This is what his O ness allegedly told his aides while venting frustration over this whole BP mess.
O man, I am sorry, but just giving your aides a piece of your mind ain't gonna cut it. Not now. We are way past the "just plug the damn hole" stage.
When wingnuts first started saying with glee that this could be your Katrina, I was one of the first people to say that they are full of s*&t and just trying to score cheap political points. (Which, by the way, they were.) But now, as this crisis grows, I am starting to think that it very well could be. Not because of what the wingnuts think, they will never be with you. But some of your liberal friends are starting to get restless as well. They want to know, and rightfully so, why the hell the Army Corp of Engineers are dragging their feet in granting permits to start building channels to protect the Louisiana marshland. Boby Jindal is going to start crying like Ray Nagin any day now, and when he does, you are going to be toast O man. I don't care how much BP is at fault. Ken Salazar will be your Mike Brown. You remember him, don't you O man? "Brownie you are doing a heck of a job". Yeah, that guy. Salazar has been posturing and fuming at BP for days now, but the oil is still coming, and we are no closer to a resolution today than when that rig exploded what seemed like an eternity ago.
And I know I know, this is an oil company problem. They have the expertise, and they should know how to cap the hole. (Which reminds me, why aren't more companies coming together to try and solve this problem?) I have heard some folks say that if the government tried to step in and do something it could only make matters worse. So we can only sit around and wait and hope that the clowns at BP get it right. They will be using something called the "Top Kill Method", (somehow that name seems fitting) and the poor folks down in South Louisiana all have their fingers crossed. Their entire way of life and livelihood is being threatened.
But back to his O ness, because while Rome burns......just remember O man, the folks over at BP don't have to get elected. Yes, that brit with the cute accent might be the most hated man in A-merry-ca now, but he has become infamous under your watch.
And O, I hear you are going to a fund raiser out in Cali tonight. I know it's probably too late, but please don't go. Tell Barbara you will get her the next time. The stuff happening in the gulf could be life altering for A-merry-cans. Just like Katrina was. Imagery O man, imagery.
I hear that if BP messes this up the oil could be spilling into the Gulf Of Mexico for the rest of our lives. That's how much oil we are talking about. That, my friends, is some scary stuff. Most of us are far away from where this is happening, and we could care less about a bunch of Cajuns on the Bayou. Well, unfortunately, you are not as far away as you think. This tragedy will touch you in some way.
And if you are an Obamaholic, you will only have to wait until November 6, 2012, to feel it.