Saturday, June 06, 2009

Stop the monorail I want to get off!

From the Main Street parade, to the Jungle Cruise, to It's A Small World, to The Monster's Comedy Show, to Peter Pan's Flight, to.......I swear that by the time I got to Minnie's House I was ready to bring old Walt from the dead and put his ass down again. There ought to be a law against this. It is just not fair to you parents out there. You are slaves to the marketing of Disney and their control of your children's minds. You are, in effect, pawns in an incredible conspiracy.

I have a new found respect for every parent in A-merry-ca. And if you are a single parent, you deserve a congressional medal of honor. My hands, neck and my feet are about to fall off of my body from carrying a four year old all over the Magic Kingdom. My ears are still ringing not only from the screams of these little aliens whose minds have been taken over by all things Disney,but from the chi ching of money passing hands to Walt's faithful servants.

"Are you having fun?" "Uncle Field this is the best fun I have ever had. Are we going to Toontown now? And are we going to see Nemo tomorrow?"

My flight leaves this planet of the children tomorrow at exactly 8:30AM. I cannot wait to get on it. Killadelphia, you never looked so good.

59 comments:

Ms Fit said...

Haa ha, enjoy it while you can. One of my nieces turns 18 tomorrow, my first niece and I'm asking myself how can the years go so fast?

Jody said...

Ahhhh.... The things we do for the people we love......You have just become the bestest uncle in the whole wide world to that little girl. And that is truly Field Negro behavior.

momo said...

I just had a similar conversation with another parent about our respective kid's adoration of Phantom of the Opera, a work that drives me insane with loathing, but that I patiently listened to multiple times, remembering that my mother never ever told me to turn off the music, but let me listen to whatever I wanted no matter how much it must have driven her crazy to hear me play the same record 15 times in a row.

LISA VAZQUEZ said...

Hey there Field!!

Awwww...that's so cute! You got a little taste of what it's like to have a little one in the mix huh??

Having children isn't as easy as it looked on The Cosby Show!!

*LOL*

As corny as it sounds, those memories will stay with a child for all of his/her life...it is amazing when I visit the elderly church folks in nursing homes and they reminisce about their summer months with Uncle Rudy at the fishing hole when they were little kids.

Those childhood memories when they were with their aunts and uncles and grandparents always remain so etched in their hearts.

PPR_Scribe said...

LOLOLOL! Hey, I am not even recovered from King's Island two weekends ago. I can only handle Disney and Universal every 4 years or so.

Just think of all the wonderful memories the children will now have--and you will always be a part of them!

Gregory said...

Field,

Remember that the term "Family Activity" derives from the Latin root meaning "Group Punishment".

ArtMaggot Hysteria said...

Be glad that you do not live near Disneyland and Universal Studios.
Enjoy the moment!

brohammas said...

My wife and I conspired at day one to shelter our child, show her lots of pictures of Hawaii, and tell her that these were in fact photos of Disneyland. We were doing great with this plan till mother-in-law moved in and ruined everything.
My dreams of family time on the north shore are now tainted with constant requests to say in Cinderellas astle and meet Mini.

Unknown said...

One thing about kids is that after you've spent all that money, remember how much fun they had, and see the pictures of them smiling, it's worth the new blisters on your feet and the now empty bank account. But if you want a little payback buy the most annoying sounding thing for her in the park, load her up with a bunch of sugar right before she goes back to her parents, give her the toy, and watch the fireworks.

Mr. Noface said...

Disney World is actually a really fun place! It's the children that bring the enjoyment levels down! LOL j/k

Mike Searches said...

I feel ya Field, fortunately, I am too damn broke at this time to take my six y/o to Disneyland. We're on the West Coast...I hope you didn't have to refi your home to afford it! Hey-off subject, I would love to put the dog crapping on the fox news logo on my blog, mikesearches. Can you help me out? Peace, Field...btw, after following the story of Samantha Orobator for weeks, it does make me grateful to be in the U.S., for all of its fuck-ups...

Saleema said...

awwww... sounds to me like your love your little neice a lot. How sweet. :)

vanishing point said...

sounds like you are having fun, hope you have a great flight back tomorrow, and thanks for the congressional medal of honor wishes:)).

Comrade PhysioProf said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!

TrueBlue said...

Hilarious! BTW, I am all in favor of theme parks. They help keep the screamin' rug rats away from my national parks. For similar reasons, I am all in favor of Texas and Oklahoma too. Well, sort of.

Lady-Cracker said...

Brohammas....

Pack up the camping gear and buy the bitty propanes and any other flamables in Hawaii and go camping there.

A little internet search will let you buy tickets and book spaces in the parks.

This is for those folks who want to actually sleep on the beach and wake up to dawn over the waves. You can always book the odd day in a hotel to showerup and get a drink with a little paper umbrella.

A great vacation to go jump in all the pools out to Hana and stay at Wainapanapa beach. Barbeque for dinner.

Anonymous said...

Field,
When my daughter was six, her dad and I took her to DW. She had the greatest time, we took pics, and we often talk about that wonderful two-day visit with M&M. Now that she is grown, with an seven-month old infant, she will, when her child reaches the Disney Appreciation Age, also take her child there. It's a generational trip. I wasn't too fond of going there -- I was thirty-one years old at the time, and her dad was thirty-three -- and I wasn't a big theme park kind of person, I'm glad I went. The memories are priceless. Needless to say, however, I've not been back there, but I can't say that I won't go back -- especially since I have a brand new granddaughter whom I might have to/want to? accompany on a trip to the Kingdom. Children, as you know, Field, change a lot in people's lives.

Anonymous said...

Dude, your mistake was taking her too young. Now you gonna have to go back when she is 8 or 9 and tall enough to actually do some of the fun stuff at the park. Look at this trip as a warm up.

And am I reading you right that you spent ONE day at Disney? What possessed you to go all the way to DW for a quickie?!?! All you saw was Small World! I hope you got over to Animal Kingdom, which is the only part of the world of Disney where you can find anything even vaguely Afrocentric. And I know what the weather is like in Philly, so you also missed out on a pretty decent water park.

You got to do at least three days at DW to have any chance of seeing even half of what that place has to offer. If you don't have to carry kids, you can do a park in half a day and they have five or six separate parks. And it's actually cheaper that way if you get some combo pass action going. You can go in and out of all the parks for a few days.

I am so glad my last is finally past the "go see Mickey" stage.

grinder said...

You got to do at least three days at DW to have any chance of seeing even half of what that place has to offer.<>

See what you have to look forward to, Field? Lord help you, Jesus!

Black Diaspora said...

@Field: "Are you having fun?" "Uncle Field this is the best fun I have ever had. Are we going to Toontown now? And are we going to see Nemo tomorrow?"

Just seeing the Joy on your niece's face would have been worth a million to me.

Field, I'll subsidize a part of the trip. Send your receipts to my secretary, Wanda Sykes, at 2012 Bill Cosby Drive, Suite 711 Hollywood, CA, 91100.

Your check is in the mail!

rikyrah said...

When you get back home, and look at the pictures, you will smile.

But, Disney is no joke. It's a moneymaking FIEND, and once you are down in Orlando, you are in the belly of the beast, and really just surrender.

PS-your niece will remember this trip FOREVER. All the details will fade away as she gets older, but the general feeling of this trip. The pictures? she will cherish always.

her and Uncle Field, and how safe she self in your arms as you carried her.

rikyrah said...

sorry..

how safe she FELT in your arms.

Ellen Kimball said...

Hello, Field --

Lucky me. I have avoided both Disneyland and Disney World for decades. Here's how I did it:

Husband and I went to Disney World once, when my mother and father in south Florida were driving us crazy.

It rained through our visit. I don't like the rides. My challenge is to stave off motion sickness on the ferris wheel or the merry-go-'round. I swore then and there NEVER to go to either place again.

The kids had kids. Now we're time share owners in Hawaii & Las Vegas. If we travel to Florida or California, I promise to do the cooking and laundry if they just let Grandma stay at the villa.

Those are the best days. Grandpa, our adult children and our grandkids are all at the ultra-expensive place of all child stupidity, while I am lounging in a hot tub or a pool with a good book.

:::smile::: don't tell anyone else about this or i will have to do something very bad...

Ellen K.

DuchessDee said...

Wait FN, when my husband & I first took our girls to Universal. We did all the screaming. Captn Marvel, Spiderman, Popeye & Olive Oyl. It was our smiling mugs in the photos with the characters.lol. We hit the parks with a full belly (you have to eat before you arrive or the park will eat you alive) and several frozen containers of water it was great.
Now sit back and enjoy it. How often can you relive your childhood.

Max Reddick said...

Perhaps I have never been happier than when my children outgrew Disney. We live about two hours away, and I or my wife have to travel there often on business, and for some reason, we always seemed to end up at Disney.

That is the biggest money pit ever.

Anonymous said...

I swear Disney will be the only thing standing in this country once we're all dead and gone. That place will always bring in the jack as long as they keep putting out cute 3-D movies every holiday season.

cdwriteme said...

LOL. I'm glad it wasn't me. It's like a big lab experiment to see how nasty consumerism can get. They probably have dozens of cconsumer psychologists, marketers, accountants, and public relations people on the payroll.

I saw on a show where there is some little uber-creepy town (a real town) actually inside the facility.

Antonio said...

Hey Field, I'm at Disney World right now too. I'm having a blast, but I don't have to deal with kids, just one friend who's crazy obsessed with Disney. It's great when you're an adult traveling with other adults. The consumerism does get on my nerves though.

Oh and how do you like all the red shirts you saw? ;)

grinder said...

Once you get home, Field, there is plenty more serious shit to talk about.

BNasty said...

Field,

That's what you get for not making the Obama run you promised!!!

Seriously, I was complaining to my son about not having the time (grad school) to take him ball games, vacation, etc. That I'm a bad father and all. He perked up and looked me in the eye and said,"Remember we went to Disneyland." Then he went back to playing vid games.

It might cost you a grip, but few things are worth the money. When and if you ever have a kid, I bet you will change your tune.

Safe flight Black man.

Anonymous said...

Field, stop being a whimp! You should be ashamed for letting a 4-year old handle those rides better than you. LOL. Well, at least you will be a little stronger when you get back to Killadelphia.

Way to hang in there, old man. Have a safe trip back.

GrannyStandingforTruth said...

Field:

I pray that your niece is having fun. And hurry back because Fox News is at it again when the guns aimed at folks head pictures again. Only this time it is aimed at Holder. Coincidence?

http://www.newshounds.us/2009/06/06/fox_nation_keeps_pointing_guns_at_prominent_black_people.php#more

GrannyStandingforTruth said...

*with* instead of when. Sorry about that.

Anonymous said...

You can always get an upset stomach, give them $500 and let them enjoy the day. Then you can have some peaceful time just u and your cmptr.

Anonymous said...

Granny after putting up with 400 years of Fox News we are still standing. It's how many we have too loose and how long it takes to get past this chapter and start the next fight.

God Bless You Granny

Black Diaspora said...

cdwriteme said... "They probably have dozens of cconsumer psychologists, marketers, accountants, and public relations people on the payroll."

It's the American way. You don't believe that you've made an independent decision for the better part of your life, do you?

We're manipulated almost from the time we're toddlers and we're sat in front of that electronic babysitter that we call a television.

Grocery stores do it, Ads on radio and television enthrone it, and you can see it in magazines, and newspapers, department stores, car dealerships--anywhere the hustle is on to separate you from your hard-earned money, or to persuade you to take a collective course of action.

Terms such as Homeland Security, and the
Patriot Act, take on a special resonance because they appeal to our inbred patriotic sentiments, and are coined carefully for their impact.

Consumerism is what drives our markets, and contributes in large part to the economic wealth of this country (our GNP).

The manufacturing sector has, in recent years, taken a big hit as we outsourced to China, and other countries, labor-intensive work that promised cheap goods at a reasonable and affordable price.

Wal-Mart once proudly proclaimed that most of the products it sold were "Made In America."

Not anymore.

Automobile manufacturing in this country may be the next victim, as it now struggles to stay alive on a federal government life-support system.

Our strength is also our weakness.
If we stop buying, as we have seen in the past year, we flirt with a recession and a possible depression.

I don't know how long we can pursue our current economic policies, and trends, before the whole shebang implodes, or we annihilate ourselves in an orgy of self-destructive behavior--global warming being the biggest threat on the horizon, with fossil fuels being, perhaps, one of the biggest culprits.

With Field's trip to Disney World, he probably singled-handedly rescued our ailing economy.

Attaboy Field! We owe you a debt of gratitude.

GrannyStandingforTruth said...

Black Diaspora:

Did you follow that link I just put up about the gun aimed at Holder?

GrannyStandingforTruth said...

These people are getting bolder and bolder with their hints at assassination. Homeland Security, DOJ, and Secret Service men need to pay them a visit. They caught and arrested that man who made the threat on the President. Thank you Jesus!

GrannyStandingforTruth said...

I pray that they all go to prison and they throw away the key.

Black Diaspora said...

@Granny: "Did you follow that link I just put up about the gun aimed at Holder?"

Yes I did, and thanks. I will be e-mailing my complaint to Fox, and sending my concerns to Holder, himself.

We have to do more than just complain. We all have to step up, like you, Granny, stay vigilant, and let those who violate the public trust know that we're on to them, and won't be hoodwinked by their efforts to bring harm to others--directly or indirectly.

We can put and end to this madness, but we have to wield our collective might.

One person alone can rally others of like mind, but he or she needs a public podium, and lots of exposure to make it work.

I will continue my crusade against this kind of attack against Obama and his family and other black officials, and won't rest until something is done to bring an end to this not so subtle appeal for some crazy to take up a weapon to do harm to the president and others in his administration.

GrannyStandingforTruth said...

John Zaubler Charged With Threatening To Kill Sotomayor

Now, here is another nutcase. Looks like the crazy folks is coming out of the woodpile left and right. Do you folks believe me now when I said that this is just like how "Black Wall Street" massacre started with some dangerous people on spouting out hatred in newspapers. Only these folks are using the airwaves to do incite assassinations toward prominent political figures who all are minorities, a Hispanic and two black men.

Homeland Security, DOJ, and the Secret Service men need to cut them off at the root and the root is Fox News, Rush, Hal, and the rest of the hate crew.

Black Diaspora said...

@Granny: "They caught and arrested that man who made the threat on the President. Thank you Jesus!"

I saw that the man was being sought, but I didn't hear that he had been caught.

Thanks for the update.

Many are praying for Obama and his family, I being one of them.

Obama's death at an assassins hand will rip this country apart. I got to believe that that is what some in this country wish to see--a civil war.

But that will be the end of this country as we know it, I'm afraid.

"...these folks are using the airwaves to do incite assassinations...." GSFT

Surely we have something on the books that they can throw at FoxNews and others that are doing this.

If Holder goes after them, you know what they'll say: "Reversed Racism," and use that as their new weapon to attack Obama.

GrannyStandingforTruth said...

Black Diaspora:

That reversed racism won't work. They've already tried that with Sotomayor's nomination. Every dirty trick they pull against President Obama will not work and will backfire on them.

They arrested Hal Turner who was another that was inciting violence against the President and other prominent politicians. The murder of Dr. Tiller has awaken the DOJ, Homeland Security, and Secret Service men from their slumber. They're taking all threats and inciting of assassinations serious. There will be an outcry and pressure from the people to do something about those folks at Fox and the rest of the hate crew. People are fed up with their mess.

God is not a man that he should be mocked, and whatsoever a man soweth, so shall he REAP!

GrannyStandingforTruth said...

BTW, forget mailing your complaint to Fox. Don't! It won't do any good. Instead e-mail DOJ and Homeland Security, and encourage others to do the same. Roger Ailes is behind a lot of this mess. He is a very hateful man and he hates President Obama to an extreme.

Anonymous said...

"Obama's death at an assassins hand will rip this country apart. I got to believe that that is what some in this country wish to see--a civil war."

Racism runs deep in America. It is quite profound and I don't think it will ever end.

Hatred of Blacks by some in America is as profound as the hatred Nazis had for the Jewish people during WWII.

Fox is America's media for promoting hate & assassinations. Hatred is the background cadence of their news. Now they are sending out signals to harm both AG Holder and Obama. It is obvious what they are 'conveying without saying'.

BTW, Fox wouldn't have top ratings if people weren't drawn to their hate.

A+

Anonymous said...

"The murder of Dr. Tiller has awaken the DOJ, Homeland Security, and Secret Service men from their slumber. They're taking all threats and inciting of assassinations serious."

Granny, if they have been asleep, then that is pretty scary. I would hope that they have been awake all along.

Anyway, have a nice Sunday.
A+

Black Diaspora said...

GrannyStandingforTruth said...
"BTW, forget mailing your complaint to Fox. Don't! It won't do any good. Instead e-mail DOJ and Homeland Security, and encourage others to do the same."

Will do, Granny. It would help if we had the thunder of numbers.

Black Diaspora said...

"Granny, if they have been asleep, then that is pretty scary." A+

A+, I've got to believe that the FBI was asleep. Roeder had been brought to their attention long before the killing of Tiller.

Roeder had attacked several clinics prior to the murder--attempting to glue shot their doors.

Why they didn't take a closer look at this guy is anyones guess.

Because they didn't, Dr. Tiller is dead.

Jazzy said...

Wow all that and you still have time and energy to blog....I'm impressed :)

SickupandFed said...

Raggy dee Ann said...

Haa ha, enjoy it while you can. One of my nieces turns 18 tomorrow, my first niece and I'm asking myself how can the years go so fast?


So So true.

I'm a bit jealous. Kids are such a joy. And they depend on us to light the way.

You are a light house.

Anonymous said...

Field, I'm loving this post!

You sound like my dad when he took us in 1977. I remember it clearly because we were on of the few black families at Disney World and folks looked at us like we were aliens. Elvis died and we spent a whole day in the hotel room watching reporters on tiny tv screen.

Anonymous said...

FIELD

STOP WHINING. ITS YOUR NIECE. LETS BE STRAIGHT THE WALKING AND LINES WERENT YOUR GRIPE. YOUR BIGGEST PROBLEM WITH DISNEY ARE THE PRICES. I KNOW U ARE IN TEARS RIGHT ABOUT NOW.

Bob said...

Now you know why the attempt of Southern Baptists to organize a boycott of Disney failed utterly. But you & Mrs. Field are a most excellent Uncle & Aunt.

Anonymous said...

lmao...too funny.

GrannyStandingforTruth said...

Sickandfedup:

Granny had to do a double take on your name. At first, I thought you were sickfreak and for a minute there I thought that sickfreak had been bornagain or something or other because of the compassion in your statement, which sickfreak, extremely, lacks. But then, when I looked again it was you and not sickfreak. LOL!

SagaciousHillbilly said...

Why do parents think they HAVE to take their kids to Disney World? Been lots of places and taken my kids to lots of places, but never been there and never intend to go. Frankly, I just don't get it.

field negro said...

Thank you, all of you, for your input and all your help in getting a brotha through this past weekend.

This is why I blog.

BTW, the little one thanks you too. She had a ball.:)

Uncle field is broke, but it was worth every penny.

Anonymous said...

Harvard Student Won't Graduate as Murder Investigation Continues
By The Buzz | Posted: June 3, 2009
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RELATED TAGS
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The Boston Globe is reporting that Chanequa Campbell, an honors student at Harvard by way of Bedford-Stuyvesant, Brooklyn, will not be allowed to graduate as an investigation into her involvement last month's murder of Justin Cosby, a Cambridge man, in her dormitory. Campbell for her part has maintained her innocence, saying she is the victim of harsh punishment by the school because she is poor and Black from a background that makes her an easy target. She says she did not know Cosby, a suspected drug dealer, and has no idea how he came to be in her dormitory. She also claims to be unaware of how Copney, the longtime boyfriend of her good friend Brittany Smith who did not himself attend Harvard, gained access to the dormitory and why he would commit the crime there.

Field have you seen this story? She would love to be at the most unhappiest place on earth right about now.

SickupandFed said...

SagaciousHillbilly said...

Funny meeting you here. LOL

Field, because of your site, I went and checked SH's out.

I am a Presiding Judge here in Cincy.Last November, I meet this lady lawyer who was posted outside my pollong place. Over the course of the day we converse, share doughnuts and beverages. I mention that I have a blog and she says, Have you ever heard of the Sagacious Hillbilly? When I tell her that I have, she informs me that he is her husband.

So It's your fault!

They are lovely people and I hope to see them again.

Thanks Field.

Granny,

I have been called a sick freak but I ain't him. I'm the REAL SickupandFed. Not that imposter that is holding onto the dot com.
Who knew I needed to register the screen name.

LOL