Will you take a check?

"AND ACCOUNTING OFFICER.
FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPT. (BOA) BANK OF AFRICAN,
ACCRA, GHANA.

Dear friend, TOP SECRET RE: TRANSFER OF ($6.5 USD) SIX MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS) I want to transfer to overseas the sum of ($6.5 USD) SIX Million Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars) from a Prime Bank in Africa . I would like to ask you to quietly look for a reliable and honest person who will be capable and fit to provide either an existing bank account or to set up a new Bank a/c immediately to receive this money, even an empty a/c can serve as far as it can receive money. I am DR MARTIN YARO. An accountant and personal confidant to late Mr. George A Roberts who died together with his wife in a plane crash on the October 31st 1999 on their way to attend wedding in Boston, he is an American, a physician and industrialist, he died without having any beneficiary to his assets including his account here in Ghana which he opened as his personal savings for the purpose of expansion and development of his company before his untimely death in 1999. The amount involved is ($6.500.000.00USD) SIX Million Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars), no other person knows about this account. I am contacting you for us to transfer this funds to your account as the beneficiary, I want to transfer the whole $6,500.000.00 (SIX Million Five Hundred Thousand USD) into a safe account abroad, but I don't know any foreigner. I am only contacting you as a foreigner because this money can not be approved to a local person here, without valid international foreign passport, but can only be approved to any foreigner with valid international passport or drivers license and foreign a/c because the money is in US Dollars and the former owner of the a/c late Mr. George A Roberts was a foreigner, and as such the money can only be approved into a foreign a/c. I need your full co-operation to make this work fine because the management is ready to approve this payment to any foreigner who has correct information of this account, which I will give to you, upon your positive response and once I am convinced that you are capable and will meet up with the inheritance procedures. At the conclusion of this business, you will be given 40% of the total amount, 55% will be for me, while 5% will be for expenses both parties might have incurred during the process of transferring. You should observe utmost CONFIDENTIALITY AND SECRECY in this transaction, and rest assured that this transaction would be most profitable for both of us because I will require your assistance to invest my share in your country. You should fill this form below and send to me immediately as soon as you receive this letter:



Your Full Name: ..................................... Your Telephone: .................................Your Age: .............................Sex…………………………..
Marital Status: .......................Nationality……………………..
Receiving Country: .................... Trusting to hear from you immediately.Sincerely DR MARTIN YARO"



Sorry Dr. Yaro, I will pass.



Hey how many of you get this shit in your e-mail boxes every day? These schemes from my cousins in Africa, trying to separate the rich A-merry-cans from their money. Honestly, I think the shit is kind of funny. I like reading them and seeing the different ways they try to pull off the hustle. Of course most of the time the grammar is so fucked up that it's almost laughable to read them.



And still they try. I must get at least thirty of these attempted hustles in my inbox every day. You would think that if my cousins can sit at a computer keyboard all day and type this kind of shit, they would at least try to put their skills to some good use. I mean can't one of these credit card companies hire them to do some customer service work like they do the Indians? I am just saying.



So on and on it goes, and tomorrow there will be more letters from the rich bankers in Africa.
And tomorrow some sucker here in A-merry-ca will bite.

Little Big Horn, Baghdad, what's the difference?

I never really liked those old Cowboy and Indian movies because I never got off on watching those Cowboys kill a bunch of Indians. The Cowboys always had guns and the Indians had bow and arrows. I mean how fair was that shit? Besides, I guess even at a young age I had this profound sense of fairness and a love for the underdog.

I must be one of just a few people in America who think Custer got what he deserved at Little Big Horn. After all, weren't we the ones intruding into sacred native American land in the Black Hills? What, you think a bunch of Sioux and Cheyenne decided to combine forces to fight the U.S. Calvary for nothing? George Armstrong Custer might have been a civil war hero but he fucked with the wrong Indians that day.

Which leads me to another George. This one not so much of a hero, although I am sure he considers himself very much a Cowboy. Just as we did with the Indians and their land back in 1876, this George invaded and intruded into what the people of Iraq consider their land, it pisses them off, and they are fighting back.

The Sunnis and the Shiites haven't combined forces like the Sioux and the Cheyenne yet but they will. And when they do, Little Big Horn will pale in comparison. I know people like the cheerleaders over at FAKE NEWS like to keep score and a running tally of the bad guys we have killed. "Sixty insurgents were killed by coalition forces today...." but that shit means nothing to me. I keep thinking about those old Cowboy and Indian movies and I can't help but wonder when this latest George is going to get his Little Big Horn. Althought when you think about it; with almost 4,000 American lives lost and many more to come, you have to wonder if George hasn't gotten his Little Big Horn already.