Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Mr. President Call Home!

" A blind man knows he cannot see, and is glad to be led, though it be by a dog; but he that is blind in his understanding,which is the worst blindness of all, believes he sees as the best and scorns the guide. "~Samuel Butler~

I have a question: Just what the f**k is the frat boy doing in the Middle East? I thought we had a Secretary of State to make these types of diplomatic missions? Yeah yeah yeah, I know, he is the President, but trust me, he is doing more harm than good at this point. I mean the guy got us in this mess in the first place, and now it seems he is just making things worse. Not that it can get much worse over there.

Is it me; or does it seem like every one else has a clue except our beloved President? Tony Blair gets it. He sent a delegation to Syria to try to talk to the Syrians in order to get a regional consensus on the problems in Iraq. King Abdullah of Jordan gets it. He held meetings with that slick Iraqi Prime Minister-more on him in a minute-Nouri al-Maliki to try to come up with a unified and regional plan to solve the problems in Iraq. He advised the frat boy that the problem with Israel and the rest of the Arab states contribute to the problems in Iraq. And finally, the frat boy's daddy's friend, James Baker, gets it, and I guarantee you that his commission to study Iraq will come back with a recommendation to try to use other countries in the region to solve the problem in Iraq. Did I say Problem? I am sorry, I meant CIVIL WAR. Because make no mistake folks, that is what we now have in Iraq. The frat boy and his minions on his television station, -FAKE NEWS- can call it what they want, we all know what it is. It's Sunni against Shiite, with a few foreign fighters sprinkled in between.

The frat boy should have met with al-Maliki today but for some unexplained reason the meeting was canceled. I suspect it has something to do with a leaked memo dated November 8, 2006, from National Security Advisor Stephen Headley declaring al-Maliki a f**k up, and outlining a plan to help him to try to control his own country. Yeah I can just hear old Nouri after he heard about that one: "F**k those arrogant Americans, and that cowboy boot wearing Texan. Just who the f**k does he think he is? After he totally f***ed up our country he is going to tell me what to do? I don't think so!" Now don't get me wrong; I think al-Maliki is a snake in the grass, and the frat boy and his administration should have known better than believing anything that comes out of his mouth. He is a Shiite, and at the end of the day, he wants to live to be an old man. So of course he has to play ball with the most powerful man in Iraq. And that man, radical Shiite cleric,Moqtadi al-Sadr, has American blood on his hands. So Maliki plays this little dance; he needs the Americans to protect him, and keep what little stability his country has left, but he also doesn't want to piss off the man with the most powerful army on the ground in Iraq. So like a typical politician, he goes back and forth, and he dances between two worlds. From coming to Washington to beg for our help, to blowing off our President because a bunch of Shiite Parliamentarians promised to quit at home if he met with him.

So I go back to my original point; the frat boy should have stayed his ass at home. The symbolism of him meeting with Maliki is too powerful and too dangerous for the propped up Iraq leader. The bad perm lady would have done just fine, but I guess the sh** has gotten so bad, that the frat boy just figured that he had to do it himself. I guess that's why he sent "dead eye" Dick to meet with his friends in Saudi Arabia. Hey, if you want something done right....The problem is, he can't do anything right. I mean when he says that Al Qaida is the cause of our problems in Iraq just how ridiculous does he sound? Especially when his own CIA Director says that there are only about 1,300 Al Qaida fighters in Iraq. So let me get this straight, 1,300 hundred fighters causing all this trouble and blood shed? I don't think so Mr. President.

But hey, we are "staying the course" no "cutting and running" for our President. That's for those wimpy Democrats. No sir, this cowboy is finishing the job come hell or high water, because God is on his side, even if most of the people that God created isn't.

Before I go, it's nice to see Colin finally surface again. Yes Colin I hear you calling this a "civil war" now too. But where were you when it really mattered? You are a gutless fraud, and history will not be kind to you. You let your loyalties to a man who was not loyal to you ruin your credibility and your reputation with the American people, and that is something you will never get back.

And if Colin gets a jeer, well then newly elected Senator, Jim Webb, gets a cheer. If only for this exchange with the frat boy:

Frat Boy:"Hows your boy?"
Webb: "I'd like to get them out of Iraq"
Frat Boy: "That's not what I asked, how's your boy?" At which point Webb should have said: How is your partying daughters? Left any handbags in any foreign clubs lately? But instead he answered:
Webb: "That's between me and my boy"
Good enough, I will take that. Apparently Webb tried to avoid the photo ops and receiving line in the white house, but the frat boy still found him.

Good for Senator Webb, and as I have stated before: F**k bipartisanship!

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Forgive Him Jessie For He Knows Not What He Does

"...and us black folks are especially forgiving...I wouldn't be surprised if you are front and center in a Baptist church in South Central come this Sunday as a guest of the good reverend"

~Quote from the field on 11/21/06~

OK, I hate to say I told you so but.....So it wasn't South Central L.A. it was West L.A., the good reverend happened to be Jessie Jackson, and instead of a Baptist church it was a radio station; but you get the point. It never fails, get the right race leaders together, and play the contrition card. I am sure the handlers around Michael Richards (AKA Kramer) told him just what the strategy was to get out of his little racism problem, and he has been working it to a tee. Soon, he will be hosting "Live at the Apollo" and will probably have a guest stint hosting 106 & Park on BET.

So anyway, there he [Richards] was on the radio with our self proclaimed leader, Jessie Jackson, saying how sorry he was. Of course, other race hustlers were there as well. Two men from the local NAACP were front and center, and weighing in on the controversy to say what they thought was in old Kramer's heart, and how far along they thought he had come like Saul on the road to Damascus.

Is it me, or does it seem like black folks are the only ones who have these all these self proclaimed spokes- people and leaders for our race? So Jessie Jackson, and a couple of leaders from the NAACP forgave you, but I don't forgive you Kramer. My black ass still thinks that you are a racist, and I am willing to bet that about 90% of the black people in this country feel the way I do. So getting out front and center with the race pimp, Jessie, won't cut it in my book, and it sure ain't gonna cut it with other black folks out there.

The sad thing about this is that America doesn't see the big picture. All they saw was Jessie and his minions in that radio station talking to Richards, and they thought, it's OK, all is right in our wonderful harmonious America again. One of us made a slip, but the good reverend on behalf of the other black folks forgave him, so it's alright, we can push this unfortunate little episode to the side until the next one. Give me a break! And honestly, is anyone surprised that Jessie has made such a good living pimping the race issue? Think about it! If you are a high profile white company or person, who do you call? Why Jessie of course, because the main stream media-damn I hated using that term-always has the camera and the microphones in his face. So my man Jessie will always be there when they call. And guess what, the call ain't gonna be free.

But I am not mad at Jessie, I am mad at the rest of us black folks for not letting America know that the good reverend doesn't speak for all of us on matters of race. Just like Oprah being on T.V. with all her millions of dollars and fans doesn't represent or speak for other black women out there. I know it's hard, because when something effecting black folks or black issues go down, white America finds Jessie, or Al, and the other usual suspects. What's sad is that I bet those NAACP leaders with Jessie in that radio station today, spent more time picking out what suits they were going to wear, than what type of strategy to coordinate with their members on how to address this issue. As a result, they ended up not speaking for black folks as a collective, but for just a few us with their own self promoting agendas.

So good luck Michael, now that you are well on your way to not being a racist again. All that's left is for Al to clear you. As soon as that goes down, you will be able to mingle with your black friends just like before.

Isn't America beautiful?

Friday, November 24, 2006

"Black Friday"

Well, another turkey day in the books, and we Americans have once again given thanks for all that we have been blessed with here in the home of the (some) free and the land of the brave. I, like everyone else, ate my fair share of turkey, and gave my thanks to the creator for all that he (or she) has blessed me with. So excuse me if I go back to the real world now.

I want to start with this immoral and senseless war taking place in Iraq. Because while we were chomping down our turkeys, and stuffing our already fat guts with gravy and cranberry sauce, over 160 Iraqis were blown to bits in yet more sectarian violence in Iraq. It would be way too easy to me to jump all over the frat boy again. After all, this is his war, and for better or for worse. No scratch that. There is no better here. This war has defined the frat boy's Presidency and he will go down in history along with James Buchanan, as the worse President to ever lead our republic. But again, jumping all over the frat boy would be too easy.

I want to focus on those who were complicit in allowing this illegal and immoral war to take place. Those of you in the media, and the opposition. The people who were charged with looking out for the interest of the American people, and not letting our democracy get hijacked by a bunch of neo cons in back rooms, and a high profile television station (masquerading as a news agency) with token Negroes, blond bimbos, and fancy graphics and trailers. Yes, you have all failed us. The press was silent, and looked the other way, while the frat boy and his minions dared us to challenge him. Dared us to call him on his lies and deceit. And dared us to scream at the top of our lungs that the Emperor had no fuck***g clothes. The opposition party failed us. They were too busy trying to read the polls, too busy trying to get reelected, and too busy not wanting to be seen as unpatriotic and all too willing to "cut and run".

So thumbs down to you Hilary for your gutless stance and your vote for this war. I hope the voters in the Democratic primary never let you forget. And all the triangulation in the world won't allow you to take back that vote. The sad thing is,we know you didn't mean it, we know you are smarter that that, and you knew this war was ill fated and wrong from the jump. But we also know that you are a political animal, and your political instincts-like your husband-always trumps your convictions. So we weren't surprised when you took a position that you thought would be popular. Well, it's not popular anymore, and I am enjoying watching you try to use pretzel logic to justify your initial stance, and your sudden change of heart when you see that America has finally seen that the Emperor is naked. "I voted for this war but not for the way this war has been prosecuted..." Well f**k you! I hope the Democrats vote for your opponents and your sorry ass never makes it out of the primary. But it's not only Hillary, it's most of her democratic colleagues, I am only picking on her because she is the standard bearer for the party right now.

But maybe I am being too hard on the former first lady. To be fair, we all were somewhat complicit, we all were afraid to be called unpatriotic, and we all were afraid to seem like we were not supporting our troops. Of course, if you were like your truly, and actually had loved ones who were put in harms way, and who left their blood and a pieces of their body over in Iraq, you would know better. I heard from the horses mouth that it was a fu**#d up war, and that many of the soldiers over there knew it. That they were walking around like sitting ducks while the criminals running things played political games with the war and with their lives. That they wanted the war questioned, because it was the only way that those on charge of prosecuting it would see the error of their ways.

So here we are three years later, almost 3,000 of our precious young men have lost their lives, and billions and billions of our tax dollars have gone down the drain, and still, there is no end in sight. Over 100,000 Iraqi civilians dead(650,000 if you believe one recent estimate) A war that is supposed to be fighting terror is creating nothing but terror for those poor Iraqi women and children. How pathetic is the frat boy? Now he has sent daddy's friends to find a solution to help bail him out, and daddy was moved to tears to defend his incompetent son at a recent conference in the Middle East. But again, it's too easy to pick on him. He lost the midterms, his approval rating is still in the thirty percent range, and his scandal plagued party is in disarray. He is a lame duck in every sense of the word, and now when I see him I actually feel pity. (Damn I'm getting soft!)

So most of my ire today is directed at the American people. Maybe it's watching all those people dashing to the malls to spend more money on gifts, maybe it's my own sense of guilt at being so blessed while those children in places like Iraq, and Darfur are living a form of hell right here on earth. Maybe it's seeing how the media has made headline news out of the fact that Rosie O'Donnell and Kelly Ripa are feuding openly about an incident that took place on Ripa's show. I mean really, who gives a f**k? But this is America for you, so shallow, so happy, and so focused on all the wrong fuck**g things!

So today is "Black Friday"; but for me, it's black Friday for totally different reasons than it is for you. And as I watch the funeral procession pass through those Shiite slums, and those poor people burying their dead one after another; I suspect it's "black Friday" for them too. But unlike you and me, they won't be getting any deals at Wal-Mart anytime soon.

***Before I go, you might have noticed I changed my logo. Yes folks that good Maroon fighter I was using was lifted from another source. (Given my profession I should have known better than doing such a thing) So anyway, rather than face a lawsuit down the road, I decided to use my own likeness. I will miss my Maroon fighter but this was the best and safest way to go.

Besides, all that time spent in the gym should be good for something ;)

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

You Nig*#*s Can't Take A Joke?

Like I wasn't going to comment on this story. OK, so we all know by now how my man Michael Richards, AKA "Kramer", watched one too many episodes of Def Comedy Jam, and thought he could go on stage and drop the "N" word over and over to a bunch of hecklers. Those few moments might have cost Richards whatever future he had left in show business. Because, as it has been proven time and time again; America does not like an open racist.

No sir, our racist have to be like our gays used to be; in the closet. And once they cross that line and have a total melt down like old "Kramer" did, they are toast! I guess "Kramer" just couldn't take it anymore, and he made enough "f&%k you" money from doing Seinfeld that he could afford to blow up a career at this stage in his life. Hey, the guy probably figured; "what the f*&k I am sick of hiding my true feeling, I will tell these niggers and every one else what I really feel". Imagine how liberating that was for him. Yeah, sure he had to go on Letterman and play the game. "I am not racist that's what was so insane about it..." hey, "Kramer" your fingers are crossed. But he had to do it, if only for Jerry and the rest of the crew who still have careers to think about.

"I am sick over this. I'm sure Michael is also sick over this horrible horrible mistake" MISTAKE!! Like WTF? Come on Jerry, you are smarter than that. You know and I know that Kramer's ass didn't make a mistake, he spoke how he felt. And you know what, I say good for him. I wish more Americans would be as honest as "Kramer". I think we would all be better for it. Can you imagine after Kanye famously declared: "George Bush doesn't care about black people" Our commander in Chief stepping up to the plate and saying: "Damn right I don't care about you black mother f&*%#rs, why should I? You don't vote for me anyway". We would then all be like that poor white lady in the audience at the "Laugh Factory" who can be heard saying:" Oh my God", when "Kramer" went after those two "brothers" heckling him. How can our President say that? But I bet Bush would feel a lot better about himself. "Yeah Laura, I told those black motherf*&%#@s, I am so sick of their sh*&"! How liberating.

Don't worry "Kramer", yes, I think your career is essentially over in this comedy business. But look at the bright side: you can always perform at the Republican Convention every four years. Or, at NASCAR events; heck, you could even open for George "macaca man" Allen when he tries to make a comeback. So all is not lost. Just make the rounds like Mel Gibson did, get a few more house Negroes like George Wallace to come out and support you, and you will be fine. We are a very forgiving country, and us black folks are especially forgiving. -I wouldn't be surprised if you are front and center in a Baptist church in South Central come this Sunday as a guest of the good reverend- Now white folks, I am not too sure about. Because I have written about this before, and if there is one thing white folks hate, it's when another white person is dumb enough to let the world know what many of them think about us black folks. Some things you just don't say in public "Kramer", all those Seinfeld scripts must have fried your brain. No wonder we never saw black folks on Seinfeld, I guess you didn't want them around you huh.

I could go on and on about this, but it's too easy, and frankly, I am sick of all the faux outrage and the non stop media blitz. Word of advise to the next comic that tries ethnic humor, make sure that sh** is funny, and as one of my white colleagues told me; remember the golden rule: It's cool to make fun of your own race, and if you go after another race, make sure the sh*& is true. Like when Italian comic, Don Marero, [sic] goes after black folks with that ink pen routine: No, I am not going to tell you the joke. But why do we say sh*% like "ink pen", as if there is any other kind?

"They're going to arrest me for a calling a black man a nigger".....

"Fifty years ago we'd have you upside down with a fucking fork up your ass"

Fifty years ago that sh*& would have been funny to some folks, but it ain't funny now Michael, not to the folks that count. And they might not arrest you, but they sure are going to punish your ass for opening old wounds.

Anyway, I am going to rent some old Seinfeld episodes now, I want to see the few scenes with black folks and Kramer interacting. Hey maybe we are not giving Michael Richards credit for one thing. The guy must have been a really great actor.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

A Holiday Cheer!

"You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch you really are a heel, you're as cuddly as a cactus, you're as charming as an eel Mr. Grinch"

I hate this time of year! Yes, I said it, I hate Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, and all of the cheep crass commercialism that comes with these holidays. From the turkey to the firecrackers I hate em all. I don't even know how I came to this. Maybe it's my cynical jaded mind, maybe it's the fact that I don't have children, and maybe I just hate waiting in line behind ten people to buy one fu*&%ng bottle of Faconnable cologne!

I realized all this of course while standing in line at Nordstrom to buy my aforementioned cologne. Watching all the hustle and bustle in the store, listening to the kids as they run from one store to another-in what I think is the second or third largest mall in the world, King of Prussia- and just the over all madness of the season, makes me which Valentines Day was already here.

Like what is it with Americans and Christmas holidays anyway? I mean we lose our f*&%*ng minds every year about this time. Did you hear all the stories about the fights, the shootings, and the people camping out over night for days at a time to get a freaking PlayStation 3 ? "Yes little Johnnie, I got you that PlayStation you wanted for Christmas, Daddy got shot, but it's just a flesh wound. How is your Mom? I haven't seen her in three days". Want to know why we are going to lose the war on terror? I will tell you why: Because while little Johnnie is losing his mind over a freaking play station game, little Ahmed is reading the Koran over and over in one of those madras schools in Saudi Arabia some damn where. Meanwhile, back at Nordstrom, I wait, and wait, and wait......

It wasn't always like this; as a child I loved Christmas, loved looking at the presents under the tree, loved listening to that Jackson 5 Christmas album over and over again, loved the smell of sorrel, and Jamaican rum cake cooking in my mother's kitchen. Heck, I will never forget the first time I saw snow, it was around the Christmas season and it was perfect! I thought I was really living in Santa's hometown, and he would come slaying down my block with a sled full of toys Christmas morning. So my disdain for these holidays has nothing to do with any child hood pathologies I might harbor, or some type of secret vile unexplained anger towards Jolly Old St. Nick.

I don't know, maybe it's the Thanksgiving part of the season I don't like. Because it's exclusively an American holiday, I did not experience Thanksgiving until my family moved to America. My parents got into it a because they did not want us to be left out. So I had my fair share of turkey, cranberry sauce, and the whole bit while growing up. But as I got older, and started to think about it, I started thinking about those poor Indians at Plymouth Colony back in 1621. Chief Massasoit and his Wampanoag tribe embracing the English settlers, and sharing that Thanksgiving meal with them after a wonderful harvest; only to have his tribe slaughtered some fifty years later during the Prince Phillip Wars by those same English settlers. Yeah, that's the cynic in me again, instead of thinking about how thankful I should be, I keep thinking about those damn Indians.

You're a monster Mr. Grinch, your heart's an empty hole. Your brain is full of spiders, you've got garlic in your soul Mr. Grinch"

After about 20 minutes -no kidding- of waiting I am thinking of just leaving the damn cologne and heading up I76; but then I would have wasted 20 minutes of my life in Nordstroms for nothing. Besides, this isn't a gift, it's for me, and I really want it. "Sir, I will take you now" Geez! About freaking time. "Will that be cash or credit sir?" Cash! "Have a happy holiday, and thanks for shopping at Nordstroms department store."

Yeah whatever!

"You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel."

Thursday, November 16, 2006

I Will Take My Chances In Philly

Right wing fanatics never cease to amaze me. And now the latest from the minds of those that live in the bizzarro world known as the right wing blogosphere: Here is the latest proclamation from one of their more popular bloggers, a gentleman blogging over at Wizbang known as Alexander K. McClure. It seems that Mr. McClure has come to the conclusion that Baghdad is not much more dangerous than my adopted city of Philadelphia. According to Mr. McClure, Baghdad only has three (3) times more murders than Philadelphia, and for a war torn country that ain't so bad. The not too funny Mr. McClure tried to make a joke out of Philadelphia's murder rate by writing: "Isn't this a quagmire? Isn't it time to consider pulling out?" This of course, is just another example of those on the right trying to make a sick twisted attempt to justify this war. Just recently, Iowa Republican, Steve King, claimed that living in Washington D.C. was just as dangerous as living in Baghdad. Yeah, I guess when you are from Iowa it can feel that way. But seriously folks, to read this type of twisted logic, and then to read the posts that followed, -making fun of the murders in Philly as if over 350 of their fellow Americans losing their lives is something to laugh at- made me realize that we are not at war with terrorist, we are at war with some of our own sick psychopathic fellow Americans. F*&K it, we have our own civil war going on right here in this country.

Anyway, I am looking at the statistics, and it reads like this: Baghdad 53,200 killing per year, Philly, about 350 killings per year,and at the rate we are going now, maybe closer to 400 this year. So let's break that down a little; Baghdad, mmmmm about one hundred and seventy seven (177 ) murders or killings a day. Philly, approximately one (1) killing per day. So yeah, I think Baghdad is worse. I mean clearly worse, which begs the question: why do right wingers want to put down cities in their own country to make them seem as dangerous as a city half way around the world in the middle of a war? Well one reason is, that most of these people don't even consider cities like Philadelphia part of THEIR America. Philly, and cities like it, is an urban jungle, with animals running around killing each other; a fungus in the in the middle of this beautiful land called America. Infested with crack addicts, drug dealers,stick up kids, and welfare mothers. I would imagine, a place to be bombed, just like Baghdad, if they had their way. Gotta over throw that Mayor Street, and create a green zone right in the middle of City Hall. Street, and the Mayors of Detroit, and St.Louis represent an axis of evil. Their cities must be stopped.

But seriously, are there problems in Philly, and is Philadelphia a dangerous city? You bet it is. Anytime you have six murders in one weekend, a woman shot to death in her wheelchair, a four year old caught in a cross fire after a nineteen year old and a thirteen year old were shooting it out like the OK corral; we have a problem. My stance on the crime wave in this city has been pretty consistent from day one. We need to get rid of our current police chief, and put someone in there that knows what the hell he or she is doing. And, we need to confront this problem head on. Larry Platt, the Editor of "Philadelphia Magazine", made a good point recently. He said: "This is not a North Philadelphia problem, it's a Philadelphia problem, and we need to tackle it head on." Of course he was forced to make this statement after Ed Grose, the President of the Philadelphia Hotel Association called on all the Center City hotels to pull "Philadelphia Magazine" -which was doing a feature on our murder rate here in Philly as their cover story- from their night stands. Mr. Grose did not want our visitors to our city of brotherly love scared and fearing for their lives every time they walked out of their hotel room. Never mind that just two of the three hundred and forty or so murders this year were committed in Center City. Apparently he was expecting a lot of republicans.

So back to Baghdad. Honestly, if it's between Baghdad and Philly, I think I am going to stay right where I am. I know I can get jacked walking through Southwest or North Philly in the middle of the night. But damn, I don't think I could be sitting at my desk in the middle of the day, and a convoy of cars loaded with thugs from the hood would come in and kidnap me and one hundred and fifty of my co-workers. Or, I don't think I have to tattoo my name and address on my body so that when I am blown to bits by a suicide bomber-you know, one of those disgruntled Eagles fans-I won't have to worry about my loved ones identifying my body in the morgue. Or, the trash on the side of the street blowing me to smithereens when I go to pick it up because it's an IED. Yep, looks like Philly for me folks.

The sad thing is, not one of these cowards talking about Baghdad not being much worse than Philly would spend a minute let alone a full tour in that God forsaken place. Yeah, ask some of those brave soldiers over there who are putting their lives on the line every day where they would rather be. I am guessing, that even with our proximity to Jersey, they are going to say Philly. And to compare 53,000 killings to 400 in a given year is insanity. I don't care if Baghdad has five and a half million people to our one and a half million. It's still a ridiculous comparison.

But this is what happens when extremes take over, we get these types of ridiculous pronouncements and statements. Hey, desperate people do and say desperate things. And to say that Baghdad is not much more dangerous than the "city of brotherly love" sounds pretty desperate to me. Like I can get a good cheese steak in Anwar Province.

"Isn't it time we consider pulling out?"

That's the problem Mr. McClure, your President and his ilk pulled out of our cities a long time ago.

**Oh, and before I go, I want to send some love to A.I. (Allen Iverson), for picking up the cost of the funeral of the young man who was shot three years ago for not giving up his A.I. jersey. The brave young man-Kevin Johnson- was just recently taken off a life support after suffering irreparable brain damage when his breathing machine failed. Another touching thing about this story, is that the young man forgave the men that would ultimately kill him before he died.

Yes Mr. McClure, you can find that type of courage and grace in Philly. But I bet it's no where to be found on Wizbang!

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Playing Hooky

It's Tuesday morning, and I am playing hooky from my real job so that I can finish this motion to file in time for my side hustle. Hopefully, the "man" won't send the "slave catchers" out to get me. The fact that I am here blogging instead of doing my damn work ought to tell you how this little exercise is working out. I mean I am trying to concentrate, but I can't. I have been up since six o'clock this morning, sat in my basement and watched a DVD of Akeelah and the Bee. (cried all through that bad boy; what's up with that?) And still, I can't settle in to do my work. Yes folks, I feel like my friend the house negro today. Then, like a fool, I have the radio on in the background. And of course, wouldn't you know, it's on one of those powerful AM stations that broadcasts conservative talk all day. (Hey, I gotta know what the enemy is thinking) So I have that back ground noise to contend with on top of my over-all malaise.

So anyway, I am listening but not listening -if you know what I mean- to conservative talk on the radio, and I can just imagine what they are saying:

~~It's Cal from Ocean City, go ahead Cal: Yeah, I just saw where they had that monument dedicated to King in our Capital yesterday. Did our tax dollars pay for that?
No Cal, fortunately, that was paid for by Martin Luther Coon's....I mean King's old fraternity, Alpha Phi Alpha, who made a proposal to have it built back in 1986. And they actually got their own private funding to do it. Of course, you know that the first black President signed the legislation permitting that travesty in 1996. So once again, we have Clinton to thank for pandering to blacks
and further dividing our country. Yeah, well as long as our tax dollars didn't pay for it, but then I wonder why it has to be where it is, couldn't they put it in one of those cities where they have a Martin Luther King Drive or something? Hey, I agree with you Cal, it seems like a waste of space. Lord knows we have enough memorials in Washington. And to see Bush down there with those people like Jessie and Al Sharpton, no wonder we lost the mid-terms. Thanks for the call Cal. Who do we have next? Yeah Barbara from Bensalem, go ahead Barbara, you are on WKKK conservative talk radio. Yes hi, I was wondering when my husband and I will be able to go into the city of Philadelphia again, we are terrified of all the murders and the crime. What is wrong with those animals, they are just killing each other like flies. Well Barbara, this is what happens when you are soft on crime like these Judges in Philadelphia. They give those thugs a slap on the wrist, and they are back on the street in no time. I know, my God! I see where some students were shot near St. Josephs University, and one man was killed in Center City, it's just not safe any where anymore. Well this is the problem Barbara, the crime is getting closer to decent law abiding citizens like you and me. If it stays in their neighborhoods, I don't think it would be too bad, but when it starts affecting our every day life, well then we have a problem. Thanks for the call. We are going to take a break but when we come back, I want to talk about Rudy Gulliani running for President, and what it could mean for Italian Americans. Hey, they already have the Speaker of the House, a couple of justices on the Supreme Court, could a President be next? Stay tuned~~~~

OK, I am willing to try this again.- the work thing- That would mean no blogging, but here I am still typing away and posting on my blog. Yep, I am officially addicted to this sh*#. Or maybe there is just so much going on that needs to be addressed and written about that I can't concentrate on anything else until I get that off of my chest. Yeah, maybe that's it....damn it, I am hearing the radio again.

~~~Go ahead Vito. Yeah what's your problem with Italians? I will have you know that there is an Italian's signature on the Declaration of Independence, and we have contributed a lot to this country. Hell, we found this country. Have you ever heard of a little guy called Christopher Columbus? I see where people are talking about a black guy for President for crying out loud! Osama Obama or whatever his name is, and you mean to tell me we can't have an Italian? Hey, Vito, I hear you there big guy, but don't blame me. America just isn't ready for a President with a vowel at the end of his name if you know what I mean. Hey, I am half Italian, but I have to be honest; some guy in Alabama ain't voting for some guy named Gulliani for President. Don't for a minute think that those Soprano television shows and all those wise guy movies don't have an influence on people. Well it just seems like such a shame that people can be so closed minded and prejudiced. I know Vito, but this is what happens when you become the minority in your own country thanks to illegal immigration. You are right about that brother. Vito have a nice day. You too brother and keep telling it like it is. Tyrone in West Philadelphia, go ahead Tyrone you are on conservative talk radio. Yes, I just want to say, that I am republican, and I am very disappointed in black people for giving the democratic party ninety percent of our support. Tyrone are you African American? Yes I am. Well let me say this, you speak very well, and you articulate your point very well. I always love to hear an articulate African American like yourself. Well thank you, I try to pattern myself off the lives of great black republicans like Condi Rice, Thomas Sowell, and Ward Connerly. Well, those are all great people you mentioned, and they are great role models for you. Thank you. Tyrone, let me ask you; what do you think of affirmative action? I think it's terrible. We don't need anymore handouts, it's up to us as individuals to take responsibility for our own actions, and the consequences for them. I mean if you look around you, we have Oprah, Tiger Woods, and all these great African Americans; people embrace black people now, so there is no longer a need for laws forcing people to accept us. Well said Tyrone, we could use more blacks like you. Wasn't it Martin Luther King that said: "we should judge a man not by the color of his skin but the content of his character"? Yes, I believe it was~~~ CLICK

I know what the problem was; it was that damn radio. Now I think I can get off this blog and do some work.

I'm out!

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Musings & Rants From The Field

OK, so it's Sunday morning, and the field, as usual, is sneaking a peek at Massa's newspaper. Gotta see what's going on in the world, and around my fair city. As I glance over the headlines, I don't see any major news stories that grab my attention. Of course, this has been a week of mixed emotions for the field. I loved how the elections turned out,- America wiped that smug grin right off of the frat boy's face- but I am saddened by the passing of Ed Bradley, and Gerald Levert. Two people who were in my home so much via the television, and the sounds of Levert's music, that I almost thought of them as family.

My hometown paper, like many all over the country, is still analyzing the fallout from these past elections. They are calling it "the rise of the centrist", and the editorial writers are praising Rahm Emanuel for the job he did recruiting democratic candidates to run. There is also a little piece about my man, Henry Waxman, the 16 term Congressman from California,who will be heading the powerful Government Reform Committee. He has promised to look into frat boy's handling of Katrina, the prosecution of the war in Iraq, shady dealings at the EPA and the Food & Drug Administration, not to mention the Vice President's secret meetings with the energy cabal. Yep, if I were a republican official in Washington, I would make sure I have my lawyer on speed dial right about now. Cause Old Henry is going to be trying to Wax that ass. (I hope you caught that play on words)

Oh, and speaking of government officials; -Condi, I am going to get on your ass again- I see where our State Department vetoed the resolution criticizing Israels' action in the Gaza. Like WTF? John Bolton, who hopefully, will be relieved of his position soon, actually said; "it does not display an evenhanded characterization of the recent events in Gaza, nor does it advance the cause of Israeli-Palestinian peace". Really John? I thought you negotiated for two days to come up with this language? I thought countries like Argentina, France, Russia and Peru were all on board. And if we were not comfortable with the language, could we not have abstained like Britain, Denmark, and Japan? And we wonder why the animus towards the U.S. in the Middle East? Here is something the bad perm lady needs to understand: Most of our problems in the Middle East starts and ends with the Palestinian Israeli conflict. So Condi, you better get your sh*& together fast, or you will be jetting back to the Middle East again-bad perm and all- to avert another crisis.

More fighting in the Congo, and an all out civil war is about to break out as they await the results of the runoff elections between their two Presidential candidates. I am not surprised, Third World politics can be like that. If your party is in power, I don't eat, so I have to win by any means necessary. This is the type of politics I saw growing up in my beloved Island of Jamaica. So when people say that politics is a "blood sport" I always take that sh*& literally.

Mmmm, let's see what else? Patti Labelle's neighbor's are complaining about her dogs...the patrons of the arts in Philadelphia's philanthropic community are up in arms over the potential sale of a 68 million dollar painting; so who gives a f*&k? We move on. Now here is something; it seems there is now the potential for traditional gangs-bloods and crips- invading our fair city. As if the murder rate isn't high enough, now we have to worry about more of these ignorant ass animals running loose on our streets. You see folks,the gangs we have here in Philly are drug gangs, and each gang is usually concentrated in their own block or turf of the city. The average drug gang might have about ten members, and their only purpose is to make money from their drug sales. Now throw the bloods and crips into that mix, and we are sure to have some serious problems down the road. I can't say this enough: MR. MAYOR GET RID OF OUR POLICE CHIEF!!!

In the commentary section, the Philadelphia Inquirer focuses on the front runners in the upcoming 08 elections for the republican party. As it stands now, Mitt Romney, and John -Mr. straight talk express-McCain are the front runners. McCain launched an exploratory committee a few days ago which all but insures that he will run. And I am sorry, I am not feeling McCain at all. Yeah, yeah, I know he is a war hero, got shot down, was a prisoner of war, was tortured the whole bit. But I am not buying his phony ass straight talk bull s*&t. He is a triangulater just like all the rest of these politicians. Remember how he denounced people like Jerry Falwell for his intolerance, and then turned around and spoke at his University? Remember how he got trashed and slandered in South Carolina by the Bush people when they claimed he fathered a child with a..... gasp! Black woman. Now he and the frat boy are best buds. Then the hypocrite jumps all over John Kerry's misstatements about the troops to gain favor with the republican right. He knew he was running for President then, and in order to get out of a republican primary, he knows he has to be way right of most normal thinking people in this country. Oh, and wasn't he one of the original Keating Five? You remember them don't you? They gave aid and assistance to Charles Keating, who single handily destroyed the savings and loan industry in this country and ruined thousands of lives in the process. Think Enron on a larger scale, and with the government's blessings. Then he co-sponsors McCain-Feingold for campaign finance reform. Some people have no shame. And don't think I forgot how you referred to the Vietnamese as "gooks". You said then: "I will hate them as long as I live". Gotta love those classy words from you Senator, you fit in just fine with the republican party. Then their is your abominable voting record on civil rights issues, and on Darfur. And when Arlen Specter tried to get King George and his "signing statements" curtailed, you said: "I think the President will enforce the law". Well I think you will never be President, so don't waste your time running. Let's pull that "straight talk express" into the station for good right now!

I better stop reading this paper, I am getting worked up again, just thinking about all this sh*&.

Some lighter thoughts: Field you are on a deserted island with a DVD and CD player- fortunately you have electricity- You can have five CD's, five DVDs, five women, and five great thinkers from history.

The CD's: 1. Bob Marley & The Wailers-Catch A Fire 2. Bob Marley & The Wailers-Kaya 3. Michael Franks-Dragonfly Summer 4. John Coltrane-A love Supreme 5. Buju Banton-Voice of Jamaica/Rachelle Ferrell-Rachelle Ferrell-(Tied)

The Women: 1. Lark Voorhies 2. Debbie Morgan 3. Victoria Dillard 4. Toni Braxton 5. Lisa Raye

The DVDs: 1. Goodfellas 2.The Good The Bad & The Ugly 3.The Harder They Come 4. Bourne Identity 5. Glory/Dead Presidents-Tie

The Thinkers: 1. Michael Manley 2. Marcus Garvey 3. Malcolm X 4. W.E.B. Dubois/Steven Biko/Martin Delaney-Tied 5. My Dad/My Mom-Tied

Can the thinkers and women be on separate sides of the Island? I am still embarrassed to do certain things in front of my parents :)

**Before I go, I caught that Sacha Baron Cohen flick, Borat, last night, and I thought it was brilliant. Cohen is an interesting guy. He is very smart, -he attended Cambridge University- and he wrote s dissertation on Jews in the civil rights struggle. So he understands the nuances and complexities of American race relations. And of course, the hypocrisy of it. So I loved his movie! But of course, you know me, I love satire, so I couldn't help but love it. Anyway, after watching it, I came away with some impressions about some of our fellow Americans. First, they would rather have a pile of sh*& brought to their dinner table than a black person. Second, when white frat boys get drunk, they tell you what they really think about things like black folks and slavery etc. Hey, frat boys become leaders. Think about it! Third, black folks are more welcoming of strangers, and quicker to embrace them than white folks. Even the black folks that you are afraid of because of how they might look. And finally, we Americans are so self centered and narrow minded, that it's really easy to make fun of us. And yes folks, whether it's as Ali G, or as Borat; Sacha Cohen has been making fun of us for a long time.
The field is out.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Mission Impossible?

Ken Mhelman stepped down as RNC chairman yesterday, and the buzz around Washington is that the Republicans will offer the job to Michael Steel. That is, of course, if he doesn't take a job in the Bush cabinet as housing Secretary. Anyway, this is a move, I am sure, on the part of republicans to once again court the black vote. I mean they must look at election results time and time again, see that once again, they only got about 9% of the black vote, and pull whatever hair they have left, out. I can hear them in the back rooms now: "I know that guy Steele ran a pretty good race, and he is funny, upbeat, and telegenic. He is just the type of guy we need to reach out to the blacks" Now, they might or might not be right, and if he does takes the job, Mr. Steele just might be terrific at it.

But I have a few words of advise for Michael before he becomes the new black face of the republican party. -Sorry Condi- Your party has been despised by black folks all these years for a reason. Us black folks have this sixth sense about us, we can sense and see things that other people can't. And it has always proven to be an invaluable tool when it comes to telling us who our friends really are. Our sixth sense always tells us that your Republicans friends aren't our friend, and we aren't really welcome in your tent. Oh, you will tell us we are welcome, but somehow our sixth sense always says otherwise.

This is why no matter how much republicans try to reach out to us, it never works. Oh, we will politely tell them that we will consider voting for the republican candidate , but we never do. We will let you them our homes, and our space to tell us their position, but we ain't voting for them no matter what- At least 90% of us aren't. So Michael, this is what you will have to overcome, that sixth sense of ours that never seems to let us down.

Now, please don't get it twisted, it's not just the sixth sense. There are legitimate noticeable reasons for black folks turning against the republican party: Remember Ronald Reagan in Philadelphia, Mississippi, back in 1980, giving that infamous speech supporting states rights? Remember Nixon's 1968 "Southern Strategy? Remember Barry Goldwater opposing The Civil Rights Act of 1964? Remember Herbert Hoover? Remember republican strategist Lee Atwater's statement? "you start out in 1954 by saying Nigger,nigger, nigger, By 1968 you can't say nigger without it backfiring, so you say stuff like forced busing,states rights, and all that stuff" Mmmmmm, all that stuff huh Lee? Stuff like Willie Horton, "Harold call me", a black hand taking away a job from a white hand for Jessie Helms? But this is what you will be trying to overcome Michael, and the field is just trying to help you out. Hey, when your predecessor, Ken Mhelman, tried to apologize for the republican southern strategy, two of your biggest mouth pieces, Rush Limpboy, and Sean Hannety, denounced him.

So it's all uphill for you if you take this job Michael, and I don't know if you will be able to pull it off. You see how many black folks voted against you for the white democratic candidate in your own race don't you? This, even though you ran as far away from the frat boy as possible. That ought to tell you something: Party affiliation to the democratic party trumps even race with most black folks. So you just might want to think about that before you take the job.

Now don't get me wrong, I would love to see more black folks embracing the republican party. I, for one, do not believe that we should be monolithic in our voting. I would never want one party to take us for granted, as the democrats have done from time to time. Hey, Rosa Parks herself begged J.C. Watts to stay in Congress and represent the republican party. But hey, if it's not there it's not there. There is too much of a history here between us black folks and the party of Lincoln. Too much mistrust, too much ass given to kiss, too much David Dukes, Trent Lotts, and macaca men. And yes the Democratic Senator Robert Byrd was a former Klansman, and he did try to stymie the passing of crucial civil rights legislation in the sixties with a filibuster. But somehow black folks forgive him-it's that sixth sense again- and not Trent Lott. We never seem to forget the sh*& republicans do, but we give the dems a pass. Remember Clinton and Sistah Souljah? Of course you do; democrats can use us and get away with it, but republicans can't. Hey these old wounds were deep, and it will take a long time to heal. "Well there goes the South" I know LBJ, and it ain't been back ever since.

So good luck Mike, I really do hope you can make an impact among black folks. At least that sixth sense doesn't go off when we are around you. We really do feel like you are one of us, and that's a huge start.

****I would like to say RIP to two field Negroes who recently passed away.

Ed Bradley; sixty minutes was never enough for you my man. I loved the fact that you never forgot your Philly roots, and you kept it one hundred percent at all times.

Gerald Levert; Like your Pop, you had some serious pipes, and you left your people with some good ass music. The fields will be alive with the sounds of R&B tonight.

I'm out.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006


I am in a blue blue mood folks; not because of the rainy weather here in Philly, but because the people spoke loud and clear and threw some of the bums out. Yes folks, the elections are over, and the field is jigging just like his house negro friends right about now. Today, I am proud to be an American, proud of my fellow citizens for voting the rethuglican majority out of Washington, proud of the black voters in areas like Philly, St. Louis, and Richmond, for coming out and voting ideology over race. We- black folks- were not hoodwinked by republican plants like Blackwell, Swann, and Steele. {Mike, I do like puppies, but I just don't like your party} And we sent them packing to rethink their convictions and their soul.

So let's do a little election Monday morning quarterbacking shall we. Let's look at the worse republican giveaway since post Watergate in 1974. The republicans tried to make this election about values, and things like immigration to energize their base. After all, nothing like a little divisiveness to fire up the troops. Fortunately, no one was buying it, and quite a bit of their own base stayed home. -Covering up improper behaviour with senate pages will have that type of effect-Even white males, according to the exit polls, barely favored the GOP over the dems. All this added up to a long night for the grand old party.

Let's start with the field's home state of Pennsylvania. My man Lynn Swann got his ass kicked by fast Eddy-I told you so-up and down, and yes, I believe a primary would have helped him, but he still would have lost. Memo to republicans; just because your black candidate is charismatic, can string two words together, and you feel comfortable around him, does not mean that other black folks will vote for him. He has to have a grasp of the issues that effects us, and we have to sense that he genuinely wants top speak for those of us who do not have a voice. Until you can find that candidate, your outreach with these handpicked tokens will always come up a little short.

And let's not forget about my man Rick Sanitarium-which is where I thought he belonged in the last days of his race- Here is a guy who represented the worse in American politics. A divisive fear monger er, who intruded on a woman's death bed, and who wanted to ban the sale of birth control pills for crying out loud! Mr. Right Wing actually thought Pennsylvanians would send his slick K street ass back to Washington. Sorry Rick; maybe now you can work full time for your K street pals, or write another book. But don't worry, either way, you will be rolling in the dough. I am sure those mega churches will have you on their speaking circuit real soon too.

Some of what I said about Slick Rick applies to Area 51 man, Curt Weldon, as well. Mr. Weldon blamed his loss on the main stream media exposing his shady dealing on behalf of his daughter. Yeah shoot the messenger Curt! No Curt, you lost because you were corrupt, and if you saw the exit polls, corruption was on the minds of the voters this time around. So stop bitching-I saw your concession speech- and be a man and slink off to K street where you can join your pal Rick, and roll in that corporate dough.

Yes my friends, locally, it's been mostly blue around the field. Southeastern Pennsylvania went big time democrat, and I couldn't be happier. Now on a national level; I hate to say I told you so, but.....Harold, I told you so. There was no way those folks in Eastern Tennessee were going to make you their Senator. I don't care how much you found religion, how much you embraced hunting and the NRA, how hawkish you became, and how light your skin is; to them, you were just another Memphis n*&*#r who didn't know his place. And if they needed reminding, the RNC did just that with blondie in that little ad. Come on Harold, I know you don't think that it was a coincidence that your opponent starting gaining on you and left you in the dust after that little ad. do you? Harold, like your republican counterparts, you might need to come to the fields more often, and get a real lesson on race relations in some parts of this country.

Still no final word yet on macaca man. But if there is a God, he goes down like the rest of his sorry ass republican friends. No, not because he is a racist son of a b%#@*, but because he is a lying racist son of a b%#*@. And to think this guy almost became our President. And speaking of President, I hope the frat boy is getting some high priced lawyers together, because if people like my man John Conyers (D-Mich) has is way; there is going to be -as Ricky Ricardo used to say) "splaining to do" in Washington. Yes, when my man Henry Waxman (D-Cal) is through with you republicans and your big business friends, you will wish you never saw Washington D.C. Old Henry can be tough -remember what he did to big tobacco in 1994? Repeat after me folks; subpoena time! According to one Democratic aide on the hill, there are some "uninvestigated scandals" to look in to. Mmmmmm, does that mean that they are going to look into the frat boy's friends at Haliburten, and the energy companies, not to mention the CIA?
We can only hope and prey. I believe in bad people getting theirs, and there are some truly bad people in Washington, and around this President. Almost three thousand young men have died for a political war, and damn it, there should be some consequences for these clowns.

So Nancy, you go girl, I want investigations on top of investigations. I don't want you to be gracious, and I don't want you to reach across the isle. F*&% them! They never reached across to you, and had they won, it would have been business as usual. So please, let your committee chairmen like Waxman, and Conyers loose. I want investigations, and dare I say it; I even want you to look into..... well, you know, the "I" word. If only to scare the frat boy, and let him know that he can't just go around taking the rights away of Americans to get a few red state votes.
Yes Nancy, work on minimum wage, a new energy policy, health care issues, and a rock solid plan to bring our boys home. But don't forget to investigate these crooks for what they have done to our country over the past six years. I guess when you control all four branches of government you can get pretty drunk with power. But damn, could the republicans have put the bottle down just once.

Finally, I see where Donald Rumsfeld stepped down today. "rummy you are doing a heck of a job", oh wait, that was Brownie. But you get the idea. It took a mandate from the American people to get the frat boy to fire his incompetent Secretary of defense. {Condi you should be next} And of course, as is always the case when he is in trouble, the frat boy has brought in one of daddy's men-Bob Gates- to bail him out. Always listen to your father frat boy, you wouldn't be in this mess now if you did.

Anyway, the field has to go now. I am going to watch the FAKE NEWS NETWORK go into some conservative blogs, and listen to conservative talk radio for some laughs. I am really enjoying this!

Life is so good, I actually think I see a rainbow.

Monday, November 06, 2006



The polls open at 7:00 a.m. and stay open until 8:00 p.m., you can vote as long as you are in line by 8:00 p.m.

Remember! If you are voting for the first time in the election district, you must bring a PHOTO ID such as a driver's license,student ID or some other form of US or PA (or whatever state you are in) government issued ID or a US or your state government issued non-photo ID such as a voter identification card,or a current utility bill,bank statement,paycheck,or government check. If you do not have any acceptable ID you must be allowed to vote by provisional ballot.

If your right to vote is challenged at the polls on Election Day, you are in the right polling place, and the problem cannot be resolved by the judge of elections, you have the right to ask for and vote by provisional ballot. If it is later determined that you were eligible to vote, your ballot will be counted. You should be given instruction on how to determine if your vote was counted.

A nationwide , toll- free VOTERS' HOTLINE, 1-866-OUR-VOTE (687-8683),staffed by volunteer attorneys who provide free, multilingual assistance to help voters with questions about registration and voting, and assists voters turned away at the polls.

You can also shoot the field an e-mail at: if you have a problem. Trust me, I will be on that sh*% like Whitney on a crack pipe!
So again, please go out and vote. I would hate to think that all those people got their asses kicked in Selma on that faithful day for nothing.

***Oh, and before I forget. I would like to thank the A Phillip Randolph Institute Philly Chapter for this valuable information.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

A Few Of My Favorite Things

People always ask me why I am so angry; why all the negative posts, and the venom towards a certain...ahem ahem, President. So I thought about it, and you know what; with the election just two days away, and my rethuglican friends that much closer to losing one and possibly both houses of congress, life ain't so bad after all. Now if I wake up Wednesday morning and both houses of congress are still republican...well, the bridge police on the Benjamin Franklin had better be on high alert. Because the field might just jump off that bad boy.

So anyway, I figured I would post about some of the little things in the fields life that makes it worth getting up every day. So with my apologies to the Sound of Music; here are a few of my favorite things:

The Spring and Fall on the East Coast. I love feeling the weather change, and watching the colors change on the trees.

Pretty calves with no stockings.

Coltrane at 2:00 AM.

Listening to a preacher give a good sermon.

Watching the FAKE NEWS NETWORK when the White House f#@#s up.

Festival and fried fish from Middle Quarters in St. Elizabeth Jamaica.

Halftime at a SWAC football game.

The PCH1 in December.

People watching at the airport.

Playing 18 holes with my homey and fellow yawdie John.

Hanging with my boys in Louisiana.

Mandeville, Jamaica. (If there is better year round weather anywhere in the world, I would like to know just where it is)

Boat House Row in Philadelphia.

An A.I. crossover. (I could watch that Michael Jordon clip over and over)

The feeling I get when I am in court.

Opelousas women.

Watching Saved By The Bell reruns. (it's a Lark thing))

A good political debate with someone whose opinion I respect. (My sister comes to mind)

Watching Jet Li kick some ass on the big screen.

Watching Denzel act his ass off.

Reading other people's blogs. (You can learn so much)

The California sunset.

That burning sensation I always feel after a good workout.

Old City Philadelphia.

Black Women.

Putting my thoughts on paper.

Marley in the morning. (It's better than breakfast)

The rain when I'm in bed.

Milk and cookies.

Acing someone in tennis.

Oxford Road in London.

Anywhere in New York or DC.

My Italian and Irish friends in Philly. ( I owe a great deal of my knowledge about how white folks really think to them)

Soccer played the Brazilian way.

Ackee and salt fish for breakfast.

Main street in Manayunk.

Any Jamaican restaurant in West Philly.

Women over fifty who look like they could be thirty five.

Datsun 280-z's

My 1986 Jeep Wrangler CJ. (Even if it's always in the shop)

Hip hop music.

Haitian art.

Amish baked goods.

Hiking through Fairmont Park.

Bicycling along Kelly Drive.

Leaving New Jersey.

"When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I am feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite
things, and then I don't feel so bad."

Damn I hope I can sing that song come Wednesday morning.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

"W" And The Finger

I have come to the sad realization that I have some serious issues with the leader of my country. No, not his policies, or his aw shucks demeanor and lack of intellectual curiosity. -That's well documented- But with the man on just a personal level. I have always been able to separate the President's bumbling domestic policies and his disastrous foreign policies from the man himself. But no more, they have now, in my mind, morphed together to become one. And what made me realize this fact, was a little incident that supposedly happened in my sister's hometown of Seattle.

It's like this: There is a 43 year old bus driver from Seattle, who is suing the school district to get her job back after being fired for giving "W" the finger. You heard me right; she allegedly gave the leader of the free world the finger, while he was allegedly waving at some school children in her bus. According to the Seattle Times story, the frat boy was campaigning with congressman Dave Reichert when the little incident allegedly occurred.

I can hear the frat boy now: "Dave, did you see that? I think that bus driver just gave me the bird? That little mother f*&%#r gave me her middle finger! And here I was just trying to wave to the kids!" Of course we all know what happened next. The congressman called the school superintendent-Janet Barry- who called the poor bus driver in to tell her the bad news. You're fired! According to superintendent Barry; "This was part of a pattern of behavior with this particular bus driver, not an isolated incident" Ahhh yeah sure. So what you are saying superintendent Barry, is that if this was any Joe citizen this bus driver would have been fired? "If the bus driver had made the gesture to a driver who cut her off on a local road, we would have taken the same action" Really Ms. Barry? So the fact that you and the congressman go way back to his days as King County sheriff, and he personally called to tell you what frat boy stated happened, had nothing to do with your decision huh?Mmmmm. Ms. Barry, here is something that you might want to consider in the future: Just because you are the Superintendent of a school district in a major city, please don't assume that everyone else is stupid. Because quite frankly, you are full of sh&*. And this from district spokeswoman Sara Niegowski: "The bus driver was not terminated for making an obscene gesture at the president. The bus driver was terminated for making an obscene gesture in view of the students...That's not the role modelling we need for our students: Fair enough point Sara, but can I hear from just one of the students that saw this little incident, or even their mama or daddy?

Anyway folks, so now you have the story. And here is what makes the field know that he has some issues. The bus driver's representative, Chris Dugovich, had this to say: "There is only one individual who say this and that happens to be the President of the United States".....Mmmmm good point there Chris. How come none of the kids on the bus saw this little bird being flipped? How come no one in the motorcade or in the limousine with the frat boy saw the bird being flipped? Do you think our frat boy could be lying on this poor 43 year old bus driver from the land of Starbucks Chris? Let me answer that for you Chris: Yes I do. Sad isn't it, when you believe some 43 year old school bus driver over your President. But hey, this is what it's come to with me and this man. Anyone who would lie about something as serious as an eminent threat to our country, or look at the devastation over New Orleans after Katrina and say: "Brownie you are doing a heck of a job" I dare say would lie about a school bus driver flipping him the bird.

So sorry folks, until I see or hear proof to the contrary, or until another witness comes forward; I say give the poor bus driver her job back. If only it's because we are talking about her word against the frat boys. And right about now, her word is looking allot better to me.

****Oh before I go, I hope everyone enjoyed their Halloween. But I have to tell you about some seriously spooky behavior here in the city of... ahem ahem, "brotherly love". It seems there is a practice in certain white ethnic neighborhoods to do their neighborhood trick or treating on separate nights than the rest of the population. The reason, to keep the little black kids from the black neighborhoods out. And are you ready for this? This is often organized by the various Catholic churches from the parishes in these neighborhoods. So what do the whites in these enclaves do on Halloween night? Well, they turn off their lights and don't answer the door that's what. Isn't "brotherly love" great?

I had one of my white friends complain to me today, that he had a single black mother come to his house and ask for candy for her child who she had to leave back at her house because he was sick. Of course, he says, he didn't give it to her, because he knew a hustle when he saw one.
Folks, I am not making this up. {Like a few extra pieces of candy was going to make or break her} When I asked how he felt about the church having separate days for the kids in the parish, he said he is going to join them next year, and turn his lights off and not give out treats like everyone else. "No offense field, but I get tired of the vans and buses from North and West Philly {black neighborhoods} coming with all the kids to trick or treat in our neighborhood. Don't they have candy in the black neighborhoods?" After counting to ten~~~"yes they do, but maybe they want to make an outing out of the Halloween experience" "But field....come on....we have to keep the neighborhood safe for our kids too."......

Spooky indeed!

The field is out.