Today is "Black Friday" in A-merry-ca. And in case you are visiting from another planet and think it's a day when A-mery-cans go to an NBA game, or it's an extra day that was created for black people because February only has 28, it's not. "Black Friday" is a day when A-merry-cans lose their natural minds while shopping to save a few dollars.
Mrs. Field wanted to get the field out shopping this morning, but I would rather spend the day locked in a room full of black republicans than set foot in a mall or a box store today.
Whose idea was this anyway? The day after stuffing yourself with Turkey, you get up at five in the morning, run to a store, and wait in line to save $30 on a freaking T.V. set. Only in A-merry-ca. Just what we need, another day dedicated to shopping, and crass commercialism. This dumb ass day has card companies written all over it. I bet we will be seeing a section of the card store dedicated to "Black Friday" soon. "Happy Black Friday", Happy Shopping Day" "May All Your Shopping Days Be Happy Ones". Give me a break!
"Black Friday", of course, might not sell like all the other phony ass made up holidays that's been sold to us. That's because A-merry-cans don't like that word, "black", too much. A-merry-cans usually associate the word black with bad things, so I am not sure if the retailers and card companies will want to keep that name. They might want to consider calling it "Retail Give Day" or some shit like that. That way A-merry-cans can shop until their hearts content without the stigma of that word, black, being associated with it.
Still, whatever they call it, it won't stop A-merry-cans from shopping. A-merry-cans love to shop, and any excuse to shop for them is always welcome. --- And we wonder why we owe all those other countries so much money-- Credit crisis my ass. As long as we can save a few bucks on that "play- station", who cares?
Before Mrs. Field left to play "extreme fighting" shopper's edition, she told me to keep my cell phone on and with me at all times; just in case she happens to find something at the store that I might like. My phone will be on, but it won't make a difference. Mrs. Field like other A-merry-cans will be caught up in the shopping frenzy known as "Black Friday", and the only thing that could possibly stop her is an act of God.