Frat boy you have had three years, do you think you can get it right this time?

As hurricane Gustav churns towards the "boot"; my thoughts, first and foremost, are with my friends, loved ones, and in laws. Those poor folks will be doing everything that they can to ride out this potentially devastating storm. Still, I can't help but think of the irony of the entire situation. (Maybe there is a god) Almost three years to the date after the frat boy and his incompetent administration fucked over the *residents of an entire city, his party has been forced to cut back on their coronation of Mr. Morton and the beauty queen.

Personally, I love it. Not the storm, but the fact that those assholes had to change their plans because of it. They just couldn't have the rest of the A-merry-can people thinking that they are heartless and uncaring, and that they are throwing a major party while the Big Easy takes yet another hit.

And now I hear that the frat boy, and his side kick (Dead Eye Dick) will be skipping the convention to "monitor" the situation. My question to the frat boy would be: why? A-merry-ca already considers you a an incompetent buffoon, and no matter how hard you try, you will never get us to get those images and your handling of Katrina out of our minds. I know you think this is your second chance to get it right, but it's not. You get no second chance, not after the way you fucked up your first one. "Brownie you are doing a heck of a job". Remember those infamous words frat boy? They will go down along with "Mission Accomplished" as words which will define your administration, and your presidency.

Folks, let's be clear, Katrina is what doomed this administration in the eyes of many A-merry-cans. A lot of people could live with the Iraq war, after all, countries do go to war. People like moi might not like it, but there are some folks who think it's necessary, and quite a few people in A-merry-ca were fine with Iraq. But not the handling of Katrina. The republicans were supposed to be the grown up party, the folks who could always be counted on to be competent. The democrats, on the other hand, are the ones with the great ideas, but they can never carry them out. Katrina changed all of that. It showed the rest of the country that republicans were just as incompetent and clueless when it comes to getting things done as the democrats were. It showed us that in spite of all of his rhetoric, the frat boy only cared about hooking up his incompetent ass friends. As a result, many of you started looking at the Iraq war from a totally different perspective. If this man couldn't take care of a crisis in our own back yard, how can we trust him to prosecute a trillion dollar war to influence foreign policy? The frat boy never recovered from Katrina, and even the clowns on FOX were forced to acknowledge that he blew it.

Now, almost three years later, as we count down the days for this human version of Katrina to leave office, we are faced with yet another storm. It's as if god is saying; I am going to give you one more hit frat boy, because you fucked up the first one so bad. And for good measure, I am going to bring it right in the middle of your parties' convention. Let's see all those praying folks pray their way out of this one. I know they were praying for the rain to hit Obama on his big night, but I had some different plans.

Anyway, let's keep the folks on the Gulf Coast in our thoughts. And let's hope that they ride this one out without any loss of life or serious injuries.

As for the folks up in St. Paul; I wish them all a safe trip home.......

*Thanks for the correction Liz :)

Now it's a real beauty contest.

"The longer I think about it, the less well this selection sits with me. And I increasingly doubt that it will prove good politics. The Palin choice looks cynical. The wires are showing.
John McCain wanted a woman: good.

He wanted to keep conservatives and pro-lifers happy: naturally. He wanted someone who looked young and dynamic: smart. And he discovered that he could not reconcile all these imperatives with the stated goal of finding a running mate qualified to assume the duties of the presidency "on day one."

Sarah Palin may well have concealed inner reservoirs of greatness. I hope so! But I'd guess that John McCain does not have a much better sense of who she is, what she believes, and the extent of her abilities than my enthusiastic friends over at the Corner. It's a wild gamble, undertaken by our oldest ever first-time candidate for president in hopes of changing the board of this election campaign. Maybe it will work. But maybe (and at least as likely) it will reinforce a theme that I'd be pounding home if I were the Obama campaign: that it's John McCain for all his white hair who represents the risky choice, while it is Barack Obama who offers cautious, steady, predictable governance.

Here's I fear the worst harm that may be done by this selection. The McCain campaign's slogan is "country first." It's a good slogan, and it aptly describes John McCain, one of the most self-sacrificing, gallant, and honorable men ever to seek the presidency.
But question: If it were your decision, and you were putting your country first, would you put an untested small-town mayor a heartbeat away from the presidency?..."

The writing above wasn't from some left wing democrat. It was from David Frum, darling of the neocon right, and former speech writer to rethuglican presidents. Frum was writing online for "The National Review", and he is obviously not a happy camper.

And you know what, I agree with him. I am sorry folks, but to paraphrase Frum, the more I think about this pick, the more I am thinking just how insane Mr. Morton must be. And for all the folks in this country writing on blogs, and pontificating in various media outlets about what a brilliant pick this is, I say to you with all due respect, that you must have lost your fucking minds. This pick was pure lunacy.

This woman wasn't even properly vetted for crying out loud. Right now we are hearing that she had a little scandal brewing up in Alaska, one which the rest of us down here in the lower forty eights were totally clueless about.

Now folks, you all know how I feel about this election; it is my humble opinion that his "O" ness will lose. Because no matter how good the illusion looks, A-merry-ca is not quite ready to elect a skinny Negro from the South side of Chicago, with an Arab name, president. But I will be damned if Mr. Morton didn't go ahead and give his "O" ness a fighting chance.

Maybe it's just me, but I would at least like the person who is a heart beat away from leading my country to be smarter, or as smart as I am. (She named her son "Trig" for god sake) Ahhh field, you are so arrogant and such a sexist asshole, how do you know that this woman is not smarter than you are? No fucking way! And that's not being arrogant, that's just a fact. I bet I forgot more foreign policy than she knows. Sexist? I don't think so. I don't, for instance, think that I am necessarily as smart as Hillary, or Condi for that matter. (Although I make better choices) But this lady? I am going to go out on a limb and say I have it over her in the brains department. AND SHE IS GOING TO BE THE VP? Folks, this makes the Dan Quayle pick look downright genius. And just in case you think I am a sexist; I want you to know that I think that he was a flat out idiot. And the last time I checked (well I didn't actually check), he is a man.

But hey, as they say in Hollywood, it's a wrap now.

My friends (I got that from Mr. Morton), wouldn't it be ironic if the woman who was runner up to the first African American to win Ms. Alaska, ends up losing to the first African American president of these divided states? I know, I know, one is a beauty contest, and the other is the presidency. But if you think about it, what's the difference?

Why?

I have never been to Alaska, and I am sure it's a beautiful state with wonderful people. But Mr. Morton, WTF? Sarah Palin? Here I was, ready to keep my clothes on come November and stay the hell off Broad Street, when you go and pull a stunt like this. You must really want me to lose my bet don't you? I am sorry, I must be missing something; if you are up in a football game with time running out, don't you call conservative plays and hold the ball? Why would you throw a hail Mary pass and risk giving the other team the ball? Mr. Morton, Sarah Palin is a fucking hail Mary pass, plain and simple.

I know I know, she is only 44, she is a woman, and she is a social conservative. So she has youth, gender, and conservative cred. All traits that I am sure you thought would help you. But being 44 and a two year Governor of a state that is closer to Moscow than New York, and less people than a Philly housing project isn't going to make the experience rap against his "O" nes fly. Being a woman isn't going to get her the Hillary vote (the one hundred or so folks at PUMA not withstanding), because the last time I checked the Hillaryites wanted to keep their right to do what they want to with their own bodies. And they sure as hell loved that their girl had a ton of experience; and they would have some serious issues with the former mayor of a town of 9,000 people just two years ago, rising to the second highest office in the country. The fact that she is a gun toting, gay hating lunatic, doesn't help her either. Yeah the stories of her background is cute, and I feel for her with the disabled child, but come on now....VP?

Hey, maybe Mr. Morton wanted his ticket to be able to beat the "O" man's ticket in B-ball. I hear that girlfriend actually hit the winning shot to win her high school team the Alaska state championship. ---I have seen your game "O" man, you can't go to your right, if girlfriend can shoot the jay you might have some problems. ---But seriously, Mr. Morton has really shuffled the deck here, and as someone who thinks he was a lock to win, I don't like it. He is forcing me into the gym more often than I want to go now (I will not be embarrassed running my naked middle aged ass down Broad street), and that's a problem.

I still can't figure this shit out. Why rock the boat and take chances when you didn't have to? Why not Tim, or Mitt, or Joe? Are the rethuglican ranks that thin? Hell, why not Elizabeth or Condi?

I don't know Mr. Morton, I always heard you were a little touched, but this confirms it. The thing is, A-merry-ca will still take a white woman over a black man every time, so this might not end up hurting you so much. Might not. But damn it man, did you have to make it any closer any needed than it needed to be?

Oh well folks, just in case, I am off to the gym. If anyone has the number of a really good personal trainer in the Philly area, please give the kid a call.

Negroes needed ASAP!!

"watching the RNC is so funny. Almost all the Black Republicans will be *on the stage* and they will zoom into the "other" guy in the audience 6 times a day, every day, like he's someone different. last time I was laughing hysterically by the second day. They keep showing the same 12 people of color over and over again like they are different people. From different angles, from different cameras but the same dozen non-white delegates."

I wish I could give the person who posted that funny little comment their proper credit. I saw it on one of those race forum boards. And I gotta say, it's dead on.

It should be fun watching the frat boy's Katrina Anniversary bash next week. And for the sake of the poor folks in the "Big Easy", I am hoping that we don't have a literal repeat of those sad events. You gotta believe the rethugs are praying too, but for a totally different reason. Field are you trying to say that republicans care more about how their convention comes off than the lives of poor black people? Ahhh let me think about that for a minute.....YES!

So anyhoo, it should be fun to watch the rethugs. If only to play our little game of spot the black guy. I know one thing, if you are a black person who loves face time, there will be no better place to be than in the Twin Cities next week. Look honey, it's that black guy again. He is everywhere.....You gotta love it.

I am going to try and count the black people, it should be easy. Although I am guessing that this year they might actually ship in more brown warm bodies than usual to diversify the crowd a little. They can't just have a total white out when the dems are looking so diverse at their convention; and when they nominated a black man for crying out loud! Now that I think about it; the "Rent A Negro" folks should be doing great business next week. Hi, Rent A Negro? Yes, this is Bob from the RNC. We are going to need at least fifty more Negroes for Wednesday night, do you think you can swing that? Oh, and Rent A Negro, we need them to have some acting skills as well. We want them to look really enthusiastic when those cameras are on.

Let me stop. I already catch enough flack from my rethug friends for being hard on them. But let's be honest folks, don't they make it easy for a brotha?

Change some of us can finally believe in.

"DENVER - When this campaign ends, after future presidents have come and gone, and when today's young people are grown old, history will remember Wednesday, Aug. 27, 2008, as the day a black man became the presidential nominee of a major party.
This is history with the ink still wet; transcendent, yet in your face now.
It's a history that belongs to the red states and the blue states and the United States... "

So says the Associated Press. And somewhere in Northern Virginia Robert E. Lee is turning in his grave.

We have come a long way haven't we? And to think, just a little over a hundred and forty five years ago, you could have bought someone that looked like Barack to till your land. Now he is just a few electoral college votes away from leading this bitch. It says a lot about these divided states that we live in. It says a lot about our potential as a people and a nation.

I know I am very cynical when it comes to the racial attitudes of the A-merry-can people, but the truth of the matter is that not all A-merry-cans deserve my cynicism. Some of you are really decent people who really want to see this country rise above its differences and meaningless prejudices. Some of you. I am guessing maybe 70% of my melanin challenged friends fall into this category. The other 30% of you...well, hopefully, you are all very old.

And then of course, as is always the case, things aren't always so black and white (no pun intended). Oh oh here comes field with some negativity. Nope, no negativity here. Just reality.

The reality is, that his "O" ness isn't stained by the legacy of slavery; his mama was white and his daddy was African. His ancestors weren't brought to A-merry-ca against their free will, and there are quite a few folks in A-merry-ca who feel that this works to Barack's advantage. He is not angry like the rest of you black A-merry-cans, because his ancestors weren't wronged. The people in the majority can accept him because there is no guilt. His rhetoric is that of reconciliation, and healing. Forget the forty acres and a mule, just give me the white house, and the symbolism of that act alone will make your conscience free, whitey.

At the end of the day Barack looks more like me than the average A-merry-can, so having him in the White House would have given the rest of the folks who look like me a sense of pride at knowing that one of us finally has a chance to run the ship. I honestly don't think that there is a thinking black person in A-merry-ca who believes that Barack will be the answer to their problems. If he were to be elected (and that's a big if), the bills would still be due, there would still be a great chance of getting shot walking to the corner store, and you would still have to get a fucking passport to go a grocery store where you can get fresh meat and fruits. The schools will more than likely still under perform, the criminal justice system will still be imbalanced, and special interests groups like the murderers at the NRA, will still control Washington.

But one of us will be on television everyday holding those White House press briefings and telling us that everything will be alright. The A-merry-ca we love and cherish will not succumb to the culture of corruption in Washington, and the checks and balances that are in place will protect all of us, and not just the wealthy and connected. Hearing that from him will have a different meaning to many of the folks who look like me, it will be more believable. And at the end of the day, that's all black folks want, a chance to believe in something. They have found there reason to believe, now they are just hoping that enough of you A-merry-cans feel the same way.

Yes we can. But can you?

These should be the only damn PUMAS we are talking about.

Okay you Clintonistas, it's time to stop the madness. I got the following piece of crap again from that clown, Carolyn Kay, and I think I will have to tell her to remove my name from her mailing list......scrap that, I think I want to keep seeing the kind of crap that she and her crew keeps sending out. After all, how else would I know that shit like this is still going on? Honestly, at first I thought this whole Clinton rift was a figment of the MSM's imagination. Turns out I was wrong. This shit is real. I guess this is what not being on the ground in Denver can cause.

And I have a question: Why aren't some of you bloggers down ( or should I say up) in Denver confronting these mother fuckers and finding out their true motivations? There is something deeper than just losing an election going on here. And I don't believe Hillary one bit. Not when I read shit like this. Now maybe she will change my mind with her speech tonight, but unless she is a better actress than Betty fucking Davis, I doubt that is going to happen.

So anyhoo, here is what that deranged woman sent me:

" To be removed from this mailing list, just ask. (Don't worry girlfriend, I am thinking about it) Permanent link to MTA daily media news, direct link to today's post
Union Station protest at the MSNBC kiosk (by riverdaughter at The Confluence)We got ourselves a posse and went down to Union Station in front of the MSNBC kiosk. We protested and shouted slogans (in NPR-speak) and completely drowned out the Obamaphiles.
We had a lot of support from passersby. I was very encouraged that there were many sympathetic people. I don’t think the Obama people knew what hit them. They’ve had such a free ride for so long. No one challenged them. no one was skeptical. They have been handled with kid gloves like pampered little brats. But in the face of all of the people they’ve been calling stupid, old women, they seemed oddly subdued. Chris Matthews made an appearance and stood there silently while some of us finally got a chance to tell him how we felt to his face. The coward waited until we left before he came down from the stage to talk to the crowd.

Poll: More than half of Clinton backers still not sold on Obama (USA Today)DENVER — Fewer than half of Hillary Rodham Clinton's supporters in the presidential primaries say they definitely will vote for Barack Obama in November, a USA TODAY/Gallup Poll finds, evidence of a formidable challenge facing Democrats as their national convention opens here today. In the survey, taken Thursday through Saturday, 47% of Clinton supporters say they are solidly behind Obama, and 23% say they support him but may change their minds before the election. Thirty percent say they will vote for Republican John McCain, someone else or no one at all."So, of course, instead of honoring Hillary and wooing her supporters, they want to take away her roll call vote. On this, the 88th anniversary of the day women were granted the right to vote, they are in the process of suppressing the delegates’ right to vote for the first woman to be a viable presidential candidate. It’s almost cosmic in the level of insult.

Calling all delegates! (by Eastan McNeal at No Quarter)The Obama / DNC rumor that ABC is tossing out (no roll call vote) is just that. A RUMOR! These are the same folks, along with the AP, CNN and MSNBC that told us that Hillary dropped out, just as the last primaries were being staged. Pay no mind to the fools behind the curtains. Do not call your friend or spouse who is in Denver as a Delegate and tell them to come home, it is over. It is not! Jezz! What ever happened to fair play?There’s never, ever been any fair play where the Clintons are concerned. Think about how manipulative and insulting it is to tell the media what someone else is going to do, to make that person do what you want her to do.

Stephanopoulos: No Roll Call Vote for Clinton? (Political Radar, ABC News)"The whole idea of a roll call vote could be in flux at this point," Stephanopoulos told ABC's Charles Gibson on World News Sunday night. "The Clinton people here, they've said they wanted catharsis, they wanted that roll call, but they may not get it," Stephanopoulos said, describing the decision as one being discussed at the highest levels of Clinton's camp. "They don't want to be blamed for any trouble at this convention."Don’t you get it, Hillary? YOU’RE GOING TO BE BLAMED NO MATTER WHAT!!! May as well stand up and fight. I’d rather be blamed for commission than omission.

Catharsis My Ass (by Larry Johnson at No Quarter)I want to ensure you get a full taste of the “class” of the Obama team. Hillary has done everything in her power to encourage folks to support Obambi. Unfortunately, not even Hillary is that powerful. Most of us can not be swayed to back a guy who is so completely and fully unqualified to be President. Nonetheless, Hillary pressed on to support the “young God” and what did it earn her? This: [Click through to watch a disgraceful video, full of right-wing inspired hate points against Hillary.] Hillary has conducted herself with grace and intelligence (we expected nothing less). These Obama thugs? Not so much.

Monday: The Audacity (by riverdaughter at The Confluence)It really is astonishing to me that the media is missing one of the biggest stories of the whole election- the gaming of the convention itself. This is going to be one giant caucus fraud and it’s going to be shown before a huge, televised, national audience and yet, the DNC and the Obama campaign are trying to force delegates into a final official vote before the actual roll call vote. Do they think no one will notice? One reporter got a clue last night (though we’ll see if she actually follows up on it). She said something like, “Aren’t they supposed to do that on the convention floor? If the vote is official before they vote, isn’t that breaking the rules?” Ding! Ding! Ding!

When Democracy returns to the Democratic party, so will we. Until then, PUMA! (by sm77 at The Confluence)I stand by my Floridian voter’s opinion: “If a bank robber was caught stealing money and at their trial, they made a plea bargain to give most of the money back - it still doesn’t exculpate them from the crime they committed. The robber should be punished regardless. PUMA was formed to protest the DNC’s hijack of Democracy. We want Democracy back in the Democratic Party, and you will not get our support and votes until our Democratic leaders start acting Democratically again.”

Clinton supporter says she was called 'Uncle Tom' (AP)DENVER - A black delegate for Hillary Rodham Clinton says she was called an "Uncle Tom" by Illinois Senate President Emil Jones, one of Barack Obama's political mentors.
Alegre’s Corner"

Yeah you are lucky "Uncle Tom" is all he called you. I would have called you worse than that. Like fucking insane maybe. Why are you lunatics supporting a man who disagrees with you on all the major issues? Like what to put in and take out of your vagina instance?

Sorry for the strong language folks, but sometimes you just can't sugarcoat shit. Cutting off your nose to spite your face is one thing, and giving up control of your body because you lost an election primary is just as bad.

Another RNC white out?

Hmmm, looks like up in the land of a thousand lakes the rethuglican field Negroes are getting restless. But what did they expect, that the party of Lincoln was all of a sudden going to get inclusive on them? Newsflash: A few colored folks does not make big tent make, it's a lot deeper than that.

I would like to thank my man Dave Topper for sending me the link to the following story:

"The campaign of Barb Davis White went after the Republican National Committee and the Republican Party of Minnesota on Tuesday, criticizing the RNC’s failure to invite any African-American congressional candidates to speak at the Republican National Convention and complaining that the Minnesota GOP has been lax in supporting Davis White’s campaign. Davis White is the Republican Party’s endorsed candidate for the 5th Congressional District, which encompasses Minneapolis and several inner-ring suburbs.

In an email sent to the RNC and posted to the Independent Business News Network, Davis White’s press secretary, Don Allen, said that he had tried to get answers from the RNC numerous times as to why no African Americans are scheduled to speak at the RNC.
He wrote that he was stonewalled and, at least one time, threatened. He accused the party of discriminating: “This ’slave mentality thinking’ i.e.; ‘Be good you Black Republicans while our White friends are in town’ does not fly with me or the tools I have in place to distribute this message ‘top-of-mind’ to the general public and national news affiliates.”

Allen said that the local GOP has not been supportive of Davis White’s campaign. “Keith Ellison is not worried and rest assured that the Minnesota GOP will put no effort into an African American Republican candidate for Congress in Minnesota with the current leadership of the GOP,” he wrote.

He charged the party with jeopardizing the 5th District: “Again, and for the last time — I will ask, what African American Congressional Candidates have been scheduled to speak at the RNC? What do we really have to loose, besides Minnesota’s 5th Congressional District?”
Minnesota’s 5th District is heavily Democratic and has voted for the DFL candidate since 1963.

What? The local GOP is not supportive of an African American candidate? I am shocked, shocked I tell you.

Look, you want to know one reason I am not so into conventions? Well I will tell you why: It's like this: I was at the rethuglican convention in the Big Easy back in 1988, when they nominated the frat boy's daddy, and the single digit IQ man, Dan Quayle. Trust me, it was not a pleasant experience. "A Thousand Points Of Light" my ass. I was one of the few dark spots in that bitch, and those "points of light" weren't looking too friendly. (Gino,you are my man, and I love you like a brother, but don't you ever put me in some shit like that again) But field that was twenty years ago, the republican party has become far more inclusive since then. Yeah, well maybe they have. But you know what? My black ass will never be around them long enough to find out. Some things you just don't ever forget.

Denver on my mind.

So this is the week the dems meet in the Mile High City to make history. This is the week that they formally nominate his "O" ness. I think that it's historic, and for that alone it would have been interesting to be there. But that's not going to happen; three criminal cases,one case before the Pennsylvania Human Relations Commission, not to mention, being the trier of fact in my own domestic relations cases, says the kid couldn't be there if he wanted to.

Honestly, I am going to keep it real; I sure hope the bloggers who end up in Denver can give me something that I am not already going to get from the main stream media. I hear that the DNC is giving credentials to some state blogs, and the usual netroots suspects, and I have to wonder what I am going to learn from going to their blogs. (There are some issues with too few blogs of color being credentialed, but since my black ass didn't even apply I am going to leave that alone)

I am still trying to figure out just what the hell I would do in Denver to make my blogging relevant. Hmmm, let me see now, I guess the first thing I would do is try to figure out who the hell are these PUMA people? I always thought PUMA was the sponsor of my Jamaican track team, now I hear that it stands for "Party Unity My Ass" or some shit like that. Apparently, these are some Hillary folks who are pretty pissed off. I guess I would try to get into the head of some of these folks to try and find out why they hate on the "O" man so much? But what would be the point? They would try to tell me some bullshit, and I would know that they were full of it. But I would want to know who is behind P.U.M.A., and I doubt seriously if they (the individual members) would even know. Hillary is that you?

Then there are these anarchist. Why are they even in Denver? Shouldn't they be saving all their energy for Minneapolis? I mean go crash the rethuglicans party, they deserve it more. I guess I could hang with them in the streets a little bit and try to file a report....ahhh scratch that. I am not trying to go to jail with those crazy mother fuckers.

And what about all those FOX cameras all over the place? I even saw one clown in the middle of a protest asking why the people were protesting? I guess if I was in Denver I would want to know why anyone with a FOX microphone or a camera, should not be given a royal ass whupping. Hey, I am not advocating violence, just wondering out loud, that's all.

And let's not forget the Clintons. Can any of these bloggers get next to the Clintons? I would love to know what they are thinking? I know one thing; if the Clinton's walls could talk, it would make for one hell of a story.

And of course there is the star of the show, his "O"ness. I wonder if any of the bloggers will get next to him for a little sit down? If I did I would have only one question for him: Why do you have a stinking Dukie as your valet and personal "Man Friday"? Didn't you know that they are bad luck? And then his cool ass would probably tell me something like: Well field, this is America, and everyone can change, even Dukies.

The "O" and Joe Show!

Now that his "O" ness has selected his Robin to be his sidekick for his version of "The Dark Night" (let's call it the dark presidency), it's time to dissect the pick. I think, to be honest, that the general consensus is that this was a good pick by the "O" man. He could have done better from a pure political standpoint (Sam Nunn anyone?), but he could have done a lot worse as well. (Hillary anyone?)

And folks, let's not get it twisted; the field doesn't think the "O" man could win these elections if he had selected Abe Lincoln himself to be his running mate. But selecting Biden won't let the beating he is going to get any worse.

So anyway, let's take a look at the pros and cons of a Biden pick, shall we?

PRO: He is a white male.

CON: He is a white male from a very Northern state.

PRO: He has a great personal story.

CON: His running mate already has a great personal story.

PRO: He is a glib passionate speaker, who speaks his mind and will do well in the debates.

CON: He is a glib passionate speaker, whose mouth might get him in trouble. It has before.

PRO: He has great foreign policy credentials, and has the fact that he is the Chairman of the Foreign Relations Committee on his resume.

CON: He has great foreign policy credentials, and the "O" man picking him will seem like he is trying to cover up one of his weak areas, foreign policy.

PRO: He is not Hillary.

CON: He is not Hillary, and her peeps won't like it. Get ready Denver.

PRO: He is from Delaware, and that will help him with the Southeastern part of Pistolvania and the Philly suburbs.

CON: He is from Delaware. A very small state that his "O"ness was already going to win.

PRO: He has years and years of experience in Washington.

CON: He has years and years of experience in Washington. (What about change "O" man?)

PRO: Being born in Scranton Pistolvania and Catholic should help with some of those blue collar voters that the "O" man was having problems with.

CON: Many of those voters aren't voting for the "O" man and will never vote for a brother to be their president.

PRO: He is a fighter.

CON: He is a fighter, and his running made will seem even more benign and indulgent than he already is.

PRO: He is photogenic.

CON: Well, there is the whole "hair club for men" thing.

The Third World man and the heiress.

Conservatives and reich wingers love the imagery you are seeing with this post. Because it is a picture of the "O" man's half brother, and he is clearly a Third World man. Conservatives are all over his "O" ness for having a half brother who lives in a shack, is dirt poor, and lives on what is the equivalent of an A-merry-can dollar a month. "How can he have made four million dollars last year and his brother lives in a shack? What a Hypocrite." One clown from FAKE NEWS is mocking his "O" ness by having a telethon to raise money for his brother. (I sure hope he gives the guy the money he raises, otherwise he should be arrested for fraud)

Reich wing A-merry-cans love this image for another reason: it reminds other A-merry-cans of just how black his "O" ness really is. When they see the Third World man living in that shack, it reminds them that half of his "O" ness comes from a Third World man too; and we just can't elect him to be our President now can we?

I bet no one ever bothered to ask the "O" man's brother if he was fine with his life as a Third World man. Hey, I know quite a few people who live in Third World countries and who are quite happy with their life. Sure, they might not have a lot of material wealth, but believe it or not my fellow A-merry-cans, some people in this world actually believe that there is more to life than money.

Some people. Because apparently Mr. Morton's wife has been a little less than honest about her background. Girlfriend claims that she is an only child; but not so fast.

"Welcome back to the BuzzFlash GOP Hypocrite of the Week. In an attempt to come off as the all-American wife and mother, Cindy McCain is putting aside real family values. Cindy (or her handlers?) has shown a pattern of deceit in her attempt to fulfill the role of Stepford wife in her husband's campaign. But her most recent fabrication is quite hurtful.
Most recently, her oft-repeated assertion that she is the only child of her father, Jim Hensley, was proven untrue on all accounts. In fact, Cindy has three, count 'em, three half sisters. One, Kathleen Hensley Portalski, called in to a program on National Public Radio this week to correct the reporter who repeated Cindy McCain's characterization of herself as an only child.
Cindy's father was married to Mary Jeanne Parks, who gave birth to Portalski before the couple's divorce. Hensley then married Marguerite Johnson, who bore Cindy McCain nine years later. Even before all this, Hensley already had a daughter, named Dixie Burd, by a third woman. In addition, Cindy is not the only child of her mother, who had another daughter before her marriage to Hensley. So, Cindy is no one's only daughter."

Now now Cindy, at least the "O" man acknowledged his brother and actually went to visit him.

Oh well, you know what they say: "people in glass houses (and you have lots of them Cindy) shouldn't throw stones." And girlfriend, there is lots of glass in your house.

Home is where the heart is.

Damn it Mr. Morton, just when I was about to go ahead and vote for you because of your position on the draft, you go out and do some dumb crap like this. Did you really tell "politico" that you don't know how many homes you own? My god man, talk about out of touch.

To be fair; the average A-merry-can is used to his or her politician running for president being wealthy and somewhat privileged. But honestly Mr. Morton, you don't have to rub it in our faces. $500 loafers? Wealth starts at five million? Not knowing how many homes you own? WTF? Now you have me flip flopping again......geez!

And hey, I know that your wife, Cindy, is filthy rich, and that those homes (How many are there? Four? Six? Seven? Only his realtor knows for sure.) are probably all hers. But you might just want to lose that populous, everyman message. No matter how much you try to be one of us regular folks, you come up a little short. Because, let's face it, not too many of us have a hundred million collecting interest in the bank. Message to Morton: If you want to appeal to "middle class" A-merry-cans, it might help to know how many fucking homes you own. Just a thought. Because I guarantee you that the average A-merry-can knows how many homes he/she owns, what the mortgage is, and the exact date that it's due.

"Does a guy who made more than $4 million last year, just got back from vacation on a private beach in Hawaii and bought his own million-dollar mansion with the help of a convicted felon really want to get into a debate about houses? Does a guy who worries about the price of arugula and thinks regular people 'cling' to guns and religion in the face of economic hardship really want to have a debate about who’s in touch with regular Americans?

Ouch! That was Mr. Morton's mouthpiece, Brian Rogers, coming down on his "O" ness for his own little, ahem, house issues. That's it Brian, "stand by your man." Still, I bet if you ask his "O" ness how many homes he owns, he would know. Even if it is a hook up from Tony Rezko.

The draft candidate.

Oh Lawd, it looks like I am going to have to go ahead and disappoint a few of you Obamaholics, and risk the pleasure of your visits to the fields; not to mention my marriage. Why? Because I am going to vote for Mr. Morton, that's why.

Field, say it ain't so. What could have possibly led you to such a decision?

Well , as most of you may or may not know, I am a big proponent of bringing back the draft (At least for this "war on terror"). Because from where I sit, this damn war should be a shared sacrifice. It shouldn't only be those brave men and women who sign up as reserves, and who joined the armed services (for whatever reason), having to put their butts on the line for us while we "pursue happiness." And now it seems that I finally have a candidate who agrees with me.

Supporter: "And these are the people we tied yellow ribbons for, and Bush patted on the back. If we don't reenact the draft, I don't think we'll have anyone to chase bin Laden to the gates of Hell."

McCain:"Ma'am,... let me say that I don't disagree with anything you said. Thank you, and I am grateful for your support of all of our veterans."

No, thank you Mr. Morton, for going ahead and putting it out there. These chicken hawks, and cowardly soft hearted A-merry-cans, need to realize that when you become our Commander in Chief, everyone will get a number. Yes, even you draft dodging Obamaholics. I am sure that many of you will run off to Canada. I hope you like hockey and snow.

Look, there is the frat boy's "war on terror", and it's like this: we are on the verge of another cold war, and we need all of our eligible and available citizens to be ready to rumble. And honestly, we can't depend on you wimpy liberals and chicken hawk repukes to volunteer your services. So sadly, at this point in our history, we need a draft.

I just want to say, thank you Mr. Morton, for giving us that little insight into some of your future plans.

Obama who?

"Fight Club"

THIS JUST IN: THE "O" MAN GETS TOUGH!

RALEIGH, N.C. (AP) - "A combative Barack Obama said Tuesday that Republican John McCain 'doesn't know what he's up agains' in this election and challenged his rival to stop questioning his character and patriotism.

Obama, campaigning in a state where he hopes to become the first Democratic presidential candidate to win in more than three decades, implored his supporters to fight for the presidency.

'Our job in this election is not just 'win,' although I'm a big believer in winning,' Obama said during the rally. 'I don't intend to lose this election. John McCain doesn't know what he's up against.'

'He can talk all he wants about Britney (Spears) and Paris (Hilton), but I don't have time for that mess," Obama said.

His remarks carried forward a theme of feisty campaigning he debuted earlier in the day..."

Alright "O" man, does this mean that you are going to go (as one commenter to the fields describes it) "gully" now? Is this the South side of the Chi coming out? Well it's about damn time. I just hope it's not too late for you. I just hope, for your sake, that your opponent hasn't already defined you.

BTW, I am hearing that you might pick Joe Biden.....I am not sure how I feel about him. I know he has been a good Senator for the folks of Delaware, and he knows foreign policy, but....I mean let's get strategic here "O" man: The guy is from a tiny ass state, which you were already going to win. He is from a "blue" region of the country, and picking him will give you zero help in Ohio and Pennsylvania. Besides, the guy does have some loose lips.

But we will see. Hopefully, you haven't really made up your mind yet, and your peeps are just floating Biden out there to get the MSM all in a tizzy, and to dominate the news cycle.

And one more thing: Obamaholics, as soon as you get that message from his "O" ness on your blackberry; will you call the field and give me a heads up? Mrs. Field isn't speaking to moi right now (it's an Olympics thing) so she won't tell me.

Thanks.

THE FIX.

I recently posted my review of the showdown in Saddleback, and I gave the edge to Mr. Morton. Well I am embarrassed to say, that I, like the rest of A-merry-ca, was hoodwinked.

Sorry for the bad review folks, it's looking like Mr.Morton and his peeps might have cheated. Yes, our war hero didn't play fair. Turns out that he wasn't in a "cone of silence" as the moderator (let's call him "Minnesota Fats" for his role in this little sting) and hustler extraordinaire hinted at. Nope, he was on his way to the church in his motorcade. And since his "O" ness was on stage at the very same time, getting the very same questions that were going to be asked of Mr. Morton; unless you still believe in the tooth fairy, Santa Claus, or republican family values, you know damn good and well that Mr. Morton was getting the goods. --No wonder his answers were so perfect----

Now I compared Mr. Morton to Smoking Joe; a man I know, and a man I consider to be a great champion. And all I can say is; Joe, I am sorry. You would never have gone into the ring with Ali with over sized gloves, or questionable liquids in your water bottle. No, you would have fought a fair fight. You would not have punched Ali after the bell, or below the belt during a clinch. So comparing you to McCain was an insult to you and everything you stood for.

Oh come on field, how do you know that McCain cheated? You have no proof of this. You are taking the word of a few operatives and the Obama people. Yes I am. And you know what? If I have to make a choice as to who I will believe, guess who is going to win? I will give you a hint: it ain't the war hero.

“The insinuation from the Obama campaign that John McCain, a former prisoner of war, cheated is outrageous...” This is what one of Mr. Morton's surrogates had the nerve to tell us. As if a man who cheated on his wife, was a part of the "Keating Five", and who would damn near do anything to become President before he goes off to his final resting place in the desert, isn't capable of cheating.

To my readers I apologize. I should have played closer attention, I should have seen that the fix was in.

The gentleman candidate.

"He was the fattest man when he got off the plane....He didn't want to talk about how he turned in all those names"

"Respectfully, I am going to disagree about Senator McCain's service...."

That was an exchange between the "O" man and a supporter in one of his town hall meetings today.

I watched that exchange and I was trying to figure out what about it bothered me so much. It wasn't the fact that the old guy called out McCain. Hell he looked like a veteran of the damn war himself, and he had the look of a guy who had been through some shit his damn self. He was just the type of guy you expected to be living in Reno, Nevada. I was struck by his statement, and the bold and confident way which he said it [Besides, look at that picture? The guy just might have a point]. No, the guy questioning Obama didn't bother me; Obama's answer did.

"Respectfully I am going to disagree about Senator McCain's service, I think his policies are terrible, I think his service was honorable." Duh! We all know that "O" man, please stop stating the obvious on behalf of your opponent. Contrast that statement with the frat boy, when one of his supporters said this about Kerry back in 2004:

"'We got a candidate for president out here with two self-inflicted scratches, and I take that as an insult.'" To which the frat boy replied: "Well, I appreciate that, thank you..." This from a guy who never set foot in Vietnam his damn self.

Now that's how you answer a question like that. Don't apologize and come to the other guy's defense. Say what you want about the frat boy, but he is a typical down and dirty republican who knows how to get elected. The frat boy and his ilk show their opponents no respect, and that's how they win elections.

That might be the "O" man's problem: he is too damn respectful. And that is what bothered me about the exchange. Why did he have to jump to Mr. Morton's defense like that? Hell, do you think if someone in one of Mr. Morton's town hall meetings said some shit like that about the "O" man he would have come to the "O" man's defense? I doubt it. You would have gotten a smirk maybe, or an answer similar to the frat boy's, but not the stand by your man shit his "O" ness was pulling.

But Obama continues to be a gentleman. He continues to try and convince A-merry-ca that he is harmless, and that he is a non threatening safe Negro. He continues to play the smiling shoe shine man, or the old Negro who steps aside on the sidewalk without daring to make eye contact when the white man is coming.

Of course he didn't have to co-sign with what the man said, but he didn't have to go out of his way to come to Mr. Morton's defense either. He could have said something like: Now now, I understand your passion, but let's stick to the issues. Or, let's not resort to the types of tactics that the republicans are using on me. But he didn't. Instead, once again, he went out of his way to show A-merry-ca what an honorable gentleman he is.

Fine "O" man, and I am sure you will give a very honorable concession speech come November.

Showdown at Saddleback

I just caught the showdown at Saddleback. (What's up with the Ocean's 11 look?) Honestly, what does it say about A-merry-ca when the first time that the two men for President of these divided states hook up it's in a freaking church? Turns out that the man who gave us "a purpose driven life" *eyes rolling* is the only man in A-merry-ca who could have brought these two together. Boy, the church sure is powerful in A-merry-ca these days. I guess 911 made us all very religious. And why was it called the "Civil Forum"? Sorry, politics has long passed the point of being civil.

Anyway, a couple of thoughts: First, if we look at this little get together like we would a heavy weight fight, I would describe it like this: Obama was the classic boxer. The purist. Nimble on his feet, and full of fancy combinations. Mr. Morton, on the other hand, was the classic brawler, the puncher with a thick chin who isn't afraid to mix it up. Obama was Ali. Mr. Morton was Joe Frazier. And let's go ahead and call Rick Warren, Don King.

So who won? Alright let's go ahead and give the fight to Smoking Joe. Sorry Obamaholics, Mr. Morton beat your boy tonight. It wasn't a knockout, but he outpointed him. His punches were harder, and he was the aggressor throughout the fight. Oh your boy landed a few nice combinations, and he looked pretty good doing it. To steal a phrase from Ali: he was "floating like a butterfly." Unfortunately, he wasn't stinging like a bee. There was no pop behind those punches. The "O" man gave his typical thought out nuanced answers, and as is always the case when he debates, you could see why he made law review and not the moot court board at Harvard.

Mr. Morton was punching harder, and making direct blows. The straight talk was hitting with straight rights; and it was working. (Did you hear the audience? He had them at hello)

Of course they both had some bad moments too. The "O" man said that one of the three people whose advise he holds dear is Ted Kennedy. (Coming to a GOP commercial near you) And Mr. Morton said that being rich starts at five million dollars. (This is what being married to a woman who can wipe her ass with dollar bills for the rest of her life, and still have plenty left over, can do to your perception of wealth). I suspect that we will be hearing that comment again as well.

So anyway, after they went to their perspective corners it was left to the pundits and those of us watching in A-merry-ca to declare the winner. I am guessing that most folks saw it like I did. Unless, of course, they happen to be an Obamaholic.

Oh well, don't worry folks, there is always a rematch. Just tell your boy to train harder next time.

The White Party.

"If you look at folks of color, even women, they're more successful in the Democratic party than they are in the white, uh, excuse me, in the [laughs] Republican party."

Looks like Howard Dean, a man who is no stranger to controversy, and who has a reputation of speaking his mind, is at it again. The Reich wing blogs and bushites are all over him for his latest little comment.

Howard, I am a little curious about your "even women" comment ----as if women are an afterthought---, but other than that, I agree with you 100%.

I think we could characterize the republican party as the "white party." And many white folks would argue (present company excluded of course) that it's the exact reason that they are members of the grand ole party. Still, as is always the case with us hypocritical A-merry-cans-----especially when it comes to matters of race--, the person who calls a spade a spade (no pun intended) will always catch some flack.

The thing is, you could tell that it was a "Freudian slip", my man really didn't want to say that, but he sure was thinking it.

Still, Dean's rhetoric represents something dangerous as well, and I will tell you what it is: Howard Dean represents the white liberal wing of the democratic party, and in his mind his party is the party of blacks and women. I guarantee you, that to him, our vote is in the bag. In his mind, he doesn't have to worry about our vote, because the white folks vote republican, and the black folks vote democrat.

Black folks, we have to be careful about this, we cannot allow ourselves to be taken for granted. I know, I know, it's hard to vote republican. And personally, I would rather vote for Paris Hilton before I support a republican candidate or their platform. But we still have to explore all options and become informed about all the issues before just putting our vote down for the donkey. (An independent, a third party candidate... ) Howard Dean would not be so confident when he says that the republican party is the "white party" if us black folks didn't play easy to get. He would understand that he has to work to get us too. Hell we just can't be old reliable hanging around the bar at last call, after all the cuties have turned us down and headed home.

Yes Howard, folks of color are more successful in the democratic party. But to quote Michael's little sister: "what have you done for me lately?"

White folks can we talk?

Honestly, you people have got to start having more babies. This shit is getting ridiculous. Now comes word that by 2042 you won't be in the majority anymore.

Now before you white folks start pointing fingers at us black folks, let me say this right now: it ain't us. It's those damn Latinos and other minorities. I mean I know us black folks have a lot of babies, but we kill each other at a very alarming rate, so it cancels itself out.

And I have a confession to make: I don't want you white folks in the minority. If you are, who the hell am I going to complain about? I can't complain about President Sanchez; not when he is brown like me. You white folks will just say I told you so. When A-merry-ca is just one big Third World cesspool, you folks will be lamenting the good old days of Mom, Chevrolet, and Apple Pies.

Apparently a lot of you are getting older and not replenishing the white fold. I know just one or two kids is cool for economic reasons, but think of your race folks. Think of your race.

And all this race mixing can't help. These interracial marriages and shit.....I don't know.

Have you been to California? I swear no one there is just black or white anymore. They have all kinds of human hybrids out there. Cool to look at maybe, but not good for the white race.

Poor David Duke, and Pat Buchanan, they invested a life time of energy trying to keep A-merry-ca pure, only for it to come to this. But hey, at least they won't be around in 2042 to see the death of their beloved A-merry-ca. The scary thing is that these young white kids running around here don't even care. Hell, they are probably contributing to this shit by hooking up with some of these hybrid humans. Do they even realize what they are doing?

Oh well, you white folks better start planning now. Get some organizations to start looking out for your interests and shit. How does the NAAWP sound? Or the White Panthers? Or the Suburban League?.....never mind. I am sure you all are quite capable of naming your own organizations. Just stay away from KKK. It's so dated.

Beauty is in the eyes of the witchdoctor and the state.

Tonight I am thinking about Tanzanian Albinos and little Chinese children. What do the two have in common you ask? Well, it's all about "lookism". Yes my friends, in our visual obsessed world (sorry Stevie) you better have the look.

In Tanzania, Albinos are being stalked and killed for their body parts by witchdoctors. And in China, a cute little girl was dissed and her voice used for a cuter little girl, (or so they think) because,to the folks in China, she wasn't cute enough. (There is something really fucked up about that culture over there)

Why kill the Albinos? Well, because of how they look, that's why. I guess we could call this an extreme type of discrimination based on looks. No matter how fucked up things get here in A-merry-ca, I really don't think that really dark people stand the risk of getting shot to death because they are dark.....or, wait...okay, I take that back. Well at least they wouldn't get shot to death by witchdoctors.

The shit that happened in China is troubling and sad. Apparently the cute little girl who actually sang the song, "Ode To The Motherland" (That title alone should tell you something), wasn't cute enough, so they had another girl lip sync the song. (See what you started Milli Vanilli?). I always thought there was something really creepy about that society. Which is why--- even though I will be watching my "yawdies" when they hit the track-- I am not feeling these games. Pretending that all is honey roses in one of the most repressive societies on earth just reeks of hypocrisy to me. And let's not forget about their Darfur problem. Maybe this is why I didn't get too mad at the Spanish Basketball team for their little photo stunt. I know, I know, it was racist, and if someone had done that to some black folks, blah blah blah. The field is not worthy. Besides, what they did strikes me more as "lookism" than racism. The Spanish basketball team have no control or power over the Chinese; so a dumb case of "lookism" maybe; but not racism. But field, you are such a hypocrite, weren't you all over Don Imus because of what he said about the Rutgers women? Wasn't that just a case of "lookism"? What kind of power did he have over their lives? That's a fair point. But some things can't be explained. Maybe I felt that with all his power and influence, Imus had the potential to turn average A-merry-cans into witchdoctors. Or average police officer into wrong look exterminators.

But in the end; "lookism" only becomes a problem when it leads to racism or real discrimination down the line. See the Jews in Hitler's Germany; black folks in Reagan's A-merry-ca; or the poor Albinos in Tanzania.

Dear God.

To steal a line from my man Oliver Willis, I like to think that I am like "kryptonite to stupid". So when I saw this article I cringed at just how stupid some folks can be.

Just imagine, right now in A-merry-ca some poor soul is on his knees, praying to the creator for it to rain on the "O" man's parade.

Dear God, could you please send buckets and buckets of rain---kind of like you did back in the days of Noah-- to rain down on this uppity Negro, Osama. Dear God, we think he could be the Anti-christ here on earth; or worse, a communist. So we really need you to show him and all of his followers who is the boss. Dear God, they are talking about 75,000 lost souls in that huge house that Elway built, so there will be a nice large audience for you to display your powers.

And dear God, please don't let that uppity Negro think that he can take your place here on earth, because he already thinks that he has some of your powers. I see how people flock to him lord, and how they faint in his presence and I know it's the work of the devil. We know that he couldn't be the chosen one dear lord because, well, he is a Negro.

Thank you for hearing my prayers dear lord, and like those Negro rappers like to say: "let it rain."

You can't make this shit up. Well, you can make it up, I just did. But you and I both know that someone actually had or is having a similar prayer right now.

Steward Shepard of the Focus on the Family political arm said that was meant to be "mildly humorous". "MILDLY HUMOROUS"? No Stewart, that shit is hilarious.

"If people took it seriously, we regret it.."

Try telling that to all those people who already sent up their prayers to God.

Condi, we need to talk.

While we enjoy the guts and athleticism of our swimmers in the Olympics, and we obsess over where the Breck Boy is sticking his johnson; the world, as we know it, is going to hell in a freaking hand basket.

Many of you poo pooed my recent post about my Condi jones, and you said that I was being flip about my desire to...well, swing an episode with her. But imagine if Mrs. Field had given me permission, and I had been allowed to...well, get to know her better.

Can you imagine the opportunity your humble field Negro would have had to influence world affairs? While pillow talking with Condi , for instance, I would have had an opportunity to give her my humble opinion about her boss and what a colossal fuck up he has been.

For instance, now that the Russians have destroyed the A-merry-can trained Georgian army, and pretty much pimp slapped that entire country, has it ever occurred to your boss that none of this would have happened if the neocons in his administration had kept their damn ambitions in check? While they were busy planning their grand scheme to conquer the Middle East, they forgot that a former *KGB(thanks ac.nerd) agent was leading an increasingly more powerful and proud mother Russia into a new century.

So now our military is tied down in Iraq and Afghanistan, and all the frat boy can do is plead with Putin to pull back his troops. Too late, the red army is hell bent on putting an ass whopping on President Saakashvili's troops, and they will not stop until there is total humiliation, surrender, and regime change. You know Condi, kind of like what we did in Iraq. But field, this is different, this was a sovereign nation with a democratically elected leader. Really? But so was Iraq. And although their leader wasn't "democratically elected", quite a large segment of their population was fine with the job he was doing. Besides, I thought we went into Iraq to prevent them from attacking us with WMD's?

And didn't the Russians go into Georgia because the Georgians attacked one of their states (South Ossetia) which wanted to align themselves with Russia? Don't most of those people in that state consider themselves Russians? If that's the case, couldn't we argue, that Putin, in essence, was coming to the defense of his own people?

So what are we going to do now? The Russians have flexed their muscles, and all we can do is watch. Oh your boss, the frat boy, will make his usual pronouncements condemning what the Russians did; but so what? Putin will just continue doing what he has been doing for the past few days: shaking his dick at us, and giving us his ass to kiss. (Still think you can see into his soul now frat boy?) Putin might be a lot of things, but he isn't stupid.

And Condi, I hear that you yourself had a heated phone conversation with the Russian Foreign Minister, Sergei Lavrov, after he told you that the Georgian President must go. Then the Russian Ambassador, Vitaly Churkin, said this to our Ambassador: "I'd like to say straightaway that regime change is an American expression....We do not use such expression". See what a mess the frat boy put you in Condi? See how he tied your hand? You can't even do your job anymore. And to think you have a doctorate in this shit.

"Russia has invaded a sovereign neighboring state and threatens a democratic government elected by its people. Such an action is unacceptable in the 21st century.. The Russian government must reverse the course it appears to be on and accept this peace agreement as a first step toward solving this conflict,..."

Yeah whatever frat boy. And somewhere down in a very hot place called hell, a man with a thick mustache and a funny beret is laughing his ass off.

"RACISM AND THE RACE"

I want to thank a regular reader of the field's blog, for sending me an e-mail with the link to an interesting article.

Thank you Vaughn, and you are right; I don't think I will be doing my Carl Lewis imitation down Broad Street in my birthday suit.

Here is the article from the "New York Times," which was written by a gentleman by the name of Charles Blow:

"This is supposed to be the Democrats’ year of destiny. Bush is hobbling out of office, the economy is in the toilet, voters are sick of the war and the party’s wunderkind candidate is raking in money hand over fist.

So why is the presidential race a statistical dead heat? The pundits have offered a host of reasons, but one in particular deserves more exploration: racism.
Barack Obama’s candidacy has shed some light on the extremes of racism in America — how much has dissipated (especially among younger people) and how much remains.

According to a July New York Times/CBS News poll, when whites were asked whether they would be willing to vote for a black candidate, 5 percent confessed that they would not. That’s not so bad, right? But wait. The pollsters then rephrased the question to get a more accurate portrait of the sentiment. They asked the same whites if most of the people they knew would vote for a black candidate. Nineteen percent said that those they knew would not. Depending on how many people they know and how well they know them, this universe of voters could be substantial. That’s bad.

Welcome to the murky world of modern racism, where most of the open animus has been replaced by a shadowy bias that is difficult to measure. As Obama gently put it in his race speech, today’s racial “resentments aren’t always expressed in polite company.” However, they can be — and possibly will be — expressed in the privacy of the voting booth."

More here:

I think I will cut back my workouts now. And tomorrow, I think I will have a big fat cheese steak for lunch.

Mr. Morton, silence might be golden for you.

So now that it has been confirmed that the Breck Boy was getting some nooky on the side, the right wing attack dogs have been foaming at the mouth. Over at FUCK NEWS, as can be expected, it has been wall to wall coverage. One of their blond bimbo anchors and the house Negro with the fucked up toupee even had some clown on from the "National Inquirer" today. He was promising to give us more juicy headlines and drop another bombshell or two soon. *Yawn*. Can someone please wake me when this shit is over? Like we really care who or what someone is poking as long as they can do the job we elected them to do.

Here is the thing that a lot of these right wing crazies don't get: The only reason we are all over them when they are caught fucking around on their spouses, is because they are such a bunch of hypocrites. Bob Livingston going all out to get Bill Clinton, for the very same thing he was doing at the time, took balls. The lying piece of shit, Larry Craig, trying to get his freak on in a public bathroom, while publicly condemning gays and sponsoring legislation against homosexual behavior, took big ones. (No pun intended)

Which leads me to Mr. Morton. A word to the wise for the salty one: While this John Edwards thing is going down, you need to keep your damn mouth shut. You have been getting a pass from the A-merry-can people because you are a war hero, but you are no different or better than John Edwards. You did the exact same thing. You fucked around on your first wife. And from all indication, you have been fucking around on this one too.

But don't worry, your friends over at FAKE NEWS will realize this soon. And, as a result, they will ease up on the Breck Boy just a little bit. Let's hope that they do, because if they don't, folks will start pointing their fingers at you. And I am sure that this is the type of scrutiny you don't want.

The "Hillaryites" blame his "O"ness for some outings.

Now I used to like Carolyn Kay from "makethemaccountable.com". Used to. Because she always sent me some pretty informative shit. And I always knew that she was a rabid Hillary supporter, so I understood when she would send me the occasional "O" man bashing memo. But the latest shit she sent me is troubling. For some reason Carolyn and the rest of the Hillaryites are linking the Breck Boy's outing to the "O" man. Here is what she sent in my inbox: (Sorry Carolyn, if you don't like me publishing this shit on my blog, don't send it to me)

"Q. What do the two stories below have in common?
Edwards admits having affair, says he's ashamed (AP)WASHINGTON - John Edwards says he made a serious error in judgment when he had an affair and is ashamed of his conduct. In a statement, the former Democratic presidential candidate also said he informed his wife about his affair with 42-year-old Rielle Hunter in 2006 and has asked her forgiveness.

Internal Clinton E-mails Marc Ambinder at The Atlantic) The Atlantic’s Josh Green has about 200 of them from the height of the Clinton campaign. Atlantic subscribers should be getting the story in their mailboxes later next week, and we hope to post the story online early next week.

A. They are former opponents of Barack Obama, people that he wants diminished or out of his way at the Democratic Convention in two weeks, so that his light can shine (oops, is that racist) more brightly.

There’s a history of people who oppose Barack Obama having their dirty linen aired in public.
In the 2004 primary for his U.S. Senate seat, Blair Hull was Obama’s only serious opponent. Hull’s divorce papers were made public just a few weeks before the primary, papers that included incendiary charges of intimidation by his former wife. Hull’s poll numbers dropped, and he lost the primary. It has been reported that he donated to Hillary’s presidential campaign.
In an amazing coincidence, Obama’s first opponent in the general election for Senate in 2004, Jack Ryan, ALSO had his divorce papers made public, papers that included his former wife’s accusation that he had tried to get her to have sex with strangers at clubs he took her to in New York and Paris. Ryan had to drop out of the race, and the Republicans chose the hapless Alan Keyes to run against Obama. Obama won in a cake walk.

But it’s Hillary Clinton who plays dirty. It’s Hillary Clinton who holds grudges. It’s Hillary Clinton who has an enemies’ list. It’s Hillary Clinton who kneecaps her opponents. I know because the blogger boyz told me so."

Sorry Carolyn, get over it. The Breck Boy fucked up all by his lonesome, it has nothing to do with the "O" man. And yes his opponents were outed, it's called politics, get over it. And no, "light can shine" is not racist. But now I am going to ask you and all the rest of the Hillaryites a serious question: Do you really think that if Hillary and her crew had something on the "O" man they wouldn't have used it against his black ass by now?

Think about. Sometimes we are so blinded by our own political favorites that we fail to see the forest for the trees. Not me, I have no favorites, and I am quite aware of the fact that people (all people) will do anything to get elected.

"O" man, for your sake, I hope there are no sexual skeletons in the old closet. Because no matter what you and your supporters might want to believe, you ain't JFK just yet.

My Condi jones.

Well I will be damned. It seems that Condi is human after all. Now comes word that she has a crush on the brotha that most sisters (Including Mrs. Field) from California to Maine are feeling. I must admit, that it is kind of nice to know that Condi has feelings after all. Honestly, I was starting to wonder about her. Man or woman, it really wouldn't matter to me, but I wanted to see my Secretary of State with somebody, anybody. And all you people with these rumors about Condi and the frat boy need to quit it right now. You have no proof or evidence of this. You are all just making all of this lecherous and salacious shit up. And it's not fair. It's not fair to Condi. It's not fair to George. And it is not fair to Laura....

I did hear of a certain gentleman from North of the border who she was seeing some time back. But I guess nothing came of that. I wonder if the fact that she doesn't have a significant other affected her chances of being selected as a running mate for Mr. Morton?

Hey, am I the only brotha who finds Condi somewhat attractive? Maybe it's all that power. Or her smarts ( I love a smart woman). Or the way she wore the hell out of those black high top boots. Field this is so sexist, would you be blogging about who Condi has a crush on, or her sex life if she was a man? Hmmmm, let me think about that for a minute....No!

Now I don't agree with her politics, and you all know how I feel about her boss. But as the frat boy's hegemonic reign comes closer to an end, I find myself feeling Madame Secretary more and more. I want to see her with a significant other. Someone who makes her happy. I want her to get her freak on whenever she feels like it, and wake up with a smile on her face every morning. I know I know, there is something sick about this. And honestly, I can't explain it either. The woman should be tried for war crimes with the rest of the frat boy's minions, and here I am wishing that she finds sexual satisfaction, and wondering what her, ahem, diplomacy skills would be like in a more,ahem, intimate setting. (Fellows is something wrong with me?) This might seem trivial but it's serious business. Think how much more lucid the person calling the shots for our state department would be if she was....well, you know, getting some.

Hi Condi, it's me, Denzel. I was wondering if you would like to do lunch sometime? Come on Denzel, now that you know how she feels about you, take one for the Republic; make the call.

Shame on all of us.

So this is what it has come to. After almost eight years of the most inept, corrupt, venal, and morally deprived administration in the history of these divided states; we have finally reached the point where we cannot be shocked by anything they do. Because, let's be honest folks, if this story doesn't shock you, I don't know what will.

Ron Suskind is a well respected journalist, and he has taken the time to write a serious book with credible sources, to tell us what we already know about the thugs who ran our country for the past seven plus years. Of course, as is always the case, the wingnuts are in full fight back mode. He is just another political hack who has issues with our president. It's all lies. Don't believe a word of it. He is not credible. But we know better don't we. And I think most A-merry-cans (even the republicans) know better too. Still, we are all past the point of being shocked at anything the Bushites do now. We are all just hoping this long nightmare will end, and that the frat boy and his minions will just go off into the Texas sunset. ----If you don't believe that this country has issues with race, ask yourself: How in the hell could any candidate who can walk and chew gum at the same time only be up a couple of points on the candidate from the frat boy's party?----

Come on field, do you really think our president would order papers forged in order to link al-Qaeda to Sadaam in order to justify a war with Iraq? Yes I do! And every A-merry-can with half of a brain should too. But we can't can we. We refuse to believe that the man we elected twice to lead our great nation can be capable of such nefarious and scurrilous things. But he is. If I was on a jury and I let a killer go free, and he went out and killed again, I would feel bad too. In the fall of 2000 we let the killer go, because maybe we didn't know. But then we had our chance, and we tried him a second time [in 2004], and we let him go again. Now, the proof is in, and we are faced with the reality that he is the killer, and we feel so bad about ourselves that we just choose to block it all out.

Well I voted against the son of a bitch. Twice! So I feel no guilt, and I have a clear conscience. And it gives me great joy to say: I told you so.

The Reality Of Hopelessness.

"Got my glock cocked, runnin this thing, ya understand We be steamin.. blazin.. nines, pumps, and K's, and Holly Grove 17th, (what) tha hood where I (what) was raised in (what)Niggaz bustin heads and, runnin duckin Feds and rocks under they tongues and, ki's under they beds and Hood fulla real niggaz, twenty-four seven hustlers EHHH, until we shove a barrel down ya pipe suckers Ain't no love for no busta, no fear for no coward No respect from no stunt, and no money without power" ~ Lil Wayne~

"You ever been hungry lawyer man?"

I had to think about the question for a minute....no, I had never been hungry. Not unless I chose to be. But I have met people who were. I lived in a Third World country, so I saw real poverty first hand. The truth of the matter is, I never really imagined real hunger being a problem in A-merry-ca. And I never imagined poverty here in A-merry-ca being real poverty. Poverty, after all, is a relative term.

But as I looked around this Southwest Philly neighborhood, I could never have imagined that a place like this could exist in the land of the free. It was, in a word, hell. Every other house was boarded up, graffiti was on damn near every wall, and I am thinking that when Bob Marley sang about "concrete jungle", this is exactly the type of neighborhood he was talking about.

Still, I felt somewhat comfortable here. I had done wills and other forms of transactional legal work for quite a few grandmothers in the area. And I had represented a few of the grandsons with criminal cases; including the young buck who was running this particular set a few years ago.

I was leaving the home of a client, when, as is always the case, I was approached by one of the young heads from the area. They always like to mess with me, and pick my brain about legal issues. I, in turn, try to counsel them about life, and quiz them about school and getting their life in order. It's a shaky truce that we have, and everyone knows the rules. I won't charge them for legal advice, and they will (at least pretend to) listen to me.

"Naw man, I don't think I have ever been hungry". "I have". He said. "I remember when I was in foster care back in the day. Man I used to put toothpaste on writing paper and chew it for candy. I swear some nights I would go to bed and my gut would feel like it was going to explode. I don't ever want to feel that shit again."

Why was he telling me this? I knew there was a point, but I couldn't figure it out. Was he trying to confess to a crime, and justify why he did it because he was hungry? "Well you not hungry anymore right?" "Naw, Mr. Lawyer man, I can eat now. And I got a young jawn (That's Philly speak for any pronoun you want it to be. In this case he was talking about his child) I gotta feed too. I ain't trying to go to child support court." I knew what the answer was going to be but I asked the question anyway: "Do you have a job?" "Naw Mr. Lawyer, not no nine to five jawn, but I do alright." At this point he was laughing with me , but I didn't feel like laughing back. "You know you are probably going to be calling me one day right." "Naw lawyer man, not unless you do federal work." I couldn't resist. "Oh that's the kind of weight you moving around here?" "Naw not yet, but soon. I mean you cool and all lawyer man, but when I go down it will be for some big chumpy (another one of those Philly words) type shit. I will need a lawyer that stays up in federal court." ....I started to try and preach to young blood, but what was the point . Besides, it was starting to get late, and while some folks in the neighborhood might have some love for the field, it's still Southwest Philly.

"Alright young blood. I am out. Try to settle down with your shorty though and think about your little one. You won't grow old and get a pension running these streets. " "Yeah but I am young lawyer man, I got time."

Amazing, his ambition in life was to get a lawyer who specializes in federal cases, because he plans to move enough drugs to get the federal government on his case. But he was hungry once, and he doesn't ever want to feel that way again. To him, selling drugs and living a life on the street is the only way to keep money in his pocket. Most of us know that it won't last, and he probably does too. But to him, tomorrow doesn't matter. There is no future. And that little "jawn" he just brought into the world, will have to live the vicious cycle all over again.

President Obama. It has a nice ring to it. I wonder if he will come to Southwest Philly?

Sorry Stephen, they can't take any chances.

Poor Stephen Price, he sure could have used his race card over the weekend. All he wanted to do was his job. But it seems like Mr. Morton's security folks had some different ideas. (Sorry Stephen, we can't allow you to get too close to the Senator, you could be an Obamaholic. We know you blacks like to stick together). Stephen was told to take his black ass packing down the road. So do you have the proper press credentials Stephen? Check. Do you have a proper picture ID? Check. But Stephen, you do realize that you are are black right? Check. Sorry Stephen, we just can't let you get too close to the Senator, you people are getting desperate. I wonder what Bob Gabordi, the Executive Editor of the "Tallahassee Democrat", was thinking? Couldn't he have found a white reporter to cover the event? Hello! It was a republican event! Were you prepared to give poor Stephen combat pay Bob?

"We're deeply concerned and disturbed that our reporter — of all of those in that area — was asked to move.....My understanding is that Stephen was the only reporter approached and asked to leave the area, and the only reporter in that area who is black. Another reporter who stood up for Stephen was then asked to leave."



But it wasn't all bad. One of Stephen's colleagues had the guts and courage to stand up for him. (I told you all you should have some white friends). Unfortunately, she was told to take her n****r loving ass packing as well.





"Access to the senator is tightly controlled.... I would first express regret that your reporter was moved, and I can tell you beyond a shadow of a doubt that race had nothing to do with it."

So says Jonathan Block, Mr. Morton's advance person. Yeah sure Jonathan, and you know what? I don't find Lark Voorhies attractive at all.

"Can't we all just get along?"

I have to tell you, I get more angry and hate filled e-mails than you can imagine. It's no secret that the stormfront folks love to come to the fields, and if you don't believe me, check out this link. Yes folks, these supremacist tend to obsess over all things black. ---Which is cool, I can't say that I really blame them----. And they come at us with all types of vile racist shit. Which given the example being set by a certain salty one running for president of these divided states, I guess it's not surprising. (Thanks for the link granny and nsangoma)


So anyway, I got another one of those e-mails recently. And at first I was going to write it off as more of the usual. But something about this one was different. Something about this poor young lady's writing (she identified herself as such) and her tortured lament made me wonder about her. I actually thought of asking her permission to publish our e-mail exchange, when I stumbled on her blog. (And I know its her because the things she said in her post are the exact same things she told me via e-mail.) So anyway, because she actually published her position, I can now give you the post from her blog:

"It really burns me up to have to endure the lowbrow idiocy and the indulgence in self pity and hatred and blaming of other people that make up blogs like The Field Negro. Given the tone and content of the blog he should have called it The Field Nigger shouldn’t he.

The owner of the blog claims to be a lawyer in Philadelphia. If he is smart enough to be a lawyer he should be smart enough to be able to defend his opinions and allow everyone to comment but he has shut the public out and allows only his friends to comment. I don’t blame him since his content is so lowbrow.

If a white person has a comparable blog about the view points of white people then we are stereotyped as racist. Only blacks, Jews and other ethnic groups can get away with that. That is the source of a lot of white resentment, that our freedoms have been taken away and we are second class citizens in our own country.

The map in one of The Field Negro’s posts shows a divided America based upon ethnic and religious identity.

It is my argument that diversity leads to the breakup of countries and I have talked before about the breakup of America that will result from multi culturalism. I’m glad to see that The Field Negro legitimizes my fears for America’s future.

It occurs to me however that there is no way that blacks, Jews or other minorities are going to attempt to divide up America. They are parasites who could not exist without white people to feed upon."

Now that was posted under the title; "Why is the field Negro's blog not considered racist and unpatriotic?" And my poor friend from the "Wasp" blog (I think that's the name) seems really upset about that. Honestly, if she knew that the field Negro could care less if he is considered racist and unpatriotic or not, she wouldn't have asked what I assume is that rhetorical question . But okay Wasp person, because us field Negroes are such nice people, I am going to do you a favor: I am going to give the link to your blog, and as a result, I am sure you will get more hits than you have ever gotten before; and hey, maybe even a comment or two. Try to be nice and not block out the comments that my fellow field and honorary field Negroes might want to leave you. Now let's see if you are willing to defend your position as you are asking me to defend mine.

BTW, part of your frustration might stem from the fact that you are just not that bright. I have never blocked anyone from commenting on this blog, and although I am sure I could characterize a few people who comment here as friends. I am quite sure that many of the folks who comment here would take offense to that characterization.

You won't find these shoes at Wal-Mart

I have a confession to make: I am somewhat of a clothes pony---not a horse, I don't have that type of loot---During the week I like to rock some nice suits, and every now and then I will throw on my Alexander McQueen or my Hugo Boss suit, just because. So I am not going to kill Mr. Morton because I read about his $520 loafers while visiting one of my favorite blogs, "Crooks & Liars". Hey, the man's wife is filthy rich, and if he can afford to rock $520 Ferragamo loafers, god bless him.

But here is the thing: You can't go around ripping the other guy for being elitist and out of touch when you rock $520 loafers. You just can't. I wonder how many pairs of shoes the "O" man has the costs $520? I am guessing none. I am quite sure that Mr. Morton, on the hand, has quite a few of those bad boys. Hey when you have more homes than the Philadelphia Housing Authority, and you can afford to fly in your own private jet, and pay for your fuel with a Black Centurion Amex Card, you are doing alright. That everyman speech that Mr. Morton likes to give just isn't going to cut it no matter how authentic he wants you to think he is. But this is one of the true ironies of this campaign season. The man who really pulled himself up from his humble beginnings is being painted and elitist by the man who can afford to wear $520 loafers. The same man who voted against raising the minimum wage. Only in A-merry-ca.

Which leads me to something else I wanted talk about: (Thanks Jody and Crooks & Liars) Wal-Mart. Every time I see that big blue sign with the star in the middle I am reminded of a joke I heard somewhere. "If you don't think that god has a sense of humor go to your nearest Wal-Mart store." I bet there are no $520 loafers being sold there. Now it seems that the people who run America's favorite discount store are asking their employees to vote republican. Why? Because those nasty democrats will want unions that's why. (Like that's supposed to be a bad thing) Yeah, let me see now; I work at Wal-Mart busting my ass for $7 an hour, and I am going to vote against the democrats because they might allow unions to come into my work place and possibly get me $10 an hour. Nice.

Anyway, in the spirit of true disclosure, I too have been in the house that Sam built a time or two. And Mrs. Field, a self confessed country girl. ---That means there are Wal-Mart's within a stone's throw of her hometown---loves to bring the occasional merchandise from Sam's place into the field household. But no more, I will resist the urge to buy their cheap goods with everything I have. They have already destroyed Main street A-merry-ca by driving all the Mom and Pop stores out of business, and now they want to tell their workers how to vote? I don't think so.

Sam Walton and everything he stands for can kiss my ass. And so can Mr. Morton's phony ass with his $520 loafers.

It's working! Black is not beautiful in A-merry-can politics.

Okay so what do I know? Here I was thinking that all of these silly accusations and new campaign commercials by Mr. Morton, were pointless and would have zero effect on the race. But of course I was wrong. These repukelicans know their identity and polarizing politics more than I ever could, and they are in full gear already.

Now don't get me wrong, I have been telling you folks all along that his "O" ness cannot win this race, no matter how attractive he looks to you. (Wrong skin tone, wrong name, wrong political pedigree) Still, I never thought the GOP operatives would be this blatant this soon. But I should have known this was coming; they brought over some of the Bushites to run their campaign, and it has been down and dirty ever since.

I wonder how long his "O" ness is going to sit back and let his ass get kicked by the repukelican smear machine? If the two little blonds and accusations of the race card wasn't enough to make him come out and start swinging, I don't know what will. Oh yes, racial politics. You see "O" man, no matter how hard you try to run away from the racial question, the repukes are going to make sure it is following right behind you. They have to keep reminding A-merry-cans that you are black. They know, like I do, that as long as A-merry-cans see you that way, you don't have a snow ball's chance in hell of becoming president of these divided states.

Oh well, at least my Broad Street nude run is safe. But it would have been nice to say President Obama. He might not have been perfect, but he sure as hell couldn't be worse than the all white male club that's led us in the past.

He might never get on our money, but let's not rule out a postage stamp.