Monday, May 28, 2007

Summertime.


Now that Memorial day has almost come and gone, I think we can all agree that summer has officially started.




I know I am from Jamaica, but I am not a big summer fan. I never understood why people all retire to places like Florida and Arizona. To me, there is nothing like watching the seasons change, and the joy and anticipation that comes with every spring. Besides, I guarantee you that if there is a hell, it feels like Florida in August. So keep your humidity and bugs, I will stick to my East Coast weather thank you very much.


So anyway, now that Summer is officially here, I want to make some Summer time predictions:






*Gas prices will be closer to $4.00 a gallon than $3.00 a gallon.


*At least one hundred people will be shot to death here in Philly. And 85% of them will be black.


*There will be at least two major hurricanes to hit America's mainland.


*One hundred more soldiers will die in Iraq.


*I will go to at least one so called block buster flick and it will suck.


*There will be one popular song that will make me move something every time I hear it.


*Speaking of songs, the Philly summer anthem, Summer Time by Will Smith, will be in heavy rotation on every Philly radio station.


*FOX NEWS NETWORK will push a story about scary black folks or Muslims that will scare the hell out of middle America.


*I will see tattoos on someones breasts or legs who should have not been doing anything to draw attention to their body.


*Speaking of bodies; I will see some of my fellow human beings wearing some outfits in public, that will make me scratch my head and say: "What the hell were they thinking? And, is there a mirror or significant other in their home?


*Liars like Jay Tea over at Wizbang, and other conservatives bloggers, will continue to support this president and his fool hardy war right through the summer.


*Every weekend Philly will look like chocolate city for real because all the white folks will be at the Jersey shore.


*On the weekend of the Greek picnic, only black owned businesses will be open.


*And finally,Clarence Thomas will get a "coonie."


18 comments:

Liz Dwyer said...

You should charge readers a penny per accurate prediction or something because this is a list that's destined to come true. I think we'll see the $4 in a heartbeat out here in California. Hard to believe that when I moved out here 9 years ago, gas was only around $1.30. I remember thinking that was high. Clearly, I had no idea what was coming.

The Christian Progressive Liberal said...

I have a prediction, too, Field.

I predict that the CBC will split before this year's CBC Legislative Weekend, because of the foolishness going on with 26 of them willing to crawl into bed with Fox Noise.

Looks like Obama, Hillary and Edwards still aren't coming, and now it looks like Dodd and Kucinich may drop out as well, earning Bennie Thompson and Carolyn Cheeks Kilpatrick permanent residence on this blog as House Negroes of the Decade, for allowing this mess in the first place.

Dangerfield said...

Good post brotha field.

Eddie G. Griffin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Eddie G. Griffin said...

How about growing up when gas was 25-cents a gallon? Fact is, we are slaves to oil.

Anonymous said...

liz, I forgot that you guys in Cali probably already have $4 a gallon gas prices.

Yes eddie, we are slaves to the "Texas tea". But no matter how much we Americans bitch and moan, we just keep driving and driving :)

I swear if gas was $10 a gallon we would get used to it.

rikyrah said...

Hi FN,

Someone else who hates Summer - yeah!!

I love my four seasons, though I would like a second home in a warmer climate for those weekends during the winter when I just can't take it anymore. :)

The thing about gas is that it's all a hustle. This country is so ignorant and unwilling to DEMAND that this country force folks into using alternative sources.

Please explain to me how a ' Third World' country like Brazil is essentially oil-independent (they developed a fuel source based on SUGAR), but the USA can't do it?

Yeah, ok, whatever.

We're being played and gouged at the same time.

Christopher Chambers said...

I love summer. My favorite time of year. Much flesh exposed. Many beers consumed out on the deck. I get to harass my neighbors kids and call them hoodlums, etc. hahaha

We put uo w/gas prices b/c our society is engineered for it. If this was Europe, where cities are set up for walking, and there is efficient, clean mass transit, then it's no biggie that gas is so high.

PS Clarence Thomas, angry at the new bio (I interviewed the authors two weeks ago) has forged ahead with his autobiography and intends to attack all of the "angry black folks" who've attacked him in the past.

C-dell said...

Very good predictions. I am sure about 95% will come true. You speak true words. I hope you are wrong about gas. I am going broke buying gas.(probly not)

Francis Holland said...

Field, I did the winter thing in the Northeast for 37 years, shoveling snow, scraping ice off of my windshield with my debit card, walking half a mile to school only to find that school had been canceled because of the inhuman cold.

Now, we have winter in Bahia, Brazil and the leaves turn colors and fall off the trees. But the weather never gets below 55 degrees. I think birds fly south and flee winter because they know what time it is. When I was three years old, my favorite story was about a penguin who lived in the South Pole until he fled north on a piece of float ice and spent the rest of his days at the Equator. I guess I was imprinted early.

On another topic, have a look at this article I just wrote, based on a Black woman's first-hand account of what happens to her (and to others) when she sees a Black man and a white woman together in public. This is some real food for thought about Black people and Extreme Color Arousal (ECA).

plez... said...

i grew up in the Northeast (NY State) and vividly recalling how i wished i was living someplace else (that was warmer) during the winter. even though i live in georgia, as luck would have it, my job has had me taking the brunt of the Northeastern Winter for the past 2 years!

ya'll can have it... and hurrah for this Summertime Madness (courtesy of Will Smith) - hey, "Summer Time" is EVERYBODY's roll-down-the-windows summer jam!!!

Tasha said...

Such good predictions. I'm certain most of them will come true. If I were the gambling type, I'd put my money on it!

The Fabulous Kitty Glendower said...

Don't say "we." Because my ass stay on my bicycle. The other day I almost fell off, struggling with a box going to the post office, a dog on a leash that would not slow down, and SUVs and big trucks not stopping at the right on red. Bastards.....I hope when they are sleeping snugged in their beds, their SUVs blow up sky high.

rikyrah said...

CBC/ Faux News Debate Update:

UPDATE:

Richardson and Dodd will NOT be attending the debate

The Christian Progressive Liberal said...

Rikyrah,

thanks for that. Read what James Rucker had to say about Kucinich RSVPing for the Fox Debate over at Huffington Post: http://huffingtonpost.com

Anonymous said...

Gas isnt going to Spike like people think it will.


It will step up about 20 cents off and on...and spike another 10 for Labor Day.


UNLESS...




There is a Hurricane.


Then all bets are off.

Rich Fitzgerald said...

Love the list, but I still love summertime. I like fall also, but they can keep winter, other than to kill off the bugs.

GiGi - The Shy Giraffe said...

*Speaking of bodies; I will see some of my fellow human beings wearing some outfits in public, that will make me scratch my head and say: "What the hell were they thinking? And, is there a mirror or significant other in their home?

LMAO!!.. I have scratch my head countless time and wonders the same. Kudos for the fashion misfits?.. hee hee

=:O)