White people please just say no to the "N" word.

So now that we know what the FAKE NEWS people have on Jessie (seems he dropped the "N" word while talking about his "O"ness), I want to talk about this issue for a minute. Not Jessie, he is irrelevant as far as black folks are concerned. So the FAKE NEWS folks can go ahead knock themselves out with their tape of Jessie saying "nigger" while talking to another black man, that is a none issue with moi. ---although I do recall the good Rev. condemning the use of the "N" word.-- So Jessie is a hypocrite, tell us something we don't know.

No, tonight I want to ask my white friends who are regulars to the fields to give me a little insight into the white psyche. Here is my question: Why do some white folks get upset because black folks can use the word "nigger" to each other, and they can't? (At least not in public) Honestly, what's up with that shit? Today on the "View" they almost came to blows because the conservative co-host (Elisabeth Hasselbeck) wanted to know what's up with the double standard? "How are we supposed to move forward if we keep using words that bring back that pain?" She wanted to know. Don't worry Elisabeth, we have moved on from the word. So much so that we call each other the word now. We don't have to do shit. You just try not to use it, and we will be cool. And of course I have to give props to the sisters on the view. They were not pleased. Whoppie and girlfriend had the look didn't they? Sisters you know the one. The one that says I am about to take off these earrings and slip off these pumps, and "commence" to start whooping (no pun intended) on that ass any minute now.

But the shit is frustrating. White folks, I know it seems unfair, but there are just some things some people can say that you can't. Well, you can, but at your own risk; if you know what I mean. I don't care how close you think you are to your black friend, do not fuck up and call him [or her] that word. Look, I have quite a few Italian friends, and I don't for a minute think that I can call them the "G" or the "D" word, I just don't. In fact, the shit never crossed my mind. And contrary to what I have heard people say in the past, other ethnics do use slurs to describe each other, and you don't hear us black folks going around saying; Why is it okay for you people to call each other names but it's wrong if we do it?

Now personally, I have used the word in the past, but it's no longer a part of my vocabulary (unless I am writing something to make a point) . But the word doesn't bother me like it does some people (unless a white person says it), and I laugh my ass off at comedians like Kat Williams when they use it ---So sue me--. I have seen proprietors of some blogs lose their natural minds if someone slips up and uses the word, and I always have to wonder why. Is it because they are afraid that some white folks will say that they read it on their blogs, and now it's open season on the "N" word? Give me a break.

Look, if you don't like the word, or if it offends you, don't use it. But please folks, don't give white folks a pass to use it because other black folks use it to each other. And when certain white folks(present company excluded of course) get mad at black folks for using the word because they can't use it, what does that tell you? I will tell you what it tells me: It tells me that they want to use it on your black ass, but they can't, because it isn't PC. And that's just so frustrating. It's a double standard field, you know it is. No one should be allowed to use the word, black or white. If it's a bad word, it's a bad word when black people use it, and when white people use it, why differentiate. And all that sounds so logical that I almost don't have a come back for it.......almost.

It is a double standard, but folks in the majority created it. They used the word against us for years. Used it to demean belittle, and to humiliate. Now it's not cool for them to use it anymore because society would like to keep such things hidden away. Oh, some of you still say it, but never in public. And now black folks use it too, but to each other. And in most cases as a term of endearment, and for whatever reason, for many black folks, (especially the younger ones) it has become damn near a part of their language. So now you are upset, because you see some of us using it, and you wonder why you can't use it too.

But hey, you can still use the word if you are so inclined. It's a free country. Just be careful, because you never know who might be listening.

Eddie and the "N" word

I was going to just make Eddie Griffin's stupid ass my house Negro of the day. But then I had too much to say to squeeze it all into my side bar.

It seems that Eddie was dropping the "N" word a bit too much for the folks from "Black Enterprise Magazine, and Earl Graves himself came on stage after Mr. Coon got the hook. (You know Earl don't you? He is the guy with the funny side burns) Now all this begs the question: just why the hell did they invite this walking minstrel show to do a stand up routine? Didn't they see any of his movies? Sometimes I really have to wonder about black folks. Do you mean to tell me that they could not have found a G rated comic who also happened to be funny, to perform? Or couldn't they have gotten a singer or some shit? I am sure quite a few very good musical acts would have performed for less than what Eddie Griffin charged them.

I blame Eddie Griffin for being ignorant, but I also blame the folks at Black Enterprise for not being smart enough to get another act as well. It reminds me of what my Catholic friends at Vanilla-nova University did recently, when they hired a comic named Steve Trevino. According to the University, Mr Trevino was so raunchy and insensitive, that they had to cut his act short. So Vanilla-nova, like the folks at Black Enterprise, deserve to be called out for not thinking of their audience first.

And for the record, I don't even support this "N" word ban. You just can't ban a fucking word! Should we use it so indiscriminately? Of course not. But should an artist be able to use it in a song, a play, a movie, or whatever? Of course they should. (Well, as long as it's a black artist) So you ban the word, do you think some racist white folks won't be saying nigger around the dinner table to their kids? Give me a break. You cannot ban or bury a word. Let's just teach our kids to respect themselves and their race. If they are young men, to respect their women, that's a start. I promise you if we were bringing up this generation of kids the way we should be doing it, we would not need to be talking about banning the "N" word. They would be just as turned off by the word as we are. Let's stress proper education, so that they will have more words in their vocabulary than nigger this, and nigger that. Because we all know what the kids, and those so inclined to use the word, are saying about this "N" word ban right. "Yeah, those niggers are crazy. Talkin bout banning a damn word, they can kiss my black ass." That's what they are saying, and will continue to say until they know better.

Now unfortunately, Eddie Griffin is one of those Negroes, and thankfully the Black Enterprise people cut his performance short. But there is one thing I know that wasn't short, and that was Eddie's check. Because thanks to people like the folks at Black Enterprise, that "nigger" is rich.

Oh, and before I forget, a note about the Black Weblog Awards. I would like to thank every one of my field Negro friends who voted for me, and made it possible for this site to win the popular vote for best political/news blog.

This sounds corny, but everyone who comments on this site deserves that award. Because honestly, some of you are deeper, and much more eloquent than I could ever be.

So thanks for coming to my site, and giving it some real gravitas. Because you and I both know that my bullshit alone wouldn't cut it.

"Die N-word..."

I see the NAACP and a few well meaning folks in Motown had a rather large funeral service for the "N-word" today. I sure hope they invited everybody in America and not just the folks up in Detroit. Not that they would have come. I am quite sure that most folks in America don't believe the "N-word" is dead just yet. In fact, I am pretty sure that lots of them (Black and White) will be trying to dig old "N-word" up and giving him mouth to mouth resuscitation, or some type of shock therapy treatment or some shit.

Anyway, I was wondering; how did we kill old "N-word" in the first place? I see the funeral was in Michigan, which is where Doctor Jack Kevorkian is from. Did "N-word" have an assisted suicide? --That would have been appropriate I guess, a kind of controlled death so that we all can know exactly when he checked out. Or did he just die of natural causes? (I doubt that one) Did the NAACP just strangle or shoot him or something? I mean these are all important questions, because we have to make sure that he is dead. If, for instance, we thought we poisoned him, and we didn't give him a strong enough dosage, we could go back to the grave site tom morrow and old "N-word" would be gone. Can you imagine the headlines? "The NAACP thought they buried the "N-word" but now his grave is empty. The venerable civil rights organization has put out an all points bulletin for the "N-word" and have solicited the help of John Walsh and the folks at America's Most Wanted to help capture him." OK, I admit it, that's a bit extreme. But you have to admit that "N-word" could be hiding in plain view and no one would even notice him.

That's the thing about "N-word"; he could be anywhere. In our neighbors home, our local school, a place of business, a local grocery store, or even in our church. The NAACP will search all the usual places of course. The rap recording studios, the red neck trailer park s down in Alabama, and all the right wing and republican blogs. But "N-word" will be nowhere to be found. He is just too well connected and too influential to hide out in all the obvious places. "N-word" has friends in high and low places, and when you have that type of clout, you can hide for a very ling time. So good luck NAACP. Let's hope that scenario doesn't play out. Let's hope that you really did kill the "N-word", and he is dead and buried for good.

"Die N-word and we don't want to see you 'round here no more."

I hear you. But a word to the wise; make sure you keep checking his grave from time to time.

You Nig*#*s Can't Take A Joke?

Like I wasn't going to comment on this story. OK, so we all know by now how my man Michael Richards, AKA "Kramer", watched one too many episodes of Def Comedy Jam, and thought he could go on stage and drop the "N" word over and over to a bunch of hecklers. Those few moments might have cost Richards whatever future he had left in show business. Because, as it has been proven time and time again; America does not like an open racist.

No sir, our racist have to be like our gays used to be; in the closet. And once they cross that line and have a total melt down like old "Kramer" did, they are toast! I guess "Kramer" just couldn't take it anymore, and he made enough "f&%k you" money from doing Seinfeld that he could afford to blow up a career at this stage in his life. Hey, the guy probably figured; "what the f*&k I am sick of hiding my true feeling, I will tell these niggers and every one else what I really feel". Imagine how liberating that was for him. Yeah, sure he had to go on Letterman and play the game. "I am not racist that's what was so insane about it..." hey, "Kramer" your fingers are crossed. But he had to do it, if only for Jerry and the rest of the crew who still have careers to think about.

"I am sick over this. I'm sure Michael is also sick over this horrible horrible mistake" MISTAKE!! Like WTF? Come on Jerry, you are smarter than that. You know and I know that Kramer's ass didn't make a mistake, he spoke how he felt. And you know what, I say good for him. I wish more Americans would be as honest as "Kramer". I think we would all be better for it. Can you imagine after Kanye famously declared: "George Bush doesn't care about black people" Our commander in Chief stepping up to the plate and saying: "Damn right I don't care about you black mother f&*%#rs, why should I? You don't vote for me anyway". We would then all be like that poor white lady in the audience at the "Laugh Factory" who can be heard saying:" Oh my God", when "Kramer" went after those two "brothers" heckling him. How can our President say that? But I bet Bush would feel a lot better about himself. "Yeah Laura, I told those black motherf*&%#@s, I am so sick of their sh*&"! How liberating.

Don't worry "Kramer", yes, I think your career is essentially over in this comedy business. But look at the bright side: you can always perform at the Republican Convention every four years. Or, at NASCAR events; heck, you could even open for George "macaca man" Allen when he tries to make a comeback. So all is not lost. Just make the rounds like Mel Gibson did, get a few more house Negroes like George Wallace to come out and support you, and you will be fine. We are a very forgiving country, and us black folks are especially forgiving. -I wouldn't be surprised if you are front and center in a Baptist church in South Central come this Sunday as a guest of the good reverend- Now white folks, I am not too sure about. Because I have written about this before, and if there is one thing white folks hate, it's when another white person is dumb enough to let the world know what many of them think about us black folks. Some things you just don't say in public "Kramer", all those Seinfeld scripts must have fried your brain. No wonder we never saw black folks on Seinfeld, I guess you didn't want them around you huh.

I could go on and on about this, but it's too easy, and frankly, I am sick of all the faux outrage and the non stop media blitz. Word of advise to the next comic that tries ethnic humor, make sure that sh** is funny, and as one of my white colleagues told me; remember the golden rule: It's cool to make fun of your own race, and if you go after another race, make sure the sh*& is true. Like when Italian comic, Don Marero, [sic] goes after black folks with that ink pen routine: No, I am not going to tell you the joke. But why do we say sh*% like "ink pen", as if there is any other kind?

"They're going to arrest me for a calling a black man a nigger".....

"Fifty years ago we'd have you upside down with a fucking fork up your ass"

Fifty years ago that sh*& would have been funny to some folks, but it ain't funny now Michael, not to the folks that count. And they might not arrest you, but they sure are going to punish your ass for opening old wounds.


Anyway, I am going to rent some old Seinfeld episodes now, I want to see the few scenes with black folks and Kramer interacting. Hey maybe we are not giving Michael Richards credit for one thing. The guy must have been a really great actor.