Peacefully transferring power?

Mr. trump said the quiet part out loud yesterday, as he declared that he will not go peacefully into  the night if he loses the upcoming election. That's a scary thought, and one that most Americans could never have imagined having when they put an egomaniacal sociopath from Long Island in charge of the country. 

But here we are, and the chaos just seems to be intensifying with each passing day. I honestly think that if trump loses (and that's a big if, because as terrible as this presidency has been, there is a certain segment of the American electorate who believe that having a white nationalist in charge is still comforting) he will have his cult members take to the streets and set his lawyers loose on the judicial system to plead to all of those extreme right wing leaning Judges who owe him their appointments. America had better hope that this election will be a landslide one way or the other, because if it's close it won't be pretty. 

It's amazing, though, to see Mr. trump leading in some swing states and staying within striking distance in the national polls. Not surprisingly if you look at most of these polls you will see that Mr. trump is leading among white voters, which is not surprising to us black folks out here. We know the deal. 

Finally, speaking of black folks, I saw the following article recently and I found it interesting. Why? Because I am always trying to bring the races together. 

"George Floyd’s death at the hands of Minneapolis police in May gave way to a long-overdue national reckoning on race. 

The protests that followed sparked change, but we still have a very long way to go — as evidenced, in part, by the recent police shooting of Jacob Blake in Kenosha, Wisconsin. 

The last several months have been particularly draining for Black folks in this country, between the racial upheaval, a pandemic that affects them disproportionately and an upcoming presidential election with so much at stake for their communities.

It’s imperative that we continue the conversation about race on both a national and personal level — even when it’s not dominating the news cycle. Those who want to be allies must keep listening, learning and taking action that supports the Black community. 

To that end, we asked Black people to reveal what they wish the white people in their lives knew and understood. Here’s what they said. 

Responses have been lightly edited and condensed for clarity and length. 

1. I notice your silence about the acts of racism and other injustices in the news.

“There are a lot of issues that sometimes only affect or disproportionally affect a community. That should not be an exoneration from caring or paying attention. When you are silent, I often feel like I have no choice but to question: Where do you stand? Do you care about what’s happening?

This doesn’t mean you have to start talking politics and social justice 24/7 — I still enjoy seeing puppy pics and newborn photos on my timeline! But we can’t ignore what’s happening, and it is unacceptable to stay neutral. If days, months, years go by and you never discuss these issues or engage with anything I say in person or online, that sends a clear message. It’s difficult to believe that you care.” — Candace Howze, writer and multimedia artist 

2. And it hurts when you speak out but then suddenly go quiet on these issues, too.

“When we see your enthusiasm for justice wane after just a few weeks of another murder or police brutality against us, it’s a psychological struggle for us at times to stay positive about the friendship. Maybe you no longer know what to say or do, maybe you don’t want to keep bringing it up out of fear of making us relive painful moments. But the truth is, those thoughts are running through our minds, regardless, at some point throughout most days.

If you never bring it up again, it leaves us questioning how real we can be around you. How open, honest, and raw can we be? The silence or quieting of your voices make us turn the focus from the real issues to centering our thoughts around you and the realness of the friendship. It makes us wonder how much you understand — or want to understand — systemic racism, and if we can trust you to have our back in covert racist situations. When you go quiet, it’s painful.”  ― Michelle Saahene, co-founder of From Privilege to Progress

3. Being Black in this country can be exhausting. 

“As a Black person, I have to conform to societal standards to exist in this country. I have to create a caricature palatable enough to comfort white people in white spaces so that I’ll make it home to see my family. I can’t afford to be anything other than what society demands me to be. If I ever become a hashtag, my family will know it wasn’t because I didn’t comply.” — Brittany Neighbors

4. Don’t expect me to educate you on racism.

“As a Black man in a predominately white industry, neighborhood and social circle, I do field questions, especially over the last few months. My own self-awareness is full of blind spots, and I am not a fount of knowledge in this area — I’m a long way from it. I answer with honesty and transparency, but it is not my job to educate you. There are amazing resources out there for you to explore and start to build your own understanding and awareness.

I have seen the same at work, with a Black employee being expected to deliver on inclusion despite it not being related to her role. I am happy to have those difficult conversations, but you need to know for yourself. Then I can provide a little help in building your own house of awareness.” ― Lee Chambers, environmental psychologist and well-being consultant

5. Yes, we’re living through a difficult time, but I don’t need your pity. 

“Just because there is more hate openly directed toward BIPOC right now, please don’t feel sorry for my family or me because we are Black. I am a proud Black woman who loves everything about my race and would never trade in my Blackness for anything ‘easier.’ Save your pity for the racist, whose world is made small and toxic by their limiting beliefs.” — Laura Cathcart Robbins, writer and host of “The Only One In The Room” podcast

6. Listen when I’m talking about my struggles, instead of trying to interject with your own. 

“When we share our stories of racism, injustice and discrimination, we don’t need you to chime in about your hardships, too. They are not, and will never be, the same. If we are comfortable sharing what we experience as Black people, it is best to listen, validate the feelings and empathize.” ― LeNaya Smith Crawford, marriage and family therapist and holistic wellness expert

7. Saying I’m ‘articulate’ isn’t a compliment — it’s a microaggression. 

“I can’t tell you how many white people in my life thought they were paying me a compliment by suggesting that I ‘don’t talk like I’m Black.’ How you speak has everything to do with education, culture and the language spoken at home, and nothing to do with race. Also, if speaking properly is ‘talking white,’ how do you explain the inordinate number of inarticulate Caucasian people on reality television?” ― Cathcart Robbins

8. Your racist jokes aren’t amusing, they’re offensive. 

“Too many times, I have been in circles where racially insensitive jokes are passed around and you hear the ‘it’s not that serious’ trope. You’re right. It’s not that serious — for you, who is not Black. I want them to take the time to listen to our experiences while keeping in mind the point about [Black people] not all being the same. I want them to inform themselves as to why these jokes are not appropriate.” ― Jan-Kristòf Louis-Mansano, school counselor .... [See the other 8 here]

In these turbulent and uncertain times, aren't you glad that you have your friendly neighborhood Field Negro to help us to understand each other?