"LEGALIZE IT DON'T CRITICIZE IT LEGALIZE IT YEA-AH YEA-AH AND I WILL ADVERTIZE IT "
So being the day after the Super Bowl, I decided to listen to sports talk radio while driving home. And what do you think they were talking about? Nope, not the Super Bowl. The chatter tonight was all about Michael Phelps and his his rather zestful hit of a certain....well smoking device. Instead of talking about Santonio's catch, the talk centered around Michael's hit. (Just trying to stay with the football analogy)
"He will lose millions of dollars in endorsement deals now"." The guy is a disgrace". "You mean to tell me he couldn't stay out of those frat houses?" "He is an American hero for crying out loud he has got to be careful". And on and on it went. You could cut the outrage with a knife. Joe Six Pack couldn't have been madder at Michael if he was his own mama. Of course this is the same Joe Sixpack who probably has no problem downing a few after work before heading home to his loving wife and Joe Six Pack kids. The same Joe Six Pack who thinks the guy saying "this Buds for you" in those commercials is playing a doctor who is telling you to try the brew for your health.
Now, to be fair, if you had told me that one of the heroes from this summer's Olympic games would be caught on camera smoking my country's national plant, I would have guessed it would have been my fellow countryman, not the All A-merry-can hero. But apparently it's not that surprising, Michael has had some issues before. Of course you didn't hear about Michael's DUI arrest because apparently driving inebriated behind the wheel of a machine weighing two tons and capable of speeds over 100 mph is cool. Yeah, didn't you know? It's much more dangerous to sit in a dorm room and smoke a bong with some of your frat buddies.
Oh well, here is hoping that Michael doesn't lose any endorsements because of this. And I know that some of you are saying that a man who makes 5 million dollars per year because of his image should be more careful. Field it's easy for you to write on your blog and play the Pontiff while pontificate from your high horse, but you aren't signing his checks. Yeah but wouldn't it be nice if we A-merry-cans weren't so damn hypocritical? Look if smoking the collie weed causes Michael to get the munchies (hey that's what they tell me it does to you) and if he puts on weight as a result of said munchies and start moving in the water like a pregnant whale, that's on him. But Mike must be doing something right, weed or no weed, Mike can straight go get it in the water. And guess what? I am betting that Mike has hit the good collie weed a time or two before, and it sure hasn't affected him the water so far now has it.
So Michael did the right thing. He apologized to all the hypocrites in A-merry-ca and to his fans. He promises to be a good boy now and get back in the pool and start training for the world championships.
Hey Mike, they have some really nice pools in Jamaica.
I am just saying.