Friday, March 08, 2013

A concealed weapon twist, and the c*** blocking lion.

Harris of Ada, Okla. was arrested while in a car with another woman, Jennifer Delancy, outside this Dairy Lou restaurant. When Harris got to the jail, she was searched and allegedly found to have some plastic bags of meth in the crack of her buttocks and a gun in her vagina. 

 

The revolver was loaded — with three live bullets and one spent shell in the case. They also found bags of meth stuffed up her backside. [Source]


Hold up, a loaded gun in her vagina? Oh lawd! How far will you gun lovers go?

Now that's a concealed weapon for your ass. What if she didn't
remember to remove it before her man decided to give her the red light special?
The poor guy would have lost his johnson, or his face, depending on where he…well, you know.
Anyhoo, all is well that ends well. They caught the culprit before she could manage to do any damage to the sexual ecosystem. Imagine the reverberations if this thing had played itself out: Lorena Bobbit redux with a much scarier twist.
 
"Being brought to jail, she told police she needed to go to the bathroom — and then claimed she was on her period so could not change into "prison clothes."
Finally agreeing to a body cavity search, it was then that officers found the weapon and the bags of crystal meth .

Officer Kathy Unbewust said she "observed at that time a wooden and metal item sticking out from her vagina area."

Argh!

 Oh well, at least it wasn't holstered. Officer Umbewust, you missed something... let me stop.

Finally, to stay with the adult rated theme tonight, I have another disturbing story to report.

Now before I tell the story, I need all of you reading this to admit it; you all have had sex in some very dangerous and exotic places. Still, I bet that wherever you got your freak on there was no danger of being eaten by a voyeuristic lion.

"A lion reportedly attacked a man and woman having sex in a bush in Africa, killing the woman.
 
"Unfortunately the woman, who was also known as Mai Desire, was mauled to death by the lion, but her boyfriend managed to escape naked and he was only wearing a condom," a source reportedly told the outlet. "The two were having their quality time near Mahombekombe Primary School."

The man eventually notified police who, along with officials from the Zimbabwe Parks & Wildlife Management Authority, accompanied him to the scene where they allegedly found the woman's mauled body, according to the report." [Source]

OK, brownie points for Mai's partner because he was wearing a condom. Of course he loses brownie points for running away and leaving poor Mai at the mercy of the lion.














 
         

20 comments:

Desertflower said...

Lol! God Field, where do you find these things!!!

That chick liked her sex with a bang!

As for the lion story...mmmmm...I dunno, sounds like something else was going on...

Anonymous said...

I'll bet Nuwang could hide an AK and bag of pork rinds and nothing would be poking out.

Anonymous said...

Field, Harris is from Oklahoma where women DO use their vaginas for holsters. They are some dangerous women, esp the white women.

The Blacks pose no danger at all because they still carry the genes from the plantation where they still say "yes'em" and "yes sir" to Whites. They have got to be the most docile Negroes in the country.

Anonymous said...

Dear Mr Field, I am an expert on lions and can tell you that lions could care less if humans are having sex in the bushes. What lions mind is humans don't do it in bushes that belong to lions. You see, lions are very territorial. They put their scent on certain bushes to let other animals know not to come near.

Mr Field, the lion was only trying to protect it's territory. That bush was very important to it.

Anonymous said...

Sex is for procreation, not some sexual enjoyment. That is what's wrong in this sex addicted country....MISPLACED VALUES.

That lion was sent by GOD as a warning. That woman hiding a gun in her huge vagina has commited an unspeakable sin. And so have YOU, Field for posting something so dirty.

Anonymous said...

Field, down in Texas, and this is no lie, Texas women carry shot guns in their vagina. I know it's hard for you to believe, seeing how you are not a Texan, but it's common knowledge here. You can ask our Governor. He'll tell you.

Everything is BIG in Texas.

Whitey's Conspiracy said...

"Hold up, a loaded gun in her vagina? Oh lawd! How far will you gun lovers go?"

----------------

All the way past the handle, obviously.

Immanentize the eschaton said...

The Obama-Democratic revolution is best described as gnostic. “The Democrats’ grab for total power—over the climate, over health care, over death, even over all future legislation, makes it clear that they are no longer ordinary liberal or progressive politicians. Rather, they are gnostic activists who seek to overcome the order of existence, which they see as false and alienating, and draw god-like power into themselves.

Immanentize the eschaton said...

As Winston Churchill put it, the “inherent virtue” of socialism is the “equal sharing of misery.” This is indeed true. For the left, the ordinary world, which is a world of material and spiritual hierarchies, a world characterized by inequality of goods, is intolerable. They prefer a world characterized by equality of misery. Their practical agenda is to seize total control over society and reduce us to such misery. But not all of us. They will carefully reserve special privileges for themselves and their friends.

This is the nature of the age-old gnostic rebellion against the order of the world, which for the first time in history has gained political power in America. It is, ultimately, a rebellion against God, and therefore a people who follow God—perhaps only a people who follow God—will be able to defeat it.

Slim Whitman said...

Taxes should be regressive. It might incentivize poor people to work harder.

Gabe Kotter said...

New York already leads the nation in spending per pupil. New York City wastes a jaw-dropping $20,276 per student per year. Yet only 60.1% graduate, and only 20% of those can read well enough to take college courses.

The NYC public school system is a glorified babysitting service; its astronomical cost is crippling.

If we want a future as anything but a Third World hellhole, we need to get education out of the hands of the government and unions immediately.

field negro said...

"Mr Field, the lion was only trying to protect it's territory. That bush was very important to it."

"That bush?" Now see...

"The Obama-Democratic revolution is best described as gnostic.."

We could only wish.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

I'll bet Nuwang could hide an AK and bag of pork rinds and nothing would be poking out.


And a small family - Or a big family of small people.

Lawd help anyone that gets near that cavernous cesspool.

Desertflower said...

Been thinking about that lion story and uh uh. Here's what I believe happened. He tied her to that bush knowing full well that the lion was in that vecinity so it would kill her. Because how in hell is it that it attacked her and not him? He said " let's have some kinky sex, let me tie you to the bush" then he left her to the lion.

Who knows if he even brought spectators and charged $.

I smell a crime there. That should be investigated!

Carolyn said...

"Hold up, a loaded gun in her vagina? Oh lawd! How far will you gun lovers go?

Now that's a concealed weapon for your ass. What if she didn't
remember to remove it before her man decided to give her the red light special?
The poor guy would have lost his johnson, or his face, depending on where he…well, you know.
Anyhoo, all is well that ends well. They caught the culprit before she could manage to do any damage to the sexual ecosystem. Imagine the reverberations if this thing had played itself out: Lorena Bobbit redux with a much scarier twist."
__________________________________

Field...LMAO! I haven't laughed that hard in a long time. My side aches...I'm too old for this!!! :-)

PilotX said...

Completely unlike the GOP which has absolutely no interest in telling a woman what to do with her body and telling people who the can and can't marry. The repubs are all about "freedom" as long as they get to choose what we are free to do.

Anonymous said...

Geez Field, didn't you know that a post about some redneck's vagina would result in a comment directed at me by pinkie d*ck racist mutant assnon?

FUCK YOU, that's not to pencil d*ck, that's to YOU Field since there's no low a puck ass craka can go against a Black woman that YOU won't indirectly support with comment "moderation".

DQAE

Freedom from Choice is what you want said...

"The repubs are all about "freedom" as long as they get to choose what we are free to do."

Which party wants to take away your choice whether or not you own a gun? Or whether or not you wish to purchase health insurance? The democrats don't even think you should have the choice to buy a 17 oz soda.

Anonymous said...

Field , Haha feel the wrath of the good Dr. And I thought the racist bitch only hated us crackers. Oh my.

Anonymous said...

any gal who wants human cock send a naked picture to daniel.davies@hotmail.com