you are going to need it for that shotgun wedding coming up.
I know you all didn't think I was finished with the beauty queen did you? Sorry, I have quite a bit more to say. Especially given the fact that these lunatics on the right have actually deluded themselves into thinking that this is a viable VP pick. Ah, I hate to break it to you my republican friends, but this pick is border line laughable.
Now I really don't want to go there with Bristol, after all, she is still a teenager.... but I am afraid I must. Now poor little Bristol is pregnant with child. A nd Mommy and Daddy are trying so hard to spin this as a good thing. S ee folks, when little middle class conservative white girls get knocked up, it a beautiful thing. It's all planned to bring a precious life into the world. But when poor little inner city girls, from single parent homes, get knocked up, it's a bad thing. Because they are making poor choices and their little baby isn't as precious. Ah field why are you being so hard on little Bristol?
Because little Bristol's mama is a family values conservative who preaches abstinence only sex education in schools. And because her mama has now gone and declared that the poor child is engaged to the unborn child's father, at SEVENTEEN! Just imagine, this poor child is being forced to marry some boy who she gave some, because her fucking mother wants to impress her conservative friends, and not jeopardize her chances any further of becoming VP. --And they say us left wingers are heartless. ---Thanks to this soulless, republican, freak; her seventeen year old daughter has to stand the scrutiny of an entire country, as she goes through an unwanted pregnancy. Nice. Talk about "family values". "Bristol and the young man she will marry are going to realize very quickly the difficulties of raising a child which is why they will have the love and support of our entire family." No beauty queen, if you really loved your daughter; when Mr. Morton came knocking, you would have said no. But you didn't. It's much more important for you to get a national profile in order to spread your far right grotesque beliefs, than to protect your daughter from crazy ass left wing bloggers, like the field Negro. Sorry Bristol, your mama don't care about you, so why should I? Your mama is more concerned about getting a team of lawyers up to Alaska (as much as ten I hear) to defend her against ethics violations charges. Good luck with that beauty queen, we should get the results of the investigation at the end of October, just in time for you know what. As if I didn't have reason enough to despise this woman, costing me two extra trips to the gym every week is making her enemy numero uno in the field's book.
And finally, can we all get a collection going to pay off anyone who was around when this woman gave birth to baby Trig? I mean honestly; someone had to have been there besides her doctor. I just read in my local paper that the beauty queen was hustling through snowy streets in high heels in February when she was allegedly seven months pregnant. And that when she announced that she was seven months pregnant even her closest staffers were surprised. All the time her daughter was safely sequestered with ahem ahem, mono. This wasn't published on some left wing blog, this was published in the Philadelphia Daily News, and that's as main stream as it gets. Come on now. As a friend of mine used to say: "I might have been born yesterday, but I stayed up all night." And the more I think about this story, the more my bullshit alarm goes off.
But that's enough for one day. I am going to leave the beauty queen alone for now. But a few things are still on my mind: like how she and her hubby joined a group that wanted to break off from A-merry-ca, and how she tried the good collie weed but didn't like it, and.....oh lawd, let me stop now, my fingers are getting tired.
