Hi Jerry welcome to your new home. I know this isn't quite what you expected but sometimes the best laid plans of mice and men if you know what I mean.
There must be a mistake....ahh what's your name?
Just call me Reds.
Yeah well "Reds" this isn't quite what I expected, I mean where are all the Angels, the streets of gold, and the pearly gates?
Sorry Jerry that's in the other place.
This isn't fair, after all the good works I did while I was alive, this is the reward I get?
What good works?
Well, like all the people I brought to Christ. Heck I had a congregation of 24,000 members at one time. I, along with my moral majority, was responsible for the rise of the Southern christian conservative movement,and the election of republican presidents like Ronald Reagan and the first George Bush.
Yeah, well that's exactly why you are here.
But my God man....
Ahh don't use that name down here.
Sorry, but I am looking around and recognizing people down here like Lee Harvey Oswald, Ted Bundy, and Al Capone, and I have to wonder; how did I end up in the same place as these ungodly souls?
Yeah well didn't you say after 911 that "God continues to lift the curtain and give America what she deserves"? I mean you basically blamed Gays and the ACLU for the attacks on America. Not to mention you said that "If you're not a born again Christian, you're a failure as a human being." You also said that the "ACLU is to Christians what the American Nazi party is to Jews." Then you supported the apartheid government of South Africa and said that minority rule is a good thing there. Now if all that doesn't qualify you for a permanent home down here I don't know what does.
Yes but I fought for christian values and returning America to her true christian roots all of my life.
Yes and you also supported the segregation of America's citizens for a large part of your life, and went as far to speak at segregationist rallies. You started racially segregated schools to avoid public school desegregation for crying out loud!
Yes but that was a long time ago. I stopped supported those ideas before I came down here.
Speaking of down here,is it always going to be this hot?
Yes I am afraid so Jerry, in fact, it's going to get a lot hotter.