Friday, August 13, 2010

Even Doctors know the "N" word.

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Thirty thousand Negroes burning in the sun while they line up for affordable housing. Third World African country? Nope, Atlanta, Georgia. It always takes something like this to remind me how f*&^%d up life can be for some folks here in A-merry-ca.
But enough of that. Tonight I want to talk about my girl, Laura. The good doctor with the Ivy League Ph.D, who gives relationship advice with a conservative twist. You Negroes know that we have been down this road before, and we have been down it so often that we don't even need directions anymore. Once again another white person has a public meltdown because they just can't hold it in anymore. Hell they say "Nigger" so often at home and when they are hidden from you Negroes, that it becomes damn near impossible to hold it in when they are not around folks they trust.

"I, myself, realized I had made a horrible mistake"

No you didn't Laura, you said exactly what you wanted to say. Your mistake was saying it, publicly.

Now the funny part is that folks like Dr. Laura blame you Negroes for their use of the word. You blacks say it to each other, so why can't we? I don't know about the rest of you, but I have friends from other ethnic groups, (stop laughing, yes I do) and I swear to you that I have never called one of my Italian friends the "G" word or one of my Jewish friends the "K " word or my Irish friends the "M" word. And I guarantee you that you have never heard anyone on the radio- from another ethnic group- saying that stuff. If they did, it would be their last gig. You know it and so do I.

BTW, did you notice that I simply used the letters to describe the slurs, but I could spell out the slur reserved for us black folks? That's because I am black. But I don't belong to those other groups so I can't take those liberties with them. So when Dr. Laura's ignorant ass trots out the same bullshit line that "they do it so why can't we", it only exposes her as someone whose intelligence level is no higher than a trailer park lifer with a 10th grade education.

Oh field stop it. In that very broadcast Dr. Laura said that one of her very best friends is black and she has fun with him when they play basketball.

"SCHLESSINGER: Jade, welcome to the program.

CALLER: Hi, Dr. Laura.

SCHLESSINGER: Hi.

CALLER: I'm having an issue with my husband where I'm starting to grow very resentful of him. I'm black, and he's white. We've been around some of his friends and family members who start making racist comments as if I'm not there or if I'm not black. And my husband ignores those comments, and it hurts my feelings. And he acts like --

SCHLESSINGER: Well, can you give me an example of a racist comment? 'Cause sometimes people are hypersensitive. So tell me what's -- give me two good examples of racist comments.

CALLER: OK. Last night -- good example -- we had a neighbor come over, and this neighbor -- when every time he comes over, it's always a black comment. It's, "Oh, well, how do you black people like doing this?" And, "Do black people really like doing that?" And for a long time, I would ignore it. But last night, I got to the point where it --

SCHLESSINGER: I don't think that's racist.

CALLER: Well, the stereotype --

SCHLESSINGER: I don't think that's racist. No, I think that --

CALLER: [unintelligible]

SCHLESSINGER: No, no, no. I think that's -- well, listen, without giving much thought, a lot of blacks voted for Obama simply 'cause he was half-black. Didn't matter what he was gonna do in office, it was a black thing. You gotta know that. That's not a surprise. Not everything that somebody says -- we had friends over the other day; we got about 35 people here -- the guys who were gonna start playing basketball. I was going to go out and play basketball. My bodyguard and my dear friend is a black man. And I said, "White men can't jump; I want you on my team." That was racist? That was funny."


Yes Jade, that was funny. See Jade, what she is saying is this: I call my black friend Nigger all the time, and he doesn't mind. He is a conservative, just like me, we are not sensitive about those types of things.....let me stop.

Anyway, all is well that ends well. Dr. Laura, like so many before her, has apologized. And, I suspect, the apology tour will start any day now. Her bodyguard and "dear friend" will be by her side on all those talk shows and he will tell A-mery-ca what a good woman she is. Don't judge her for one little slip in judgement, he will say; I know what's in her heart. Ahh field, it was more than just one; she used the word Nigger six times! Six, one, what's the difference? You Negroes are so sensitive.

"I had made a horrible mistake, and was so upset, I could not finish the show."

Don't worry Dr. Laura, you can finish the show next week. And, fortunately for you, your sponsors will be there, and so will your listeners. In fact, I am betting that your listenership will double because of this little misstep. Isn't A-merry-ca beautiful?

* Pic courtesy of From the Left.

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