So here I am on a crisp Sunday afternoon, going over some post trial briefs, and keeping one eye on some crime show on MSNBC. Then I hear the BREAKING NEWS ALERT, and I glance over to the tube. These alerts always get my attention, because in these volatile and perilous times in which we live, you just never know what might be coming next. So what was it? An Iraqi journalist threw both his shoes at my Commander in Chief. Both of them. (Are we sure we still have Richard Reid in custody?)
Now I don't want to pile on the frat boy, lord knows he has been subjected to enough obloquy and derision. But there was the clip over and over again. The frat boy with that little irritating smirk of his, yucking it up with the Iraqi Premier, and taking questions from the journalist present in the room. And then, shockingly, there is the man doing his best Pedro Martinez imitation with his size tens.
Now my first thought was that the frat boy was pretty nimble on his feet, and he showed some good moves to avoid the first shoe. (The guy should have been a boxer. I bet he would have been a better boxer than he was President) The second shoe was going to miss no matter what because It was high and away. (Ball one strike one) And of course my next thought was, where the hell is the Secret Service? They guy got off two shoes before they could take him down. What if he was firing bullets instead of shoes? And what if those shoes were bombs instead of Iraqi Adams or whatever the hell they wear in Iraq? ("Iraqi Adams", get it?). Hey, let's just be glad that Shaq is on our side. Anywho, I really shouldn't be making light of this, it could have been a seriously tragic event in our nation's history. It could have triggered a war....wait, we are already at war with the Iraqis. Okay, but it could have been a serious historic event, nevertheless.
Obama let that be a lesson to you, you better start calling on those FOX reporters. You don't want them pretending they are Iraqi journalist on you all of a sudden. Who are we going to send to cover the Obama news conference today? How about old Major Garrett, I hear he has a pretty mean fastball. Besides, he wears size 12 shoes, there is no way he can miss.... But don't worry O man, I have a suggestion: all members of the press must remove their shoes before going into the White House press briefings. If they don't want to comply, they don't get credentialed. It's that simple.
Still, even though the shoes missed, this is yet another sad day in what is fast becoming one of the worst and saddest administration in the history of our democracy. Just think about it for a minute: Our President suffered the indignity and the affront of having a journalist from a country he claims he liberated throw his shoes at him. And while in a formal press conference no less. You can't make this stuff up. And if you did, you would have a hit movie or novel on your hands.
Poor frat boy. Honestly, I am actually starting to feel sorry for the guy.
Now I know I am getting old.