly useful for males.
As a side-effect, #2 makes it easier to get a male to have multiple orgasms (although this is quite possible through the most obvious sexual organ, it's easier elsewhere).