Thursday, December 25, 2014

I sure hope that y'all been nice.





98 comments:

Anonymous said...

Brother Field, what's with the Black Santa? FN is the only blog that has a Black Santa.

Obviously, you do not know that Santa is White...Megyn Kelly made that clear months ago.

You've always gone against the grain of society, even on XMAS. You are most fortunate that slavery and Jim Crow has been outlawed because back then the KKK would be coming for your black ass. You must think you are Django or somebody.

Anyway, MERRY XMAS. I am sure you did not see a Black Santa, though.

PS. Don't forget Anon Inc. XMAS is one day, but you owe them money for a year.

Anonymous said...

@Anon 8:52
Do you think you can take a break for just one day?

Meanwhile for the rest of the world.
Peace on Earth, good will to all mankind. I hope the very best for each and everyone who comes to this place. Have a blessed holiday.

QLB

Faith_and_Fairness said...

Thank you, QLB... And wishing Mr. Field, fellow bloggers and your loved ones a Christmas and holiday that reminds each of us the true reason for the season... "And they called him 'Emmanuel' - the God of Peace, bringing much needed light to our nation and world. Enjoy the day!!

lilacpr2000 said...

Santa said that I was good but that when I was bad I was better!

I wonder what he meant ???

I made Santa special cake and he ate it all up, yup the whole thing :)

Lollipops and cake, fun times!

Santa is so gooood!

Faith_and_Fairness said...

LOL the Black Santa saying "I sure hope that y'all been nice."

Yes'm, Santa, we chil'ren will play real nice in sandbox today :-)

Faith_and_Fairness said...

Don't be coy, Lila... Me thinks you really know what Santa meant. With the delicious cakes, I'm sure it's all good :-)

Heather said...

Merry Christmas, Field! I hope you and your family have a very nice day. :)

lilacpr2000 said...

:) Faith, Truth be told Santa has been super good to me this year!!! In more ways than one!

Blessings and much happiness and peace to all on the blog!

Anonymous said...

Santa (St. Nicholas) may have been Moorish, therefore dark skinned. Many early icons seem to reflect this. I've been to his tomb in Bari, Italy. His remains were brought there from Turkey after his death. But I'm careful never to mention in front of any children that I've been to Santa's grave.

lilacpr2000 said...

Whaat? Santa's dead?

so who the hell did I spend the night with then??? OO

Anonymous said...

Santa lives at the North Pole. He's neighbors with Superman. Last year, they had a dispute over the placement of a new fence on the edge of Santa's property. There being no HOA to settle the matter, things got ugly. Santa came out one morning and found poor Rudolf burned to a crisp, clearly from laser vision. Then, Superman awoke one morning to find a stocking full of kryptonite next to his bed. After that, it was all out war. By the time the two were finished using their super powers against each other, the whole place was a smoldering ruin. Last anyone saw of them, they were adrift on an iceberg drinking whisky and crying.

Anonymous said...

Lilac, we all knows you ain't had no hot, lovin' relations 'cept with yourself.

Mr. Jingeling said...

There used to be black Santas, but they stood out too much against the snow and got eaten by polar bears. Only the white Santas survived.

It's true.

Merry Christmas!

lilacpr2000 said...

Hahaha, don't remind me @ 12:34pm.

well but then again, that's as far as you know, and as far as I tell, so glad to hear though that you believe every single little thing that I say ;D But remember, I have been known to lie here and there...jes sayin...:)

"Santa and Superman drifting away on an iceberg,drinking whiskey and crying??"

Noooooooo...then who the hell did I spend the night with???

He said he was Santaaaa!

lilacpr2000 said...

Mr. Jingeling 12:43pm, Black Santa got eaten by polar bears?????

Noooooooooooooo,oh my gosh! Then who the hell did I just spend the night with??????

He was black, and he had on Santa clothes! Well for a while anyway...

Anonymous said...

IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM ANON., INC.

Announced Strike by United Troll Union

The United Troll Union (UTU) has announced a strike for all blogs scheduled for Wednesday, December 31, 2014. However, Anon., Inc. is currently doing its utmost in order to be able to, despite the strike, supply Trolls to as many blogs as possible. Blog owners noticing a decline in comment volume are kindly requested to be patient as available Trolls are being equally and fairly assigned.

Blog owners of monetized blogs experiencing loss of income due to the strike will receive a credit for the month's charges. The following conditions have to apply:

- Proof of content loss must be submitted
- Loss must exceed 12.5% of average blog income
- Blog must have been in operation for at least Six Months

We will do everything in our power to inform and advise our blog owners to the best of our ability during this time.

Anonymous said...

The truth about Santa... See the evidence and decide...

http://themacchoi.blogspot.com/2012/12/santa-claus-was-alien-greatest.html

field negro said...

It's the birthday of Jesus and the Anon Inc. folks are still sending me notices. Lord. :(
What's a good Field Negro to.do?

Anyway, happy holidays to you all, and peace and goodwill to you and your families.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
Santa (St. Nicholas) may have been Moorish, therefore dark skinned. Many early icons seem to reflect this. I've been to his tomb in Bari, Italy. His remains were brought there from Turkey after his death. But I'm careful never to mention in front of any children that I've been to Santa's grave.

12:15 PM
------------
No, Santa WAS, and IS, WHITE..period. Obviously you Negroes have forgotten what Megyn Kelly said on FOX. At first, I was angry, then I realized that she was absolutely right. Blacks don't even know what a reindeer is all about.

Negroes are not good pet keepers as evidenced by Michael Vick.

Hell, even Field considers dogs and pets beneath his human status. I'd hate to be his pet.

Anonymous said...

Blogger field negro said...
It's the birthday of Jesus and the Anon Inc. folks are still sending me notices. Lord. :(
What's a good Field Negro to.do?

Anyway, happy holidays to you all, and peace and goodwill to you and your families.

1:20 PM
-------------
We also sent you a XMAS card. True there was a bill inside the card, but it's the thought that counts.

Mr. Field, you have one week to pay up.

Anon Inc, Collections Department

PS: Mr Field, we are a "Collections Department" of Anon Inc....We don't believe in Xmas, Santa, or 'being nice'. We want our effing money!

Anonymous said...

1:21pm, you clearly have no understanding of what a Moor is. Santa was Moorish and had dark skin. Megyn Kelly has that 'Village of the Damned' look and is clearly the progeny of a Nazi Eugenics experiment and cannot be trusted. In some parts of Africa, dog fighting is still a time-honored sport. Just visit Somalia. You can bet on the dogs and then enjoy a dog BBQ after the fights. Add a cold beer to that and you've had a fun day.

Anonymous said...

One more thing 1:21pm, without dog fighting, Somalia would descend into absolute chaos. Without this entertainment, they would just spend all their time firing AK-47's randomly into the air and making that funny Muslim sound with their tongues. Thank God for dog fighting.

lilacpr2000 said...

@Anon 1:09, you mean it could have been all a dream???

NOOOooooooooooo! You lie!

Santa is alive , (very much so ;) and well, and he gave me his number cos he also makes visits on call. So there!!!

He is not on an ice floe or eaten by polar bears, or an alien, (well, he might be an alien with those powers wow!) But He is as real as can be! I just called him and he said _"now honey, did that seem like a dream to you?, and hon,I'm as alive as can be, I will bring you more presents soon"

You're just making up stories about something as wonderful as Santa!









Anonymous said...


Lilac... Read on...

Each year around this time the Governments of the United States and Canada as well as many other countries around the world receive numerous sightings of a flying sleigh and reindeer supposedly piloted by a large, bearded man of considerable age in a red exposure suit. These sightings, called Global Santa Events (GSE), have been correlated around the world, except now in Ukraine which is currently a no fly zone. Unlike the relatively recent arrival of flying discs and other UFO type sightings, the flying sleigh, reindeer and Santa seem to date back well before this century. The U.S Air Force prepared a report in 1969, Project Red Suit, which looked at the geography behind these events and suggested some ideas about the advanced technologies Santa is obviously involved with during these seasonal encounters with particular populations on the Earth.

Anonymous said...

Listen, Santa is a grown man who owns every toy on the market, gives gifts and candy to kids he doesn't know and invites them constantly to sit on his lap. His biography said he was a Catholic priest too. So I think we should all be very concerned at this point.

lilacpr2000 said...

Anon 2:01 pm:

You may have something there,I do remember some whirring sound on my roof, and after that...hmmmmm...

Anonymous said...

I kind of like the idea of a black Santa. The white Santa is ok, but he's a little uptight about delivering presents on time and keeping track of bad kids.

A black Santa you could hang out with. It might be December 24th and he will up and say "Shit! I'm taking tomorrow off. It's Christmas and I gots a little baggy."

field negro said...

Safe to say that Lilac has been naughty this year. :)

Anonymous said...

Mr. Negro, it sounds like Santa gave Lilac his whole package.

lilacpr2000 said...

Santa said that I was very naughty but that in my case he approved,in fact he preferred it! So go figure!
Everything is relative I guess ;p

He had a package alight..er..I mean he had a sack full f toys too! These were for the a...never mind...

*sigh* I can't wait for the next holiday

Anonymous said...

Santa's sleigh runs on a Resonance Engine designed to increase amplitude as damping decreases and frequency approaches resonant frequency of a driven damped simple harmonic oscillator. The engine makes it possible for the sleigh to oscillate with greater amplitude at some frequencies than at others, achieving positive or negative lift coefficients. Frequencies at which the response amplitude is a relative maximum are known as the engine's resonant frequencies, or resonance frequencies. At these frequencies, even small periodic driving forces, such as reindeer movements, can produce large amplitude oscillations, because the system stores this vibrational energy.

Propulsion occurs when the engine is able to store and easily transfer energy between two or more different storage modes. However, there are some losses from cycle to cycle, called damping. Santa compensates for this loss of power by rubbing his nose.

Anonymous said...

Lilac, did you wake up cross-eyed and limping this morning?

Anonymous said...

Lilac, I think that explains why your neighbors heard "ho.......ho.....ho...ho...ho...ho..ho..ho.ho.ho.o.o.o.o.!..." Coming from your bedroom most of the night.

field negro said...

Ok, this thread is going into serious salacious territory.

Lilac, I apologize for the behavior of some of these Anons.
This is one of the reasons that I have not responded to their dunning notices. They have refused to give me some better quality posters.

lilacpr2000 said...

Thank you Field :) Ever the gentleman you!

Much love and best wishes for a Merry Christmas!

Anonymous said...

So Lilac's into fat guys. Now we know.

Anonymous said...

Field, "Lilac, I apologize for the behavior of some of these Anons.
This is one of the reasons that I have not responded to their dunning notices. They have refused to give me some better quality posters."

3:34 PM
------------------
Your excuse now is what is said to Lilac? GTFOH. Your account was in serious debt over 18 months ago. Before those days you had the finest Anons there was. Each Anon was 10 times better than PC, PX, Yisheng and yourself combined.

You still didn't pay then. You had a different excuse then. You probably spend hours trying to figure out the next excuse to NOT pay.

Since our in-house collection agency is not getting the job done I am turning your account over to Stormfront. And because you are Black they will collect pro-bono.

Anonymous said...

Bro. Field, it sounds like this Anon., Inc. Thing is getting serious. If you need cash, surely all of us here can chip in. Let's give the money to FocusedPurpose and she can write you a big check. We can trust her because she's a Preacher of the Gospel. They're always trustworthy with money. Don't worry. Be calm. Open each Palm slowly. There will be bad days. But you'll be ok.

Anonymous said...

She a Barbie Girl in a Barbie World.
Life in plastic. It's fantastic.

Anonymous said...

NOTICE:

In attempt to offset the losses incurred by Anon., Inc. over your use of Troll services without payment, a third party entity, Will-to-Power, LLC, contracted by Anon.,Inc., will begin posting paid ads instead of Troll comments.

We deeply regret having to take such action. Please be assured that the ads will cease and all Troll services will be restored upon prompt payment of all debts to Anon., Inc. At that time, it will be our pleasure to retain you as a paying customer in good standing.

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Anonymous said...

NOTICE

An unnamed party has paid your outstanding debt to Anon., Inc. in full. Regular Trolling services will be resumed immediately.

Anonymous said...

Dear Mr. Negro,

I have taken this occasion, the occasion of this the Day of Our Lord's birth to show my gratitude by relieving you of the debt you owed to Anon., Inc. I anticipate taking ownership of that company very soon.

I give you this gift as a favor with the understanding that I may call upon you for a favor sometime in the future as is our tradition in Sicilia among the old families.

Your new friend,

Giuseppe.

Palermo, Sicilia

Anonymous said...

I'm not a robot!

Anonymous said...

THIS DAY IN HISTORY

On Christmas Day in 1869, Old Jedediah Smith of Lebanon, Tennessee thought to himself, "Gee wilikers, I could sure make a ton of money peddling our nasty Tennessee cuisine to unsuspecting Yankee travelers. They seemed to like it when they were down here shootin' up the place. Maybe I could also sell them cheap banjos or scented candles." Thus the first Cracker Barrel, intentionally given a racist name, was opened along what would one day become Interstate 40, selling food that was marketed as "wholesome" and "family-friendly."

Jedidiah expanded his new company over the next few years and opened up new locations all across Tennessee. Most Tennesseans stayed far away from these Cracker Barrels as they understood quite clearly that the food served there was of an even lower quality than the already pitiful food they cooked and ate at home. Vacationers from the northern states however loved the novelty of the "wholesome southern cooking," that is, until they got reacquainted with their meal three hours later.

Cracker Barrel's food became the fixation of the early Progressive Movement after the food caused the deaths of three children in 1875. Then, there was a big storm and the newspapers dropped the whole thing.

Anonymous said...

Comment #50

Anonymous said...

Comment #51

field negro said...

Thank you Giuseppe, but I will pay off my own debt. I am sure you mean well but I do not want to owe a favor to a made man.

Anonymous said...

Dear Mr. Negro,

What did I do to deserve this disrespect? I see my kindness has failed to earn your gratitude. I refer the matter to my Consigliere.

Your new friend,

Giuseppe.

Palermo, Sicilia

Anonymous said...

"How do you know you're flying over Poland? You see the toilet paper hanging on the clotheslines."

Archie Bunker

Anonymous said...

Blogger field negro said...
Thank you Giuseppe, but I will pay off my own debt. I am sure you mean well but I do not want to owe a favor to a made man.

7:17 PM
----------
Whoa! I see you have a new friend from Sicily. Holy shit!

Anonymous said...

BREAKING NEWS...

Ukraine announced plans to open Chernobyl, their nuclear disaster site, to tourists. They say it's just like Disneyland, except the 6-foot mouse is real.

Anonymous said...

I miss the ads on this thread.

Anonymous said...

How do you know if a Pole is at a cockfight?
He's the one with a duck.
How do you know if an Italian is there?
He bets on the duck.
How do you know if the Mafia is there?
The duck wins.

Anonymous said...

How often should you clean your pole?

This depends heavily on how intensively you’re using it, but usually I’d suggest cleaning the pole once before you start, again mid-workout, and finally giving it a good wipe down at the end of your session. I typically wipe down the poles every 20 minutes.

Stop your pole getting mucky

There are a few things you can do to help keep your pole cleaner for longer, though most of the answers aren’t quick fixes unfortunately.

Practice makes perfect – If you’re just starting to work with your pole you will probably leave quite a bit more residue behind because of over-gripping the pole. This is a perfectly normal response, and as you become more comfortable and confident with your pole your grip will naturally loosen.
Don’t sweat it – Sweating can make the pole mucky and slippery more quickly, as the day’s grease and grime released by your pores sticks to the pole. And if you get sweaty hands at the same time this will just compound the problem. There’s no perfect answer, but the best advice is often to take a short break before coming back relaxed and ready to nail it!
Lubricants – Some pole aids work by coating your hands with slick oily layer. If you find this rubs off excessively on your pole, try working your pole without or experiment with one of the other products available.
You can leave your gloves on – Less skin contact usually means less dirt on your pole. Wearing a nice pair of gloves will not only keep your pole cleaner for longer, but also give you some enjoyable extra texture too.

PilotX:Freeing slaves from the Republican plantation since the 70's said...

Just landed in philly. Hope the 25th has something going on, Chinese takeout maybe? Hope you and the wife had a good holiday.

Anonymous said...

You only have one pole. Give it the care it deserves and you may not be the only one to benefit – your pole partner will probably be grateful too. Gently wash your pole with warm water each day. If you have a cover, pull it back gently and wash underneath.If you don't wash underneath the cover correctly, a cheesy-looking substance may begin to gather.It is a lubricant that keeps the pole moist. If too much builds up, it can start to smell, stop you easily pulling your cover back and become a breeding ground for bacteria.

Anonymous said...

Hey PilotX!

Merry Xmas!

What's the difference between a Flight Attendant and a Jet Engine? When the plane lands, the engine stops whining.

Anonymous said...

Mr Field, I am very disappointed that you have not mentioned the movie, "The Interview" with two of the greatest actors of all time.

My question is 'why' haven't you given this movie the attention it deserves?

Is it because the actors are White? Are you and your FN fans really planning on the same attitude toward non-violent Whites with an angry black attitude?

You should take cues from your PR friends like Lilac who is compassionate and has NO prejudices whatsoever toward Whites. Her comments toward Kinky proves it.

Now That's the way to live in the world...the way loving peaceful unbiased PRs do in the world.

Anonymous said...

10:36pm, sounds like you're just looking for a bone to pick with Mr. Field. Do you expect him to have time to comment on everything? It's Christmas. He's probably with his family.

Listen, pal. He let's us come here and say whatever we want, trash each other, masquerade as racists, perverts, Chinese business men, and members of the Mafia, do bad stand-up and tell bad jokes. He doesn't ban us or even scold us. The man is just plane cool. Show him the respect. I'm his number one Troll and I love the man. He's the best blogger I've seen.

I think you owe him an apology.

PilotX:Freeing slaves from the Republican plantation since the 70's said...

Wash my pole? No way, it'll get wet! (In my Beavis voice).

Merry Christmas said...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WkqZbFQb0O0&list=PL8A09034D7D9BE695

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_jIYyPOoEc8

PilotX:Freeing slaves from the Republican plantation since the 70's said...

Anon @9:58, I thought the joke was a jet engine and a United pilot. Ha!

Anonymous said...

PilotX,

I just have one question. Why do the seats on airliners double as floatation devices when they should double as parachutes?

Anonymous said...

I suppose that if I had it to do over I would have been an airplane pilot, because at random points during the flight I could just go on the intercom and scream.

Anonymous said...

Bing...

"Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants."

Anonymous said...

Listen, pal. He let's us come here and say whatever we want, trash each other, masquerade as racists, perverts, Chinese business men, and members of the Mafia, do bad stand-up and tell bad jokes. He doesn't ban us or even scold us. The man is just plane cool. Show him the respect. I'm his number one Troll and I love the man. He's the best blogger I've seen.

I think you owe him an apology.

10:45 PM
--------------
Masquerade as a racist troll? you are his #1 troll? I doubt that. You might be the #1 racist on FN which means you sure as hell don't love Field, or anybody on this predominantly black blog called "Field Negro".

You come to insult, torture, degrade and demean Blacks because of the color of their skin.

You are the typical holier than thou White who has the moral arrogance on XMAS to judge and criticize those who aren't acting like you.

Stop making a mockery of your 'White' XMAS. Racism doesn't give a damn about XMAS. In fact, most Whites hate Blacks just as much, if not more, on Xmas day as they do any other time of the year.

Therefore Mr #1 Troll, GO FUCK YOURSELF.

Anonymous said...

Dear 11:42pm, AKA #2 Troll,

You are in a terrible mood considering it's Christmas.

Anonymous said...

Mr. Troll #2,

If you like, then I will happily take you on as my apprentice. My first lesson regards your pole and its cleanliness. There are some very important steps to caring for your pole as well as regular features you should check in order to work your pole safely.

Pole accidents are scary - and definitely can be embarrassing and serious! Falling on your dirty pole or having someone else fall over when they are on it is not only terrifying but can result in lifelong injuries and dysfunction.

Under my training, you will find important information about pole care as well as specific information regarding using and caring for your pole including hand grip techniques.

Anonymous said...

Xmas is just another day...they don't stop killing bm because it's Dec 25.

Bong Crosby said...

May all your Christmases be white, buh buh buh bitches!

Anonymous said...

Bong Crosby, make sure you capitalize "White", bitch.

Anonymous said...

Troll #2, you may doubt you need an instructor. But heed my words. My point is that in nearly 46 years of training with my pole, and over 39 years of teaching the art I have never met or heard of anyone self trained in using his own pole who was worth bothering with. If you are going to receive proper training from a qualified pole instructor, then good luck with your training. If you are going to try to re-invent the wheel, then you are only going to fool yourself into believing that you can use your pole well. Perhaps a few unskilled people might be impressed. But if you should try to do it in front of anyone that knows how to really work the pole, they will either ignore you, or make you look like the fool that you have become. I'm do not mean to be harsh. But as your master I must speak the truth.

Anonymous said...

Well, I had a good workout, my pole is clean. I guess I'll go to bed. GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY!!!

focusedpurpose said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
PilotX:Freeing slaves from the Republican plantation since the 70's said...

UMOJA!

Anonymous said...

Does anyone know what PX is mumbling about? Man, that guy has some major problems.

Anonymous said...

PilotX is the Man! He fly the friendly sky in a champaign Cadillac. When he touch down the ground kiss him. I say hey, sky... subba say I wan' see...

Anonymous said...

Dear Mr Field, don't you are over-doing it with the black Santa fantasy? Like XMAS trees it's time to take your black Santa down.

There is no black Santa anyway. You are just hoping to brainwash some unsuspecting Whites into believing there is a black Santa instead of a white Santa.

Well, Whites are too smart to fall for something like that. On the other hand, a whole lot of Blacks would fall for it...all the way to the islands like PR and VI.

It's a damn shame.

Anonymous said...

I saw Anon Inc on Capitol Hill today, apparently desperately looking for a Congressman to talk to about FN blog. Fortunately for you there were no congressmen to be found.

Security told Anon to come back next year after the President's speech, which, they added, will be one hell of a speech. It's guaranteed to change America.

BTW, I ran into UTS while there. He was briskly raking leaves....that man can really rake leaves.

Anonymous said...

3:14pm, you don't know anything. Brother Field is tight on. Early icons of St. Nicholas show him to have very dark skin. Just look it up if you don't believe. White people made Santa white. They whitefied Jesus too. Everyone has to be white!

Anonymous said...

All I do, the church keep a-grumbling
All I do, Lord, all I do
All I do, the church keep a-grumbling
All I do, I do, I do
Yes, all I do, Lord, all I do
All I do, all I do

Try my best for to serve my Master
Try my best for to serve the lord
Try my best for to serve my Master
Hallelujah

Try my best for to follow my Leader
Try my best for to serve the Lord
Try my best for to follow my Leader
Hallelujah

Kneel and pray, so the devil won’t harm me
Try my best for to serve the lord
Kneel and pray, so the devil won’t harm me
Hallelujah

I’m going to cling to the ship of Zion
Try my bet for to serve the Lord
I’m going to cling to the ship of Zion
Hallelujah

Anonymous said...

3:22, in a hundred more years they will make MLK white too.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...
3:14pm, you don't know anything. Brother Field is tight on. Early icons of St. Nicholas show him to have very dark skin. Just look it up if you don't believe. White people made Santa white. They whitefied Jesus too. Everyone has to be white!

3:22 PM
------------
When I was a kid, Santa was White just like Megyn Kelly said. So why would I want to change that? All good things are White, that's a fact.

You might call me uncle tom, but I face reality and accept the truth of where America is today.

Santa and Christ will never be Black in America. In addition, in years to come MLK will be made a Republican and lover of Whites and disappointed with Blacks.

Anonymous said...

Listen to me Anon. 3:44,

If you'd ever been to Kentucky, then you'd know about wax pole beans. They're a type of wanker bean with waxy, smegma-like yellow-golden pods measuring 6 to 8 inches in length. Although the wax pole beans are well suited for container growing, the number of plants per pot and the amount of pot per room is limited. However, pole beans are productive, groovy, space-efficient plants that grow until the first frost in autumn, producing double or triple the harvest of bush beans planted in the same space. With careful planning and a well concealed, lighted location, you can plant 15 to 20 wax pole bean plants in a pot -- enough to keep a you supplied with all the wax pole you can handle.

I guarantee you Megyn Kelly has some wax pole every night! So there!

Anonymous said...

You are being very disrespectful to Megyn Kelly who is so honest that she is beyond reproach. You have just made a very grave sin.

Anonymous said...

Anon. 4:22,

I have nothing in common with Megyn. She is blonde and does easy work at a desk. Being a small-built Asian lady with tiny hands makes my work hard. Many of the hard pole working jobs are difficult and very hard on my hands. Yet people expect a lot from me because I'm Asian. So I started using a product called Grip Lite. It improved my grip tremendously and soon I started achieving one big happy performance after another. When I introduce Grip Lite to others, they are often afraid of being too dependent on it, really addicted to it, so much so that they won't be able to perform without it. But, I learned that by using a grip aid, I will slowly gain sufficient strength to please my public every time. See if Blondey can do what I do. She no have strength.

Anonymous said...

I feel very comfortable here because Mr. Field is kind and makes everybody feel very welcome on his nice blog regardless of race. He makes relevant issues known too. This is especially important to me because, up until now, I've been used to being thrown off blogs. Most blogs aren't friendly to me. I don't know why. But this one is the best EVER (happy head roll)! I guess that was because I always say weird stuff.

But, for me, being weird isn't much of a choice. You see, I got off to a very rough start in life. You might say I was naturally weird from day one. I was born in 1974 without arms and legs in rural Kentucky to alcoholic parents who were, shamefully, brother and sister. They made me live in the barn and made my older sister feed me when she fed the animals. Nobody outside the family even knew I'd been born. I didn't even have a birth certificate. Finally, a vacuum cleaner salesman discovered me in the barn. Then, the state intervened and I ended up in an institution in Connecticut. This was partially because I was of scientific interest in the area of DNA research that was just starting to blossom in the 1980's. I also have certain vestigial traits they wanted to study. So my downfall was also my salvation.

It was here I first saw the Information Superhighway. It was love at first sight. Early on, I just liked to look at pictures for hours. But that's frustrating when you don't have hands. I painstakingly learned to use a keyboard by using a stylus in my mouth. I eventually graduated to an iPad. I drool a lot. Yes. Yes. But my caregivers are kind to come by with a cloth to wipe off my screen. They seem to sense I'm doing very important work. But, I do my best thinking while being changed or fed or bathed. In fact, I never stop thinking. I'm basically a big brain in a small body.

Sure, I have some serious mental health issues, but you would too if you were raised in a barn. "Helping out" with discussions online is healthy for me according to my therapist. She said it "connects me to the real world." She told me this the last time she took me outside the grounds for a walk in my baby stroller. People on the sidewalk tend to jump when they see me in that thing. I guess they expect to see a baby, not a balding 40 year old guy with a mustache and no limbs.

So, as you see, I'm either strolling with my therapist or strolling with Mr. Field these days. He's my hero. I'm not used to being tolerated, anywhere. Most people throughout my life recoiled when they even looked at me as I have a lot of secretions and the odor that comes from having too much smegma. So being rejected is what became normal for me and it made me act out towards the so-called "normal" majority of people. I used to do a lot of spitting at these people before I found the Internet. That's one reason they refused when I asked to try chewing tobacco like the big league ball players used.

Maybe the Internet became my new way of spitting at people. But now things have changed because of Mr. Field. I hope everyone here appreciates his efforts. By the way, they call me "Tadpole" because I have no arms or legs (YET!). I never liked my real name because of who gave it to me. That's all I have to say for now.

Martin Luther Ming the Merciless said...

Anonymous said...
3:22, in a hundred more years they will make MLK white too.
--

They already made him Chinese - look at that statue.

After the Chinese have taken over for a century or two, they'll point to that statue and tell the story of how the Americans enslaved them until they rose up and took over the country.

Anonymous said...

Tadpole, we all love Brother Field.

Anonymous said...

"My Heart Is a Wiffle Ball/Freedom Pole"

I reared digital moonlight
You read its clock, scrawled neon across that black
Kismetly ... ubiquitously crest fallen
Thrown down to strafe your foothills
...I'll suck the bones pretty.
Your nature perforated the abrasive organ pumps
Spray painted everything known to man,
Stream rushed through and all out into
Something Whilst the crackling stare down sun snuck
Through our windows boarded up
He hit your flint face and it sparked.
And I bellowed and you parked
We reached Marfa.
One honest day up on this freedom pole
Devils not done digging
He's speaking in tongues all along the pan handle
And this pining erosion is getting dust in
My eyes
And I'm drunk on your morsels
And so I look down the line
Your every twitch hand drum salute
Salutes mine...

Anonymous said...

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.haey...haey...haeY ecnad ot sevol ybab ruoy ees uoY ecnahc rehtona deen I wohemos ti ekam annog m'I won yenom em tnes aP .lrig nomannic yM ,thgilnoom eht gnisahc ,rehtegot su ees uoY thgin eht ni nur I serutcip fo remaerd A .lrig nomannic sih roF swohs neewteb stiaw dna sexaler remmurd ehT wob a htiw ssab a

ledenn said...

Merry Christmas, Field. I surely appreciate your sharing views and opinions with us. You help make my world bigger and better informed. Wishing happiness to you and yours!

Anonymous said...

Your writings/posts are a refreshing read. I've shared them with others like I would share the work of other journalists/authors.

That said, I think you're on thin ice with your remark "We are, after all, talking about "Wyoming"

I hear those types of generalizations about my home town and state: Oakland, California all the time. Even though some of out elected officials also suffer from foot-in-mouth syndrome, you really can't hold it against an entire community, city, or state.

And Pennsylvania, rich cultural traditions that could never be trampled by a politician.