Tuesday, January 26, 2016

10 white people who used to be black.

In lieu of some white dude declaring that Stacey Dash is no longer black, not to mention all the racial confusion we had with folks like Rachel Dolezal earlier this year,  I have decided to publish a list of ten white people who used to be black.

1. Stacey Dash- This was a no-brainer. This washed up actress used to get roles primarily on Black Entertainment Television, and pose for pics in black male magazines. [see pic] But then she started getting older and less attractive, so she decided to become white, as she is quite aware that there are some white folks who will no doubt appreciate her for her intellect.   

2. Clarence Thomas- I know that this dude still looks black, but that's just an illusion. Believe me when I tell you, he is white. Or at least he really wishes that he was.

3. Don Lemon- This (former)Negro was born and raised in Louisiana, where they have the brown bag test. He passed it so much that he actually started believing that he was not a part of the folks who failed it.

4. Allen West- If you ask Allen he will tell you that he was never black in the the first place. He just has a really nice tan from living in Florida.

5. Pharrell- Hey, I love Pharrell too. But we have to let him go, people. 

6. Raven-Symoné- Raven started off as a black child star, but she stared getting whiter as she got older. The transformation is now complete.

7. Harris Faulkner- Girlfriend had me fooled for a minute. Not anymore.

8.  Ben Carson- There is no way a black man could get all those evangelicals from the Midwest to support him. I think Dr. Ben hypnotizes those poor old people with his voice. **I am white, I am white. ** 

9.  Amy Holmes-The networks like to bring on Amy to add some diversity to their lineups. The joke is on them.

10. O.J. Simpson-Wait, this is a mistake. My bad folks. O.J. was actually white for awhile, but apparently he is black again.

(Hmmm, I need at least one sports figure......)

Ok, I will go with Tiger Woods. Although something tells me that he will be black again real soon.

Pic from King Magazine. 

44 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hot DAMN, Stacey Dash is fine! Queen Shitstain and all the other "keepin' it real" sistaz out there only wish they looked as hot Ms. Dash.

It's those white genes, you know; a little splash of cream always make the coffee easier to swallow. ;)

Anonymous said...

I don't get it. Stacey isn't that great looking. Maybe she looked better at a younger age but her nose is too long and ugly.

Anonymous said...

10. O.J. Simpson-Wait, this is a mistake. My bad folks. O.J. was actually white for awhile, but apparently he is black again.

(Hmmm, I need at least one sports figure......)

Ok, I will go with Tiger Woods. Although something tells me that he will be black again real soon.

------------------------
ROFLMAO! This is really funny.

The Ministry of Truth said...

Can we go ahead and expel Allen West from the human race? I don't think Team White People really wants him any more than Team Black People does.

And no, this isn't a racist, "blacks don't count as people" kind of thing. This is an "Allen West is a loony freakshow" thing. His beliefs make no sense, and he has a haircut like Bart Simpson. (Also, he was kicked out of the military for torturing prisoners. So there's that, too.)

Someone please switch on his homing beacon and summon the mothership to return him to his home planet.

Anonymous said...

Brother Field, one can probably list every Negro in the black race as wanting to be White. Let's face it, brother no one wants to be Black, including you, PC, PX, and Yisheng. And I bet Lilac ain't crazy about it either.

So let's celebrate those Blacks like CT, Tiger Wood, OJ, Stacey, and Faulkner who have successfully gone White. Actually, that's a dream come true for most Blacks if they could make it work.

As a bm I'm thinking about passing too. Shit, it's dangerous and hard to be a bm in America. As I understand it, that's how the population of Whites is growing faster than any other race. In fact, it's growing so fast that it will remain the 'majority' for the next century.

What a disappointment to the Latinos this must be!

Anonymous said...

"5. Pharrell- Hey, I love Pharrell too. But we have to let him go, people"

Can somebody tell me what this is all about? Why is Field coming down on Pharrell?

Anonymous said...

There are some truly fucked up characters in this place.

Anonymous said...

Anyone here a fan of Radiohead?

Billy said...

Actually, I bet bitches like Yisheng and lilac crave white dick penetrating their pussies, their asses, their mouths...hell, maybe even their ears. They may have a kinky streak in them.

JC said...

Well, this place has proven that blacks can, indeed, be racist. I guess your white liberal masters were wrong about that, right?

Lance Cockstrong said...

I actually crave white dick from time to time. It's nourishing to the soul.

Anonymous said...

White dick rules. Every black girl wishes shehad some, but 99% of black girls are TOO UGLY.

Keepin' it real.

The Ministry of Truth said...

"Can somebody tell me what this is all about? Why is Field coming down on Pharrell?"

Maybe it was Pharrell's Oprah interview, in which he said things like this:

"The 'new black' doesn’t blame other races for our issues. The 'new black' dreams and realizes that it’s not a pigmentation; it’s a mentality. And it’s either going to work for you, or it’s going to work against you. And you’ve got to pick the side you’re gonna be on."

To a lot of people, that sounded like Pharrell was saying racism is completely over and done with and not a problem anymore. In which case, being "new black" apparently means you're qualified to go work at Fox News, since they're all post-racial over on that network.

PilotX said...

What about Mia Love or did she disappear? I haven't heard anything from her for a while. Can you do a well being check on her?

Josh said...

How to get a good laugh? Read the disowning of one's own race based on, by and large, ideology.

If you don't think like I do, you're not black!

Tell me, someone: Why is that supposedly the mentality of a field negro and not a house negro?

Not for nothing, but it seems to me that negroes in the actual field would have come together as a people under a common struggle (a real struggle; not your imagined slights in modern-day America that are self-imposed) and wouldn't have cared about someone's politics.

"Oh, I hears that there Lincoln is running for pres'dent. I loves that man; I surely does."

"OOOH..massa..did ya hear that? He be liking Lincoln, massa. He be doing it; I heard it myself. He ain't no kin of mine, massa. I's would never do that."

lol

Wouldn't the house negro be the one that fickle to demand ideological purity as to not upset massa and the situation while he's eating biscuits every morning?

You black-as-an-ideology lunatics are a laugh a minute.

"Oh, you vote Republican and work for Fox News? You're no longer 'black.'"

Maybe one day we'll have some shit from y'alls end that makes sense; e.g. you rob, rape and murder, you're no longer black. Or even you quit school and have babies you don't care for, you're no longer black. But never that. They'd be considered most black, I expect. Keepin' it real in a world of cooning-ass sellout, step 'n fetchin' Toms.

And then ask, "Why doesn't anyone care about us?"

Eeesh...yeah, I know I rant. But you have to see how fucking easy it is to rant away about all that's so, so wrong with this lunacy you people live with. And apparently function with it. Holy fucking shit! Talk about compartmentalization. I don't know about math or science, but black folks fucking PWN the world in that!

The Purple Cow said...

New opinion poll puts Trump ahead of his Republican rivals, largely because Republicans view him as “by far the most electable.”

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/as-first-voting-nears-trump-seems-stronger/2016/01/25/349439d4-c392-11e5-a4aa-f25866ba0dc6_story.html

Which of course flies directly in the face of reality that shows that the broader electorate hates him more than any other candidate.

http://fivethirtyeight.com/features/donald-trump-is-really-unpopular-with-general-election-voters/

Conservative cognitive dissonance on a mass scale.

Yīshēng said...

Probably need to add 90% of the Black Scientists I worked with in Pharma. Talk about a bunch of ass kissing uncle Toms and Aunt Tomasinas, ROTFL!!

Anonymous said...

Courtesy and respect of fellow colleagues isn't acting white, Yisheng. I predict you will be a failure in your field and in life with such a huge chip on your shoulder.

Joder La Resistencia said...

The Purple Cow said...
Which of course flies directly in the face of reality that shows that the broader electorate hates him more than any other candidate.

http://fivethirtyeight.com/features/donald-trump-is-really-unpopular-with-general-election-voters/

Conservative cognitive dissonance on a mass scale.


And yet every poll shows Donald J. Trump tied or leading Hillary with general election voters...

Joder La Resistencia said...

So if you leave the plantation you are no longer black?


Just more proof black people are monolithic.

The Purple Cow said...

Quote: The Right Has No Brains

Errrr, patently and demonstrably untrue.

Which you would have known if you had bothered to read the links I had provided, you dumb shit.

Again with the cognitive dissonance...

The Ministry of Truth said...

Today's wingnut update:

Worst governor in America Paul LePage says that he wants to bring back the guillotine to execute non-violent drug offenders.

Look out, Shifty and Lefty!

The Ministry of Truth said...

Today's wingnut update, part deux:

Up in Oregon, the FBI have killed one of the militia douchebags occupying the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge, and arrested eight other militia douchebags, including ringleader Ammon Bundy, charging them with a variety of federal offenses.

I am pleased to see the feds finally growing a spine. The authorities might as well get ugly and get it over with. This idiotic tantrum was never going to end well for the members of Y'all Qaeda.

Anonymous said...

Trump's unfavorable rating among potential voters is very high, especially among independents and Democrats. His ratings could change, but I don't see that happening based on his continued antics like boycotting a debate because he doesn't like a commentator.

Hillary will likely crush him in the general election unless Democrats stay home on voting day and new Republican voters come out in unprecedented numbers to vote for him. As a Republican, I wouldn't vote for him or Cruz for that matter. I'd rather have a lying crook in the White House than a nut. I'm sure I'm not alone in this thinking either.

field negro said...

Is Paul LePage on a mission to become the wackiest elected official in America?

I bet Josh would govern like LePage.


field negro said...

That wingnut in Oregon wanted to be a martyr.Let's see if he gets his wish.

Yīshēng said...

Not a martyr, but I'm sure he's burning in terrorist hell.

Yīshēng said...

BTW what did Pharrell do??

Joder La Resistencia said...

Unlike the gentle giant that was slain in Ferguson, Robert Finicum had his hands up when he was murdered by Obama's storm troopers. Of course the classless left cheers whenever a white person is killed in this country.

Anonymous said...

Blogger Yīshēng said...
BTW what did Pharrell do??

5:53 PM
------------
He did nothing. Field just threw him into the mix because, because...well there is no reason. That's why he won't answer.

Anonymous said...

Boobs

Anonymous said...

Beefcake

Anonymous said...

Poop nuggets

The Ministry of Truth said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
PilotX said...

Most racists want to execute brothas that get with white women. Why would LePage be any different?

PilotX said...

Blue tarp guy was talking much shit when interviewed. Was there any doubt this would end violently? My only problem is that they coddled these fools for so long. You have to make a point, if you take over property with weapons and threaten violence you get dealt with. If they were blah and unarmed I guess the national guard would have dropped napalm.

Anonymous said...

As opposed to brothas who just want to execute whites because they hate whites..

No country for white people said...

PilotX said...

. Was there any doubt this would end violently?

No. Because Obama hates white people. And Obama knows his supporters in the media and at home will cheer the deaths of whites.

Josh said...

I wouldn't govern, Field. I was asked to be hall monitor in 5th grade and turned it down after like 2 days. I was asked to run for class president in high school, I declined. I was penciled in by 17% of the Ashburn outlet at GWU to represent the student body and said no thank you.

I have never wanted, in my lifetime, to dictate to other people what to do. That's probably the number-one thing about religion that drove me to being a skeptic, the idea that one branch of one people using one book get to mold the world in their image.

I do not want to be governed over, and I do not want to govern others. To me, the entirety of life boils down to one "commandment": Do not bring harm to others. Other than that, do what the fuck you want.

I imagine if I were black I'd be among those considered no longer black by His Moldiness.

I ask you Field, legitimately, why nobody that murders other blacks or rapes other blacks or robs other blacks is on that list? Why is everyone on your list there solely because they disagree with your black-as-an-ideology self? Since when are race and politics supposed to be that joined? You mean to tell me that the thug in Chicago who killed that little boy is still "black" yet Stacey Dash has to go?

Some of you people have your priorities so fucking backward that white folks can't help but to be racist* as they think of you as unable to use your brains like everyone else.

*Racist by black-as-an-ideology standards, of course.

uptownsteve said...

Josh grunts

"You black-as-an-ideology lunatics are a laugh a minute."

Keep in mind folks that Josh is one white racist who never hesitates to express his disdain for guilt riddled "white liberals" who don't view blacks as predators, whiners, or and ingrates the way he does.

The reason why he is shrieking hysterically this morning is because we have attacked the only blacks that Josh feels are fit to be citizens in this US of A.

Hell, if we all thought like Clarence Thomas and Stacey Dash, Josh would be hard pressed to hate us so much.

Ain't that right Josh?

Anonymous said...

Josh wrote:

"I ask you Field, legitimately, why nobody that murders other blacks or rapes other blacks or robs other blacks is on that list? Why is everyone on your list there solely because they disagree with your black-as-an-ideology self? Since when are race and politics supposed to be that joined? You mean to tell me that the thug in Chicago who killed that little boy is still "black" yet Stacey Dash has to go?"



Amen, Josh. I don't understand Field's philosophy on race, either. People at his age who think like he does are a lost cause. Their minds are closed to the King dream:

"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character."

Bigotry isn't exclusive to one race, part of the country, gender, or political affiliation.

Josh said...

"we have attacked the only blacks that Josh feels are fit to be citizens in this US of A"

Well, according to Field, you haven't attacked "blacks" at all. They're not black. And since you're silent when Field says such shit, the only conclusion is that you agree with him wholeheartedly. You don't mind that he's a lunatic and omits so much in the stories and judges "black" people based on their ideologies and only their ideologies, disowning them entirely if they're not ideologically simpatico.

What have I ever said or done that insulting to black people?

You're a fucking joke of a man, Steve. Sixty-something, damn near a senior citizen, and acting like a little kid who just got a computer.

Unknown said...

Ewwww....I crave white pussy most of the time. It my own share of acres and a mule.

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