Showing posts with label Mark Sanford. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mark Sanford. Show all posts

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

The "hiking" excuse.


How many of you fellows who happen to have a significant other have to beg to get out of the house to play a round of golf with the fellows or hang out at happy hour? Don't act like it's just me, you all have to do it. You can't just pack up the golf clubs on a Sunday morning and say; honey I am off to the golf course, I will see you around six o clock tonight. Ain't happening.

Which brings me to my man Mark Sanford. Mr. Sanford happens to be the governor of the fine state of South Carolina. My man just up and went MIA on his family--- not to mention his state-- for four days. FOUR DAYS! Yep, seems he had been missing since Thursday. No phone call;no text; no letter. Just poof! The dude just vanished into thin air. Sort of. Now I would be the last person to tell a man that he shouldn't be able to go off and find himself, lord knows that it must be hard to be a republican governor in the age of Obama. But my goodness man; on Father's Day weekend? Doesn't this man have children? Shame on you Mark for abandoning your family without letting them know of your whereabouts. "Sanford’s wife, Jenny Sanford told the Press today that her husband Sanford needed some time away from his children in order to write something and thus he had gone somewhere for several days and even she do not have any idea that where he is now a days. No one knows where he has gone. Either the earth has swollen him or the sky has eaten him. We all wish to see him back safe and sound. " Mrs. Sanford may I suggest a Lo Jack. Mark, just be glad that you aren't married to a sister, because if you were, the state flags would be flying at half- staff right about now. And you sure couldn't use the hiking excuse. Field where the hell were you? Ahhh honey, I was out "hiking" with the fellows..... yes, I am sure you get the picture.

And speaking of the state; how could you do that to the citizens of your fine state, not to mention your number two man. " Lt. Gov. Andre Bauer (R), in a statement last night, said that his staff had been misled into believing that Sanford’s staff had spoken to him and knew of his whereabouts. “I cannot take lightly that his staff has not had communication with [Sanford] for more than four days,”

I wouldn't take that shit lightly either Mr. Bauer. But check the lines around that man's eyes, he could have been seeing one of those human body repair people if you know what I am saying. The man is, after all, getting ready for a presidential run. At least he was until he fooled around and did his best Ambrose Bierce impersonation for us.

But all is well that ends well. Daddy is home. And now the people of South Carolina and Mrs. Sanford can relax. Unfortunately for the GOP, it looks like yet another challenger to his O ness has fallen by the wayside.